Need An Outside View (17)

Hi all,
last nite a friend called over with a problem, hes seeing this girl (well when i say seeing i mean hes known her since last december and they have been on/off up to now) and he says hes madly head over heels with her.

Now shes in the middle of a divorce around 6 years older(not thats thats a problem)and 2 kids and hes never been married and has one kid, he says he knows shes mad about him too but shes been burned with whole marrrage/divorce thing and one other serious relationship and just wants to stay single, but on the other hand they spend loads of time together and usually kiss and cuddle and end up sleeping together and the next day shes says that they shouldnt do any of it because they are just friends.

Now hes asked me for advice on it cause i was in a similar situation before but i didnt really deal with it all to well myself where it came to a point where i just cut all contact, and where it hurt to do that it was easier than all the yoyoing back and forth we were doing, so i guess that was right for me and i told him that.

But i was wondering what other advice there could be out there for him from other peoples point of view so if anyone has any ideas, opinions, experience, or advice i would love to hear about it and maybe relay some of it to him.

Thanks all for reading and replying (if you choose to do so)
Logan

If asked for advice I'd tell your friend he is being used as an emotional crutch and that if they are mad about each other then state it put it out in the open and deal with it or else just stick to being friends or like you did and cut contact. He is giving her all the things she likes without being demanding and she is taking advantage of that fact so he needs to tell her to fish or cut bait to be honest or else she will break his heart unfortunately. JMO hope he finds some peace of mind
xx

Sounds like good advice...

My stuff is very like that girls at the mo. She wont want anything too heavy, but will want the creature comforts that a warm body can provide.

Sounds to me like she's been using him as a crutch through what is always an emotional time (a divorce). I saw the same thing first hand with a friend, she kept on telling herself it was love when on the outside friends could see what was happening and warned her about it. But it's very hard to persuade a person when they're in that position. Emotions can be very intense

I agree with Nitak it seems as though he likes her more than she likes him or maybe he has thought about it a little more than she has given her situation.??

Tallaght.....thanks for the good advice and a good idea
twittwoo..... to be honest i think the heartbreak has already happened which is sad really cause that can be very bad for someone to go thru and bounce back from fully i know (or think anyway lol) but thanks for your opinion on it
Libra...... it can take time for the dust to settle from something like divorce and can as i said before change people sometimes for good sometimes for bad when my last serious relationship ended it took me nearly 2 years to bounce back and start dating again and tbh i still find it a bit hard
nitak...... no i think shes as much into him as he is with her when they are out with us they look great together their attension and focus seems to be completely directed at each other but i could be wrong i am a guy lol