another oldie but goodie.......... ( Archived) (5)

Tired of constantly being broke & stuck in an unhappy marriage a
young husband decided to solve both problems by taking out a large
insurance policy on his wife with himself as the beneficiary, and
then arranging to have her killed.

A 'friend of a friend' put him in touch with a nefarious dark-side
underworld figure who went by the name of 'Artie.'

Artie then explained to the husband that his going price for
snuffing out a spouse was £5,000.

The husband said he was willing to pay that amount, but that he
wouldn't have any cash on hand until he could collect his wife's
insurance money.

Artie insisted on being paid at least something up front, so the
man opened his wallet, displaying the single £1 Coin that rested
inside. Artie sighed, rolled his eyes, & reluctantly agreed to
accept the £1 as down payment for the dirty deed.

A few days later, Artie followed the man's wife to the local Tesco
Super Store. There, he surprised her in the produce department &
proceeded to strangle her with his gloved hands & as the poor
unsuspecting woman drew her last breath & slumped to the floor........

The manager of the produce department stumbled unexpectedly onto
the murder scene. Unwilling to leave any living witnesses behind,
ol' Artie had no choice but to strangle the produce manager as well.

However, unknown to Artie, the entire proceedings were captured by
the hidden security cameras & observed by the store's security guard,
who immediately called the police. Artie was caught & arrested before
he could even leave the store.

Under intense questioning at the police station, Artie revealed the
whole sordid plan, including his unusual financial arrangements with
the hapless husband who was also quickly arrested.

The next day in the newspaper, the headline declared ...






(You're going to hate me for this ... )










'ARTIE CHOKES 2 for £1.00 AT Walmart'



G'day

Yeah I spose but that wouldnt get the daily groans going now would it