Being in a new relationship (34)

Dec 30, 2010 8:48 AM CST Being in a new relationship
SereneGreen
SereneGreenSereneGreenWexford, Ireland190 Threads 5 Polls 2,899 Posts
Just something that occured to me recently....... Can you actually forget how to be with somebody?? I mean for anyone single say for two or three years or more, you build your own independent life, social circle etc around being single and then when you enter into a new relationship it can be so strange I'd imagine learning to consider someone else in your decisions and perhaps your domestic life eventually?? Any thoughts anyone?
Dec 30, 2010 8:53 AM CST Being in a new relationship
bigjohndeere
bigjohndeerebigjohndeeremullingar, Westmeath Ireland37 Threads 5 Polls 885 Posts
SereneGreen: Just something that occured to me recently....... Can you actually forget how to be with somebody?? I mean for anyone single say for two or three years or more, you build your own independent life, social circle etc around being single and then when you enter into a new relationship it can be so strange I'd imagine learning to consider someone else in your decisions and perhaps your domestic life eventually?? Any thoughts anyone?


overthinking i reckon, you may grow independant but im sureyoull figure it out when the time comes!
Dec 30, 2010 8:55 AM CST Being in a new relationship
salanky
salankysalankydublin, Dublin Ireland90 Threads 1 Polls 9,888 Posts
it can be hard. i was like that with my ex because he was away for 18 months and we only saw eachother every 3 months for two weeks we forgot how to act around eachother. when he came home we didnt know what was normal for us cause neither of us could remember so it stayed as not seeing much of eachother for a while then i realised i wanted to see him more but he didnt see anything wrong with the relationship so we split.

to be honest im finding the thoughts of a potential relationship a bit daunting at the minute and i am worried i wont know how to let someone into my life again but i guess its something that varies from person to person and the start of every relationship is different. at the end of the day all you can do is go with the flow and see what happens help
Dec 30, 2010 8:55 AM CST Being in a new relationship
SereneGreen
SereneGreenSereneGreenWexford, Ireland190 Threads 5 Polls 2,899 Posts
bigjohndeere: overthinking i reckon, you may grow independant but im sureyoull figure it out when the time comes!
Thanks Dr Phil lol
Dec 30, 2010 8:56 AM CST Being in a new relationship
Aadheen
AadheenAadheenTipp, Tipperary Ireland4 Threads 455 Posts
SereneGreen: Just something that occured to me recently....... Can you actually forget how to be with somebody?? I mean for anyone single say for two or three years or more, you build your own independent life, social circle etc around being single and then when you enter into a new relationship it can be so strange I'd imagine learning to consider someone else in your decisions and perhaps your domestic life eventually?? Any thoughts anyone?


I know what you mean. You get used to your own independance, doing your own thing, not accountable to anyone. I think that it can take a bit of adjusting alright but if with the right person, these things won't be as much as an issue. A relationship is all about compromise but considering someone else, etc can seem more like a nuisance if with the person that isn't right for you..
Dec 30, 2010 8:58 AM CST Being in a new relationship
bigjohndeere
bigjohndeerebigjohndeeremullingar, Westmeath Ireland37 Threads 5 Polls 885 Posts
SereneGreen: Thanks Dr Phil lol

lol noproblem
Dec 30, 2010 9:01 AM CST Being in a new relationship
SereneGreen
SereneGreenSereneGreenWexford, Ireland190 Threads 5 Polls 2,899 Posts
Hmmm some interesting replies there, it seems to be sometimes I think......be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it!!! And then what dunno
Dec 30, 2010 9:02 AM CST Being in a new relationship
CAITLIN765
CAITLIN765CAITLIN765DERRY, Derry Ireland12 Threads 4,637 Posts
Aadheen: I know what you mean. You get used to your own independance, doing your own thing, not accountable to anyone. I think that it can take a bit of adjusting alright but if with the right person, these things won't be as much as an issue. A relationship is all about compromise but considering someone else, etc can seem more like a nuisance if with the person that isn't right for you..


This is so true - but I think everything changes - the new single social scene that you have built up since you have been single will no doubt change again as friends start meeting partners and settling down - the dynamics will change you will have more time on your own and the potential of starting a new relationship will change...the time has to be right for you and the person definately has to be right for you to feel that you want to invest more time with just the two of you. Just let it happen - you shouldnt have to feel its a tug of war between your independance and a new partnership - you should be able to enjoy both
Dec 30, 2010 9:02 AM CST Being in a new relationship
salanky
salankysalankydublin, Dublin Ireland90 Threads 1 Polls 9,888 Posts
SereneGreen: Hmmm some interesting replies there, it seems to be sometimes I think......be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it!!! And then what
you adapt or you lose what could potentially be a lasting relationship dunno
Dec 30, 2010 9:07 AM CST Being in a new relationship
MollyMise
MollyMiseMollyMiseDublin, Ireland10 Posts
I have to admit that I wonder about this sometimes. I quite like my own space at times. The romantic in me says that with the right person it can be worked out. As said before with a bit of consideration and compromise the wanting to spend time together should make it worthwhile.
Dec 30, 2010 9:15 AM CST Being in a new relationship
wanyo1
wanyo1wanyo1gorey, Wexford Ireland1 Threads 647 Posts
MollyMise: I have to admit that I wonder about this sometimes. I quite like my own space at times. The romantic in me says that with the right person it can be worked out. As said before with a bit of consideration and compromise the wanting to spend time together should make it worthwhile.

yes the wanting to spend time together, i like that, if you want to spend time with this person you will won't you thumbs up
Dec 30, 2010 9:21 AM CST Being in a new relationship
bigjohndeere
bigjohndeerebigjohndeeremullingar, Westmeath Ireland37 Threads 5 Polls 885 Posts
SereneGreen: Hmmm some interesting replies there, it seems to be sometimes I think......be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it!!! And then what




so been chattedup by anyone interestin lately????tongue
Dec 30, 2010 9:21 AM CST Being in a new relationship
bigjohndeere
bigjohndeerebigjohndeeremullingar, Westmeath Ireland37 Threads 5 Polls 885 Posts
SereneGreen: Hmmm some interesting replies there, it seems to be sometimes I think......be careful what you wish for, because you just might get it!!! And then what




so been chattedup by anyone interestin lately????tongue
Dec 30, 2010 9:35 AM CST Being in a new relationship
paphos
paphospaphosWexford and, Dublin Ireland673 Posts
SereneGreen: Just something that occured to me recently....... Can you actually forget how to be with somebody?? I mean for anyone single say for two or three years or more, you build your own independent life, social circle etc around being single and then when you enter into a new relationship it can be so strange I'd imagine learning to consider someone else in your decisions and perhaps your domestic life eventually?? Any thoughts anyone?


I lead the same kind of independent life style irrespective of being single or hooked up...

That might be my problem though!

cool
Dec 30, 2010 9:38 AM CST Being in a new relationship
SereneGreen
SereneGreenSereneGreenWexford, Ireland190 Threads 5 Polls 2,899 Posts
bigjohndeere: so been chattedup by anyone interestin lately????
And well you know tongue
Dec 30, 2010 9:39 AM CST Being in a new relationship
bigjohndeere
bigjohndeerebigjohndeeremullingar, Westmeath Ireland37 Threads 5 Polls 885 Posts
SereneGreen: And well you know



lol well at least ye might have make up and stuff in common!
Dec 30, 2010 9:48 AM CST Being in a new relationship
SereneGreen
SereneGreenSereneGreenWexford, Ireland190 Threads 5 Polls 2,899 Posts
bigjohndeere: lol well at least ye might have make up and stuff in common!
And then some rolling on the floor laughing
Dec 30, 2010 9:51 AM CST Being in a new relationship
bigjohndeere
bigjohndeerebigjohndeeremullingar, Westmeath Ireland37 Threads 5 Polls 885 Posts
SereneGreen: And then some


yeah put could you really bring yourself to it???
Dec 30, 2010 9:53 AM CST Being in a new relationship
SereneGreen
SereneGreenSereneGreenWexford, Ireland190 Threads 5 Polls 2,899 Posts
bigjohndeere: yeah put could you really bring yourself to it???
if you knew me you'd know the answer to that lol
Dec 30, 2010 9:54 AM CST Being in a new relationship
LadyBlackAdder
LadyBlackAdderLadyBlackAdderKillarney, Kerry Ireland24 Threads 2,355 Posts
SereneGreen: Just something that occured to me recently....... Can you actually forget how to be with somebody?? I mean for anyone single say for two or three years or more, you build your own independent life, social circle etc around being single and then when you enter into a new relationship it can be so strange I'd imagine learning to consider someone else in your decisions and perhaps your domestic life eventually?? Any thoughts anyone?


I don't think it's possible to forget how to be a couple if that's what both of you want. If you meet someone and it's working out you will both have to make a few compromises but they shouldn't feel really difficult. It's no different than if you make new friends. They somehow just fit into your life. If the person you meet is right, than it will all feel right, won't it???? Or am I living in lala land?
Post Comment - Post a comment on this Forum Thread

Stats for this Thread

961 Views
33 Comments
by SereneGreen (190 Threads)
Created: Dec 2010
Last Viewed: May 11
Last Commented: Dec 2010

Share this Thread

We use cookies to ensure that you have the best experience possible on our website. Read Our Privacy Policy Here