Being in a new relationship (34)
SereneGreenWexford, Ireland190 Threads 5 Polls 2,899 PostsJust something that occured to me recently....... Can you actually forget how to be with somebody?? I mean for anyone single say for two or three years or more, you build your own independent life, social circle etc around being single and then when you enter into a new relationship it can be so strange I'd imagine learning to consider someone else in your decisions and perhaps your domestic life eventually?? Any thoughts anyone?
SereneGreen: Just something that occured to me recently....... Can you actually forget how to be with somebody?? I mean for anyone single say for two or three years or more, you build your own independent life, social circle etc around being single and then when you enter into a new relationship it can be so strange I'd imagine learning to consider someone else in your decisions and perhaps your domestic life eventually?? Any thoughts anyone?
overthinking i reckon, you may grow independant but im sureyoull figure it out when the time comes!
it can be hard. i was like that with my ex because he was away for 18 months and we only saw eachother every 3 months for two weeks we forgot how to act around eachother. when he came home we didnt know what was normal for us cause neither of us could remember so it stayed as not seeing much of eachother for a while then i realised i wanted to see him more but he didnt see anything wrong with the relationship so we split.
to be honest im finding the thoughts of a potential relationship a bit daunting at the minute and i am worried i wont know how to let someone into my life again but i guess its something that varies from person to person and the start of every relationship is different. at the end of the day all you can do is go with the flow and see what happens
to be honest im finding the thoughts of a potential relationship a bit daunting at the minute and i am worried i wont know how to let someone into my life again but i guess its something that varies from person to person and the start of every relationship is different. at the end of the day all you can do is go with the flow and see what happens
bigjohndeere: overthinking i reckon, you may grow independant but im sureyoull figure it out when the time comes!
Thanks Dr Phil lolSereneGreen: Just something that occured to me recently....... Can you actually forget how to be with somebody?? I mean for anyone single say for two or three years or more, you build your own independent life, social circle etc around being single and then when you enter into a new relationship it can be so strange I'd imagine learning to consider someone else in your decisions and perhaps your domestic life eventually?? Any thoughts anyone?
I know what you mean. You get used to your own independance, doing your own thing, not accountable to anyone. I think that it can take a bit of adjusting alright but if with the right person, these things won't be as much as an issue. A relationship is all about compromise but considering someone else, etc can seem more like a nuisance if with the person that isn't right for you..
SereneGreen: Thanks Dr Phil lol
lol noproblem
Hmmm some interesting replies there, it seems to be sometimes I think......be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it!!! And then what 
Aadheen: I know what you mean. You get used to your own independance, doing your own thing, not accountable to anyone. I think that it can take a bit of adjusting alright but if with the right person, these things won't be as much as an issue. A relationship is all about compromise but considering someone else, etc can seem more like a nuisance if with the person that isn't right for you..
This is so true - but I think everything changes - the new single social scene that you have built up since you have been single will no doubt change again as friends start meeting partners and settling down - the dynamics will change you will have more time on your own and the potential of starting a new relationship will change...the time has to be right for you and the person definately has to be right for you to feel that you want to invest more time with just the two of you. Just let it happen - you shouldnt have to feel its a tug of war between your independance and a new partnership - you should be able to enjoy both
SereneGreen: Hmmm some interesting replies there, it seems to be sometimes I think......be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it!!! And then what
you adapt or you lose what could potentially be a lasting relationship I have to admit that I wonder about this sometimes. I quite like my own space at times. The romantic in me says that with the right person it can be worked out. As said before with a bit of consideration and compromise the wanting to spend time together should make it worthwhile.
MollyMise: I have to admit that I wonder about this sometimes. I quite like my own space at times. The romantic in me says that with the right person it can be worked out. As said before with a bit of consideration and compromise the wanting to spend time together should make it worthwhile.
yes the wanting to spend time together, i like that, if you want to spend time with this person you will won't you
SereneGreen: Hmmm some interesting replies there, it seems to be sometimes I think......be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it!!! And then what
so been chattedup by anyone interestin lately????
SereneGreen: Hmmm some interesting replies there, it seems to be sometimes I think......be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it!!! And then what
so been chattedup by anyone interestin lately????
SereneGreen: Just something that occured to me recently....... Can you actually forget how to be with somebody?? I mean for anyone single say for two or three years or more, you build your own independent life, social circle etc around being single and then when you enter into a new relationship it can be so strange I'd imagine learning to consider someone else in your decisions and perhaps your domestic life eventually?? Any thoughts anyone?
I lead the same kind of independent life style irrespective of being single or hooked up...
That might be my problem though!
bigjohndeere: so been chattedup by anyone interestin lately????
And well you know SereneGreen: And well you know
lol well at least ye might have make up and stuff in common!
bigjohndeere: lol well at least ye might have make up and stuff in common!
And then some 
SereneGreen: And then some
yeah put could you really bring yourself to it???
bigjohndeere: yeah put could you really bring yourself to it???
if you knew me you'd know the answer to that lol
SereneGreen: Just something that occured to me recently....... Can you actually forget how to be with somebody?? I mean for anyone single say for two or three years or more, you build your own independent life, social circle etc around being single and then when you enter into a new relationship it can be so strange I'd imagine learning to consider someone else in your decisions and perhaps your domestic life eventually?? Any thoughts anyone?
I don't think it's possible to forget how to be a couple if that's what both of you want. If you meet someone and it's working out you will both have to make a few compromises but they shouldn't feel really difficult. It's no different than if you make new friends. They somehow just fit into your life. If the person you meet is right, than it will all feel right, won't it???? Or am I living in lala land?
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Created: Dec 2010
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