Does love really comes first? (44)

don't you think that in love your partner and yourself "together" should come first?

I assume you mean that she gives in return......the love......if she does all well and good....if not move on. It's all part of life isn't it? Living and learning. If you don't try what will you accomplish?

Cheers mate very well said and true

Love, respect and friendship are like a girdle – they stretch both ways. They have to, otherwise something has to break.

I had a friend who believed that if he gave, then at some point in time he would get something in return without ever asking for it – he believed that the reciprocation was automatic which, in this case, wasn’t.

He didn’t read the signs properly and kept giving more and more of his time to an unproductive relationship until he found himself in a hole from which he didn’t have enough mental strength to crawl out.

If you cannot keep some love for yourself, at least keep some self-respect.

so you and me kinda are in the same wavelength!

pity we didn't meet in that get-together at Golden Bay last time!

Well love can be a vey complicated thing, of course you think of how u feel first you know of your feelings not of how the other person in the relationship feels unless he/she tells u and than is it true or just said to please or to get into their pants. but there does have to be give and take in a relationship. it cant be one sided but u have to open yourself to that person and not feel afraid which is sometimes very difficult to do, as people can be afraid of getting hurt again. chances have to be taken in life maybe that special person is just around the corner or maybe u have to kiss a lot of toads to meet your prince charming! Who knows.

Question is, in reality, how much time is either side prepared to give to a relationship?

i believe if there is love in a relationship than the people in the relationship should want to spend as much time together as possible, but sometimes u also need some time apart for yourself to relax in your own company.

as i said before, one should NEVER PREPARE to do something in a relationship!... you give time to a relationship as much as you feel like. if you feel really good in it... you give a lot... if you don't, and you don;t give much time, then obviously there's something wrong... and should move on!

Giving is often more pleasureable than receiving. Take a meal for example - nobody likes to feel obligated to another. You are not doing a lady a favour by taking her out for a meal - she is doing YOU a favour by accepting!

It's much nicer for somebody to take another person out for a meal than eat out alone. It takes a certain 'grace' to accept the hospitality of another. In a loving relationship you give and expect nothing in return; however if the other person 'uses' you then you'll feel taken advantage of.

In the larger picture of things you do receive in return, because things 'come around' - you are nice to one person and some other person is nice to you. That's life.

Expecting something in return, and being upset and angry when your generosity is not returned by an individual is selfish and petty minded - just don't treat that person again, smile and move on!