DID HE EVER REALLY LOVE ME ;-[ (15)
kindatheartnewtownards, Down Ireland7 Threads 39 PostsHI EVERYONE...PLEASE REPLY BACK WITH WHAT YOU THINK ...I AM DIVORCED 3 YRS AND ABOUT 6MTHS AGO I GOT TALKING TO A MAN WHEN I WAS OUT WITH FRIENDS .HE WAS IN A REALLY BAD STATE OF DEPRESSION AS HE WAS SEPARATED FROM HIS WIFE ..HIS WIFE HAD AN AFFAIRE WITH A MAN IN THE PLACE SHE WORKED SHE WAS ALSO AN ALCOHOLIC ..ONE NIGHT HER MOBILE WENT OFF TO SAY SHE HAD A TXT MESSAGE .SHE WAS COMPLETELY DRUNK AND PAST OUT ASLEEP .HE LEFTED THE PHONE TO READ THE MESSAGE ..SHE HAD MADE PLANS TO GET A HOUSE AND SET UP A HOME WITH THIS MAN AND CALLED HIM HER SOULMATE ...THE NEXT MORNING TO SAID TO HER ABOUT THE MESSAGE AND SHE PRETENDED SHE NEW NOTHING ABOUT WHAT THE TXT SAID ....ANYWAY WHILE I GOT TAKING TO THIS MAN HE COULDN,T SEE ANY WAY OUT AND I TRIED TO TELL HER THERE WAS LIFE AFTER SEPARATION WE BECAME FRIENDS AND I HELPED HIM WITH HIS DEPRESSION THEN WE GOT SO CLOSE TO EACH OTHER WE WENT INTO A RELATIONSHIP .BUT I MADE IT CLEAR TO HIM IF HE THOUGHT HIM AND HIS WIFE COULD MAKE AGO OF THINGS TO GO BACK AND HE SAID NO SHE DOESN,T WANT ME AND THE MARRIAGE IS OVER .I TOLD HIM THIS AS I COULDN,T FACE GETTING HURT AFTER A BAD MARRIAGE.HE WAS SO SURE HE WASN,T GOING BACK TO HER .THATS WHEN WE GOT REALLY CLOSE AND HAD A REALLY GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH EACHOTHER.WE STOOD BY EACH OTHER ..THEN ONE NIGHT HE CAME TO ME SAYING SHE WANTED TO COME BACK TO HIM AND HER 3 SONS WHO ARE 20 18 AND15 YRS OLD ..HE SAID IN WAS IN LOVE WITH ME BUT LOVED HER AND HE WANTED TO GO BACK TO HER AS SHE WAS ASKING FOR HELP WITH HER ALCOHOL PROBLEM AND THAT SHE LOVED HIM ..FROM THOSE WORDS CAME OUT OF HIS MOUTH MY WORLD JUST FELT IT WAS FALLING APART ..I KNEWAT THE MOMENT HE WASLEAVING ME TO TRY AND MAKE AGO WITH THINGS WITH HIS WIFE ITS A MONTH SINCE WE SPLIT AND I FEEL AS IF I AM NEVER GOING TO GET OVER HIM AS I FELL IN LOVE WITH HIM .HE DOESN,T WANT ME IN HIS LIFE ANYMORE AND SAID HE CAN,T BE FRIENDS WITH ME AS IT WOULDN,T BE FAIR ON HIS WIFE HIM OR ME ..I JUST FEEL USED AND LOST AND VERY HURT ...TELL ME YOUR THOUGHTS ON THIS 
sounds to me as if it was a rebound thing,if a person jumps from one long term relationship right into another relationship you can almost garentee that its a rebound.
at this moment in time you will feel as if you will never get over him,i know how u feel, when me and my wife split i was hurt,and thort exatly the same thing,now ive met a girl i never thort i would ever meet,and even tho i didnt think it at the time, if things hadnt of happend between me and my x wife then i wouldnt be with the girl im with today..
give it time,time is a great healer
at this moment in time you will feel as if you will never get over him,i know how u feel, when me and my wife split i was hurt,and thort exatly the same thing,now ive met a girl i never thort i would ever meet,and even tho i didnt think it at the time, if things hadnt of happend between me and my x wife then i wouldnt be with the girl im with today..
give it time,time is a great healer
KINDATHEART, IT'S NATURAL TO HAVE A GOOD CRY WHENEVER ANY RELATIONSHIP FALLS APART.
AFTER YOU'VE HAD A GOOD CRY YOU MIGHT LIKE TO ASK YOURSELF: DO YOU REALLY LOVE THIS MAN? DOES THE FACT THAT HE IS PRONE TO DEPRESSION WORRY YOU? DID HE REALLY LOVE YOU, OR WERE JUST THE FIRST PERSON THAT CAME ALONG THAT WAS WILLING TO LISTEN HIM AFTER THE BREAKDOWN IN HIS MARRIAGE?
AND MAYBE THE BIGGEST QUESTION: DO YOU THINK YOU CAN FIND A BETTER MAN ELSEWHERE?
IF, AFTER ASKING ALL THESE QUESTIONS, YOU FEEL AS IF THIS MAN IS THE MAN FOR YOU THEN YOU COULD TRY USING THE SAME EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL TACTICS THAT HIS WIFE'S USED TO GET HIM BACK.
IF NOT THEN IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE YOU FIND ANOTHER MAN THAT WILL PROVIDE YOU WITH MORE LONG TERM HAPPINESS THAN THIS MAN COULD.
YOU ARE A WONDERFUL PERSON. YOU DESERVE A WONDERFUL MAN TO SHARE YOUR LIFE WITH.
AFTER YOU'VE HAD A GOOD CRY YOU MIGHT LIKE TO ASK YOURSELF: DO YOU REALLY LOVE THIS MAN? DOES THE FACT THAT HE IS PRONE TO DEPRESSION WORRY YOU? DID HE REALLY LOVE YOU, OR WERE JUST THE FIRST PERSON THAT CAME ALONG THAT WAS WILLING TO LISTEN HIM AFTER THE BREAKDOWN IN HIS MARRIAGE?
AND MAYBE THE BIGGEST QUESTION: DO YOU THINK YOU CAN FIND A BETTER MAN ELSEWHERE?
IF, AFTER ASKING ALL THESE QUESTIONS, YOU FEEL AS IF THIS MAN IS THE MAN FOR YOU THEN YOU COULD TRY USING THE SAME EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL TACTICS THAT HIS WIFE'S USED TO GET HIM BACK.
IF NOT THEN IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE YOU FIND ANOTHER MAN THAT WILL PROVIDE YOU WITH MORE LONG TERM HAPPINESS THAN THIS MAN COULD.
YOU ARE A WONDERFUL PERSON. YOU DESERVE A WONDERFUL MAN TO SHARE YOUR LIFE WITH.
When i split from my ex 18 months ago, a very abusive man...i felt like my life was over...i cried for hours, ate like a pig...did all the things u do when depressed over a bloke..
time has healed me....i see him now and i know it gets up his nose to see me so happy with my life...
him on the other hand has cheated on his new girl friend with his ex partner and he is going down hill fast....
im....
coz i may not have man in my life yet but now i get to pick and choose who i want.....
You have to have time to de discover urself, ur self worth, u need time to kick ur self up ur own butt.....
but most of all u need to get over ur marriage 1st then deal with what this man did to u...
remember u love only u and ur kids......
a man comes 2nd to all of that..
look in the mirror and tell urself..
its coz im worth it...
and dont for get...cry scream shout rant.....
then get urself out and be who u want to be.....
best wishes...from someone who knows what and where u are rite now.
time has healed me....i see him now and i know it gets up his nose to see me so happy with my life...
him on the other hand has cheated on his new girl friend with his ex partner and he is going down hill fast....
im....
coz i may not have man in my life yet but now i get to pick and choose who i want.....You have to have time to de discover urself, ur self worth, u need time to kick ur self up ur own butt.....
but most of all u need to get over ur marriage 1st then deal with what this man did to u...
remember u love only u and ur kids......
a man comes 2nd to all of that..
look in the mirror and tell urself..
its coz im worth it...
and dont for get...cry scream shout rant.....
then get urself out and be who u want to be.....
best wishes...from someone who knows what and where u are rite now.
lets get things into perspective
1 the only person who can relieve that woman of her alcoholism is the woman herself
2 we can never forsee the future and chris is right with the term "rebound" and take heed of his comments
3im afraid you took pity on this man for reasons only you know and yes you have been hurt, you will have to use this experience to gain strength from it
4 time is a great healer and im sure this experience will guide you in the future
5take on board angels experience and learn from her progress that she has today
come and join us at the forums and have a ball and dont look back in anger look forward with pride and that " i matter
the leisure
1 the only person who can relieve that woman of her alcoholism is the woman herself
2 we can never forsee the future and chris is right with the term "rebound" and take heed of his comments
3im afraid you took pity on this man for reasons only you know and yes you have been hurt, you will have to use this experience to gain strength from it
4 time is a great healer and im sure this experience will guide you in the future
5take on board angels experience and learn from her progress that she has today
come and join us at the forums and have a ball and dont look back in anger look forward with pride and that " i matter
the leisure
To me it sounds like she got dumped by the guy she had an affair with, And is playing her husband. If she went that far with moving to a new home with him, She would do it again if the chance came around again. That's my thoughts anyway.
Angel_Diva: When i split from my ex 18 months ago, a very abusive man...i felt like my life was over...i cried for hours, ate like a pig...did all the things u do when depressed over a bloke..
time has healed me....i see him now and i know it gets up his nose to see me so happy with my life...
him on the other hand has cheated on his new girl friend with his ex partner and he is going down hill fast....
im.... coz i may not have man in my life yet but now i get to pick and choose who i want.....
You have to have time to de discover urself, ur self worth, u need time to kick ur self up ur own butt.....
but most of all u need to get over ur marriage 1st then deal with what this man did to u...
remember u love only u and ur kids......
a man comes 2nd to all of that..
look in the mirror and tell urself..
its coz im worth it...
and dont for get...cry scream shout rant.....
then get urself out and be who u want to be.....
best wishes...from someone who knows what and where u are rite now.
thank u for your kind words ..some of what u said has made me think .thank u for taking the time to read my forum and replying to it ..thank you time has healed me....i see him now and i know it gets up his nose to see me so happy with my life...
him on the other hand has cheated on his new girl friend with his ex partner and he is going down hill fast....
im.... coz i may not have man in my life yet but now i get to pick and choose who i want.....
You have to have time to de discover urself, ur self worth, u need time to kick ur self up ur own butt.....
but most of all u need to get over ur marriage 1st then deal with what this man did to u...
remember u love only u and ur kids......
a man comes 2nd to all of that..
look in the mirror and tell urself..
its coz im worth it...
and dont for get...cry scream shout rant.....
then get urself out and be who u want to be.....
best wishes...from someone who knows what and where u are rite now.
my friends think the same thing as you .she was known for seeing different men but blamed it on her being an alcolholic..then moving in to a house a making a new life with this man and walking away from her sons and husband ..i just don,t understand why he would let her treat him this way ??? anyway i am moving on with my life ..thank u for your reply
anyway i am moving on with my life ..thank u for your reply lint874: KINDATHEART, IT'S NATURAL TO HAVE A GOOD CRY WHENEVER ANY RELATIONSHIP FALLS APART.
AFTER YOU'VE HAD A GOOD CRY YOU MIGHT LIKE TO ASK YOURSELF: DO YOU REALLY LOVE THIS MAN? DOES THE FACT THAT HE IS PRONE TO DEPRESSION WORRY YOU? DID HE REALLY LOVE YOU, OR WERE JUST THE FIRST PERSON THAT CAME ALONG THAT WAS WILLING TO LISTEN HIM AFTER THE BREAKDOWN IN HIS MARRIAGE?
AND MAYBE THE BIGGEST QUESTION: DO YOU THINK YOU CAN FIND A BETTER MAN ELSEWHERE?
IF, AFTER ASKING ALL THESE QUESTIONS, YOU FEEL AS IF THIS MAN IS THE MAN FOR YOU THEN YOU COULD TRY USING THE SAME EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL TACTICS THAT HIS WIFE'S USED TO GET HIM BACK.
IF NOT THEN IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE YOU FIND ANOTHER MAN THAT WILL PROVIDE YOU WITH MORE LONG TERM HAPPINESS THAN THIS MAN COULD.
YOU ARE A WONDERFUL PERSON. YOU DESERVE A WONDERFUL MAN TO SHARE YOUR LIFE WITH.
thank you for your reply ..i am not the sort of person that would blackmail to get what i want ..i have decided to move on with my life ..thank u for replying back and thank u for your comment on thinking i was a wonerful person ...give me a bit of a esteme boost lol ..thank u once again .and good luck finding what u r looking for xAFTER YOU'VE HAD A GOOD CRY YOU MIGHT LIKE TO ASK YOURSELF: DO YOU REALLY LOVE THIS MAN? DOES THE FACT THAT HE IS PRONE TO DEPRESSION WORRY YOU? DID HE REALLY LOVE YOU, OR WERE JUST THE FIRST PERSON THAT CAME ALONG THAT WAS WILLING TO LISTEN HIM AFTER THE BREAKDOWN IN HIS MARRIAGE?
AND MAYBE THE BIGGEST QUESTION: DO YOU THINK YOU CAN FIND A BETTER MAN ELSEWHERE?
IF, AFTER ASKING ALL THESE QUESTIONS, YOU FEEL AS IF THIS MAN IS THE MAN FOR YOU THEN YOU COULD TRY USING THE SAME EMOTIONAL BLACKMAIL TACTICS THAT HIS WIFE'S USED TO GET HIM BACK.
IF NOT THEN IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE YOU FIND ANOTHER MAN THAT WILL PROVIDE YOU WITH MORE LONG TERM HAPPINESS THAN THIS MAN COULD.
YOU ARE A WONDERFUL PERSON. YOU DESERVE A WONDERFUL MAN TO SHARE YOUR LIFE WITH.
obsession and infatuation Come to mind. He probably thinks that things will be fine from now on, And they probably will be for a while. Keep your head high and look at it as an experience and a lesson learnt. Do what i do, Don't look at the past, Because it's the past. Look ahead and think of what there is to look forward to in the future. No one knows what the future holds, But your future is what you make it.
kindatheart: thank u for your kind words ..some of what u said has made me think .thank u for taking the time to read my forum and replying to it ..thank you
Dont forget....stay with us on here...we may be mad but by golly u couldnt find a better bunch of cyber mates to have......we tell it as it is.....
kindatheart: HI EVERYONE...PLEASE REPLY BACK WITH WHAT YOU THINK ...I AM DIVORCED 3 YRS AND ABOUT 6MTHS AGO I GOT TALKING TO A MAN WHEN I WAS OUT WITH FRIENDS .HE WAS IN A REALLY BAD STATE OF DEPRESSION AS HE WAS SEPARATED FROM HIS WIFE ..HIS WIFE HAD AN AFFAIRE WITH A MAN IN THE PLACE SHE WORKED SHE WAS ALSO AN ALCOHOLIC ..ONE NIGHT HER MOBILE WENT OFF TO SAY SHE HAD A TXT MESSAGE .SHE WAS COMPLETELY DRUNK AND PAST OUT ASLEEP .HE LEFTED THE PHONE TO READ THE MESSAGE ..SHE HAD MADE PLANS TO GET A HOUSE AND SET UP A HOME WITH THIS MAN AND CALLED HIM HER SOULMATE ...THE NEXT MORNING TO SAID TO HER ABOUT THE MESSAGE AND SHE PRETENDED SHE NEW NOTHING ABOUT WHAT THE TXT SAID ....ANYWAY WHILE I GOT TAKING TO THIS MAN HE COULDN,T SEE ANY WAY OUT AND I TRIED TO TELL HER THERE WAS LIFE AFTER SEPARATION WE BECAME FRIENDS AND I HELPED HIM WITH HIS DEPRESSION THEN WE GOT SO CLOSE TO EACH OTHER WE WENT INTO A RELATIONSHIP .BUT I MADE IT CLEAR TO HIM IF HE THOUGHT HIM AND HIS WIFE COULD MAKE AGO OF THINGS TO GO BACK AND HE SAID NO SHE DOESN,T WANT ME AND THE MARRIAGE IS OVER .I TOLD HIM THIS AS I COULDN,T FACE GETTING HURT AFTER A BAD MARRIAGE.HE WAS SO SURE HE WASN,T GOING BACK TO HER .THATS WHEN WE GOT REALLY CLOSE AND HAD A REALLY GOOD RELATIONSHIP WITH EACHOTHER.WE STOOD BY EACH OTHER ..THEN ONE NIGHT HE CAME TO ME SAYING SHE WANTED TO COME BACK TO HIM AND HER 3 SONS WHO ARE 20 18 AND15 YRS OLD ..HE SAID IN WAS IN LOVE WITH ME BUT LOVED HER AND HE WANTED TO GO BACK TO HER AS SHE WAS ASKING FOR HELP WITH HER ALCOHOL PROBLEM AND THAT SHE LOVED HIM ..FROM THOSE WORDS CAME OUT OF HIS MOUTH MY WORLD JUST FELT IT WAS FALLING APART ..I KNEWAT THE MOMENT HE WASLEAVING ME TO TRY AND MAKE AGO WITH THINGS WITH HIS WIFE ITS A MONTH SINCE WE SPLIT AND I FEEL AS IF I AM NEVER GOING TO GET OVER HIM AS I FELL IN LOVE WITH HIM .HE DOESN,T WANT ME IN HIS LIFE ANYMORE AND SAID HE CAN,T BE FRIENDS WITH ME AS IT WOULDN,T BE FAIR ON HIS WIFE HIM OR ME ..I JUST FEEL USED AND LOST AND VERY HURT ...TELL ME YOUR THOUGHTS ON THIS
It is the same as having new wound. The most painful time is when the injury happened. But it will heal bit by bit. Only time will make you feel better.
It was just a bad experience. Being positive is the key. Anything else doesn’t matter.
probably not, theres a lot like that.
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Created: Mar 2009
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