Divorced Men (28)
mychelleOttawa, Ontario Canada114 Threads 9 Polls 1,685 PostsPuck, she has an interest in what is happening in your life. Why does that sound so familiar?. Anyway, I too am divorced, and have attended meetings, interviews, and graduations with my ex also. Even to this day, I can talk to him, but I won't discuss who is or lets say isn't in my life, with him. Family is of paramount important, regardless of who decide to separate and go his/ her separate ways. Now, as long as the children knows that there is no way their parents are getting back together, then I would say it is o.k to go on that trip and stay in the hotel, but in separate rooms. But no kidding yourself, should you find that solution not workable either, when one of you , meaning the adult parent, suddenly have some yearning or desire for the other ex adult parent.
I admire the way some divorced parents can deal with their former spouses. My former husband tried to have that sort of a relationship with me. I tried - but we failed. My daughter suffered because of it. L.
Mychelle,
My ex and i do not share personal information, especially about our relationships. We do however, share a fair bit of info, as friends would. I think this is because, in a way we still care for each other ( not love) just because we spent 10 yrs together and had two children. We are connected that way.
Both of us have sat down together with our kids and explained to them that mom and dad have chosen to move on. We clearly explained that we would not be getting back together and they understand this. My ex has a boyfriend who has been living with her for almost the whole time we have been separted/divorced. When we went on our trip, she had this boyfriend.
There is only an issue if you or your ex "choose" to make one. In our situation everybody understands the situation and my ex and i choose to be cival. Communication is the key. We think this is a win win philosophy for everyone involved.
Don't get me wrong there are the odd disagreements. But no wars or real problems. Generally if may take an extra phone call to work something out with us if and when a disagrement does occur.
My ex and i do not share personal information, especially about our relationships. We do however, share a fair bit of info, as friends would. I think this is because, in a way we still care for each other ( not love) just because we spent 10 yrs together and had two children. We are connected that way.
Both of us have sat down together with our kids and explained to them that mom and dad have chosen to move on. We clearly explained that we would not be getting back together and they understand this. My ex has a boyfriend who has been living with her for almost the whole time we have been separted/divorced. When we went on our trip, she had this boyfriend.
There is only an issue if you or your ex "choose" to make one. In our situation everybody understands the situation and my ex and i choose to be cival. Communication is the key. We think this is a win win philosophy for everyone involved.
Don't get me wrong there are the odd disagreements. But no wars or real problems. Generally if may take an extra phone call to work something out with us if and when a disagrement does occur.
Dear Pucks,
I have to admit that yours is an extraordinary situation wherin both you and that boyfriend of your ex actually remain civil towards each other , and not act in a jealous manner. Such men are hard to find, at least where I am concern. You do have some remarkable qualities though, which makes you more mature for your years. Take this as a compliment coming from an older woman.
I have to admit that yours is an extraordinary situation wherin both you and that boyfriend of your ex actually remain civil towards each other , and not act in a jealous manner. Such men are hard to find, at least where I am concern. You do have some remarkable qualities though, which makes you more mature for your years. Take this as a compliment coming from an older woman.
thanks
Pucks,
Good thread, I'll be watching that one as I am also curious to see what the ladies are thinking of that topic thumbsup:
Whoever said this must be either on crack or using too much of that high quality BC Bud
A "relationship" is NOT limited to marriage. Relationship under one year - where they are not really recognized, common-law relationships DO breakdown.
In that light, ANY type of relationship that ends, whatever the reason, IS a failure, whether they result in a divorce or not. So what this guy is really looking for is someone that has NEVER been "corrupted" by a relationship. Something very hard to do at OUR age - unless he is in his early 20s and looking in that age group. Failing that, MOST of us will have some form of "baggage" from a previous relationship. Good or bad, it will depend on what THE individual affected does with the "baggage".
The last time I checked, it took two people to get involved in a relationship. When it breaks apart - short of an abusive situation, it is my experience that both involved in the relationship had a role to play in the breakup.
My two cents
From really chilly North Bay
Sylvain sends
Good thread, I'll be watching that one as I am also curious to see what the ladies are thinking of that topic thumbsup:
Whoever said this must be either on crack or using too much of that high quality BC Bud
A "relationship" is NOT limited to marriage. Relationship under one year - where they are not really recognized, common-law relationships DO breakdown.
In that light, ANY type of relationship that ends, whatever the reason, IS a failure, whether they result in a divorce or not. So what this guy is really looking for is someone that has NEVER been "corrupted" by a relationship. Something very hard to do at OUR age - unless he is in his early 20s and looking in that age group. Failing that, MOST of us will have some form of "baggage" from a previous relationship. Good or bad, it will depend on what THE individual affected does with the "baggage".
The last time I checked, it took two people to get involved in a relationship. When it breaks apart - short of an abusive situation, it is my experience that both involved in the relationship had a role to play in the breakup.
My two cents
From really chilly North Bay
Sylvain sends
Taking things for granted...
One, if not THE biggest lesson learned from my marriage
Funny how you forget the "small stuff" that make your relationship work after all these years.
Definitely something I'll be on the lookout for when the time comes
Sylvain
One, if not THE biggest lesson learned from my marriage
Funny how you forget the "small stuff" that make your relationship work after all these years.
Definitely something I'll be on the lookout for when the time comes
Sylvain
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