I_LOVE_MY_JOB - I cried laughing? ( Archived) (6)

Mar 10, 2011 11:31 AM CST I_LOVE_MY_JOB - I cried laughing?
Next time you have a bad day at work think of this guy.

Bob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana . He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.

Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103 .5 on FM dial in Indiana, who was sponsoring a 'worst job experience' contest.

Needless to say, she won. Read his letter below.




Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother..
Last week I had a bad day at the office.
I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.
Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.
As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit.
This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater.
This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature.
It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.

Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints.
What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit.
This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch.
So, of course, I scratched it.
This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my a r*e started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done.

In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.
Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it, however, the crack of my ar * e was not as fortunate.
When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my ar * e.
I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.
His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.
Needless to say, I aborted the dive.
I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops tot all ing thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.
When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber.
The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't sh * t for two days because my ar * e was swollen shut. So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your ar * e.
Now repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.'
Whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?



laugh grin grin wave wave
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Mar 10, 2011 11:46 AM CST I_LOVE_MY_JOB - I cried laughing?
mikeglesga
mikeglesgamikeglesgaglasgow, Strathclyde, Scotland UK10 Threads 28 Posts
Nuliiiiiii: Next time you have a bad day at work think of this guy.

Bob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana . He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs.

Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103 .5 on FM dial in Indiana, who was sponsoring a 'worst job experience' contest.

Needless to say, she won. Read his letter below.

Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother..
Last week I had a bad day at the office.
I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all.
Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job.
As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit.
This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater.
This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature.
It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose.

Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints.
What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wet suit.
This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch.
So, of course, I scratched it.
This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my a r*e started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done.

In agony I realized what had happened. The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.
Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it, however, the crack of my ar * e was not as fortunate.
When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my ar * e.
I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator.
His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically.
Needless to say, I aborted the dive.
I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops tot all ing thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression.
When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet.
As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber.
The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't sh * t for two days because my ar * e was swollen shut. So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your ar * e.
Now repeat to yourself, 'I love my job, I love my job, I love my job.'
Whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?



rolling on the floor laughing I was going to have fish fingers for my dinner tonight aswell.you`ve just put me right off them rolling on the floor laughing yay dancing
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Mar 10, 2011 11:49 AM CST I_LOVE_MY_JOB - I cried laughing?
mikeglesga: I was going to have fish fingers for my dinner tonight aswell.you`ve just put me right off them
hahahahahahaha Good they not nice anywaytongue

Get a nice chippy Fresh Cod instead wink grin
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Mar 10, 2011 11:54 AM CST I_LOVE_MY_JOB - I cried laughing?
mikeglesga
mikeglesgamikeglesgaglasgow, Strathclyde, Scotland UK10 Threads 28 Posts
Nuliiiiiii: hahahahahahaha Good they not nice anyway

Get a nice chippy Fresh Cod instead


rolling on the floor laughing Have you had a look at the obama joke yet?Its jokes like his that i justconfuseddont get.cool <CIA will be onto him nowdancing teddybear
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Mar 10, 2011 11:54 AM CST I_LOVE_MY_JOB - I cried laughing?
demonfairy
demonfairydemonfairyNewton, North Carolina USA76 Threads 2 Polls 2,278 Posts
rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing wave
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Mar 10, 2011 2:10 PM CST I_LOVE_MY_JOB - I cried laughing?
lonelywoman55
lonelywoman55lonelywoman55scranton, Pennsylvania USA3 Threads 3,618 Posts
rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing wave
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