Not impressed (13)

Okay just to warn you this might get long...

A little info on my sister before I tell you my situation regarding her...

She has basicaly turned her back on the family, me, my mom, brothers etc..She is married to a total jerk who has done nothing but ruin her life. He has been cheating on her on several occasions since way before they got married. Which many times she has caught him herself and he has even admitted to some of it. Even a month after their wedding he leaves and dosn't come home till the morning to tell her its over between them. Then a few months later sweet talks her into taking him back and since then he hasn't changed. She had been calling me and my mother often crying on the phone about his actions asking US what she should do. After awhile as you can imagine and understand. My mom and I grew to resent her husband and want nothing to do with him. He is not aloud at my mom's house or any family gathering and sister knows and understands this. So of course now she has basicaly been doing much more with her stupid husbands side of the family than her own. But like we have said. She will have to learn the hard way and will regret it when our mom passes away.

Okay now to the situation. When I moved to the city a few years ago I had no immediate place to put my washer and dryer. And she and her husband needed one so they offered their basement and I said that since they would allow me to store it there they could use it. No problem right.

Well when my sister got married, she was the one who bought my bridesmaid dress. She knew I could not afford something too expensive and I had no problems paying for my dress as long as I had a say in what to wear which she told us at the beginning it was our choice as long as it was decent and the color matched what she wanted. So we all agreed. Well she ended up going with her sister in law without telling ME about it and got the dresses. Of course they got the most expensive which were nearly 200$ dresses. She knew I could not afford that and she said no worries for me to pay only half. And for that I babysat her children many times and was not paid for it. Now yea I don't mind taking my nieces for a few hours here and there but not every weekend so she and her husband and sister in law could go out and party while I was stuck having to do everything at their convenience.

Anywho she took back the bridesmaid dress after I told her from all the sitting and not first notifying me or including me in the choices of the dresses that I should not have to pay. I had no problems with her taking the dress. Not like I was going to use it again right?

Well now she just e-mailed me to tell me that they have found a new house they want to buy and that I have to find a place to store my washer and dryer ASAP or else she was going to sell them to her landlord and keep the money because I never paid for the bridesmaid dress. She did tell me I had the choice of taking the washer and dryer or the dress back.

There is no freaking way in hell I will let her sell MY washer and dryer that I let THEM use. I could have taken back the washer and dryer awhile back. I have room for it. But they were the ones stalling. So I am going to tell her that I want my washer and dryer back and for her to keep the stupid dress because I don't need it.

Sorry this was long. I just had to get it off of my chest. It really peeves me at how she is treating me and our family. Whats more upsetting to me is I would love to see my nieces more but she is always finding excuses that we can't see them. Saying she is too busy with her husband and his side of the family. My poor son keeps asking why we never see them and you can tell it hurts him because he was close with them at one time.

This just sucks big time. Like I need this after everything else I am going through latly

Sounds like sis is taking you and and your family for granted. This is very unfortunate.

She also appears to have low self esteem which is why she continues to take her cheating husband back. While i cannot explain why she does this....i can only say one day we wake up, realize, and learn from mistakes. Hopefully she will.

Hang in there.

Yes it is very unfortunate and sadly she has always sort of been like this her whole life. Always thinking of herself before others.

I just hope she wakes up soon because I have a feeling once our mom passes away she will really regret it.

Thanks for your kind words! Means a lot!

All of that and...

You can't resent her for not spending more time with you guys. She has her own family that she started as well. Letting all this get to you is not healthy at all. Keep being there for your mother and the family, that is what is important Tracy.

If I was there I would give you a great big hug! I miss all mommies meeting at the bus stop and talking and bashing men...well my experiences are a bit different so I toned it down once in a while...lol...but did learn a few things from you guys! lol...cough cough...we won't go there and talk about the chicken!...haha

Anyways...take your washer and dryer and she can keep the dress. Once again you are worrying too much about someone else...think about you Tracy. Of course it's easy right now for her to bash you guys...she feels in power...one day she will wake up and realize that we all make mistakes.

Your friend always!

oh..lol..and it was her wedding...she wanted to be specific about the dress...well toooo bad....she should have consulted you first.

I do not resent her for spending time with her own family. There is absolutly nothing wrong with that. I meant she does way more for her husband's side of the family than her own. She has always been that way.

Thanks Mychelle!

She isn't that bad of a person. Just dosn't realize the hurt she is causing the others.

That's good then :-)

And I guess maybe we always do tend to go more one way then the other. Hopefully she will realize soon. You have sooo much to offer a sister!