The spark is what's important? Right? ( Archived) (9)

He's a total catch but sometimes awkward and hesitant, which makes me awkward and hesitant.

We've been dating for 3 months now. I like him and he likes me. But my "like" towards him is medium. I feel like I need a bit more cockiness in a guy. Someone who's bossy! He's more sweet, reserved and relaxed.

He explained to me how he's been getting a little stressed out. He likes me and wants to know if I'm wanting to be exclusive. I do! He's been the sweetest guy I've dated so far.

He's met my parents, brothers, sister, friends. Ive met his friends, brother, and plan on having dinner this week to meet the rest of his family.

*sigh* But, Ive never had any sort of exclusive relationship in the past. It makes me feel a bit tied down and obligated. Hes such a handsome, smart, shy, silly guy. So whats my deal? I'm afraid to take the plunge...

cuddle up with him and see the movie "Bicentennial Man".

For your age you definately come across as a mature & level headed lady. The only advice I can offer you is this, you are still very young & as this sounds like your very first really serious relationship , talk to him let him knwo how you really feel.

It does sound like you are both wanting different things from the relationship which isnt a bad thing, but you do need to tell him how you feel, that you arent quite ready for a exclusive serious commitment yet.

I do wish you all the best

Just surmising here, but I'd guess that your previous relationships have been with bad boys, or men who are a bit unpredictable, aggressive, or wild, maybe even ones that have thrown you over for other women or more excitement. You may have categorised them as your "type" so this one feels totally different and not "you".

You hit it on the head............you are afraid.

My advice would be to go with this one, give it a chance for, say, 6 months. Even though it doesn't seem like the ones you have felt comfortable with in the past, maybe it is time for you to change and mature and appreciate a "good" guy. Maybe you are ready for some real loving and after a little time you might even feel like you deserve it.

Fear is the number one reason that people don't get what they deserve in life, and it is usually because they don't give themselves a chance.......

"The spark is what's important? Right?"

- As one spark plug said to another!

Thanks so much for the advice, and I completely agree.

I deserve a little TLC. This is really exciting for me, my first boyfriend! OMG hehe Goin' steady! Im sure I made the right choice, he's awesome!

I, personally, don't accept "bossy" in a man. And there's nothing wrong with sweet, reserved and relaxed.

My fella doesn't come across as outwardly "dynamic" as one would expect (for my personality) but he has a very quiet strength about him.

Perhaps don't under-estimate this man, sounds like he could be very intuitive and has the measure of you, allowing you to be as free-spirited as you need to be?

Its worth giving him a chance, isn't it?