Best blondie joke ever (40)
a blonde girl cruises into the petrol station and asks the attendant if she can borrow a coat hanger,,, the attendant says, what for. i gotta get into my car the blonde says i locked my keys in. the attendant gives her the hanger...... about half an hour later the attendant goes out the front to see how she is going..... and finds there is another blonde sitting in the front seat of the car saying a little to the left...... no a little to the right..?????
pauljb72: a blonde girl cruises into the petrol station and asks the attendant if she can borrow a coat hanger,,, the attendant says, what for. i gotta get into my car the blonde says i locked my keys in. the attendant gives her the hanger...... about half an hour later the attendant goes out the front to see how she is going..... and finds there is another blonde sitting in the front seat of the car saying a little to the left...... no a little to the right..?????
A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him: "I've kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, A Blonde."
The blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow blonde?"
The blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.
The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow blonde?"
Arealguy69: A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise some money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. She went to the playground, grabbed a kid, took him behind a tree, and told him: "I've kidnapped you." She then wrote a note saying, "I've kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and put it under the pecan tree next to the slide on the north side of the playground. Signed, A Blonde."The blonde then pinned the note to the kid's shirt and sent him home to show it to his parents.The next morning the blonde checked, and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting beneath the pecan tree. The blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, "How could you do this to a fellow blonde?"
A young man was showing off his new sports car to his girlfriend. She was thrilled at the speed.
"If I do 200mph, will you take off your clothes?" he asked.
"Yes!" said his adventurous girlfriend.
And as he gets up to 200, she peeled off all her clothes.
Unable to keep his eyes on the road, the car skidded onto some gravel and flipped over. The naked girl was thrown clear, but he was jammed beneath the steering wheel.
"Go and get help!" he cried.
"But I can't. I'm naked and my clothes are gone!"
"Take my shoe", he said, "and cover yourself."
Holding the shoe over her pubes, the girl ran down the road and found a service station. Still holding the shoe between her legs, she pleaded to the service station proprietor, "Please help me! My boyfriend's stuck!"
The proprietor looked at the shoe and said, "There's nothing I can do...he's in too far."
"If I do 200mph, will you take off your clothes?" he asked.
"Yes!" said his adventurous girlfriend.
And as he gets up to 200, she peeled off all her clothes.
Unable to keep his eyes on the road, the car skidded onto some gravel and flipped over. The naked girl was thrown clear, but he was jammed beneath the steering wheel.
"Go and get help!" he cried.
"But I can't. I'm naked and my clothes are gone!"
"Take my shoe", he said, "and cover yourself."
Holding the shoe over her pubes, the girl ran down the road and found a service station. Still holding the shoe between her legs, she pleaded to the service station proprietor, "Please help me! My boyfriend's stuck!"
The proprietor looked at the shoe and said, "There's nothing I can do...he's in too far."
Lok_Simpson: A young man was showing off his new sports car to his girlfriend. She was thrilled at the speed.
"If I do 200mph, will you take off your clothes?" he asked.
"Yes!" said his adventurous girlfriend.
And as he gets up to 200, she peeled off all her clothes.
Unable to keep his eyes on the road, the car skidded onto some gravel and flipped over. The naked girl was thrown clear, but he was jammed beneath the steering wheel.
"Go and get help!" he cried.
"But I can't. I'm naked and my clothes are gone!"
"Take my shoe", he said, "and cover yourself."
Holding the shoe over her pubes, the girl ran down the road and found a service station. Still holding the shoe between her legs, she pleaded to the service station proprietor, "Please help me! My boyfriend's stuck!"
The proprietor looked at the shoe and said, "There's nothing I can do...he's in too far."
"If I do 200mph, will you take off your clothes?" he asked.
"Yes!" said his adventurous girlfriend.
And as he gets up to 200, she peeled off all her clothes.
Unable to keep his eyes on the road, the car skidded onto some gravel and flipped over. The naked girl was thrown clear, but he was jammed beneath the steering wheel.
"Go and get help!" he cried.
"But I can't. I'm naked and my clothes are gone!"
"Take my shoe", he said, "and cover yourself."
Holding the shoe over her pubes, the girl ran down the road and found a service station. Still holding the shoe between her legs, she pleaded to the service station proprietor, "Please help me! My boyfriend's stuck!"
The proprietor looked at the shoe and said, "There's nothing I can do...he's in too far."
that was brilliant
Reminds me of a kiwi girlfriend telling me about the local customs.
Guys at a party would clench a piece of toilet paper between their buttocks, light it and see how many times they could run around a tree.
The activity was called "dance of the flaming arseholes"
Funny what you remember.......
Guys at a party would clench a piece of toilet paper between their buttocks, light it and see how many times they could run around a tree.
The activity was called "dance of the flaming arseholes"
Funny what you remember.......
Threadbare: Reminds me of a kiwi girlfriend telling me about the local customs.
Guys at a party would clench a piece of toilet paper between their buttocks, light it and see how many times they could run around a tree.
The activity was called "dance of the flaming arseholes"
Funny what you remember.......
Guys at a party would clench a piece of toilet paper between their buttocks, light it and see how many times they could run around a tree.
The activity was called "dance of the flaming arseholes"
Funny what you remember.......
Yeah, funny how YOU remember that and think about arseholes....
Gee, that is really funny Threadbare, oh hehahehahehaa...
So now it has gone from from being drogatory to women to being derogatory to kiwis eh?
Bout time you took your Tea cosy of your head aint it?
Rascane: Yeah, funny how YOU remember that and think about arseholes....
Gee, that is really funny Threadbare, oh hehahehahehaa...
So now it has gone from from being drogatory to women to being derogatory to kiwis eh?
Bout time you took your Tea cosy of your head aint it?
Gee, that is really funny Threadbare, oh hehahehahehaa...
So now it has gone from from being drogatory to women to being derogatory to kiwis eh?
Bout time you took your Tea cosy of your head aint it?
chill dude .. 
Rascane: Yeah, funny how YOU remember that and think about arseholes....
Gee, that is really funny Threadbare, oh hehahehahehaa...
So now it has gone from from being drogatory to women to being derogatory to kiwis eh?
Bout time you took your Tea cosy of your head aint it?
Gee, that is really funny Threadbare, oh hehahehahehaa...
So now it has gone from from being drogatory to women to being derogatory to kiwis eh?
Bout time you took your Tea cosy of your head aint it?
lol
you got the wrong guy threadbares our sweety he's never been derogatory to any of us. ooops
kiiwii: thats why i told him to chill
I thought that was funny I couldn't stop laughing poor threadbare, it wouldn't worry him he has a great sense of humour.lol
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Created: Dec 2008
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"HOW DO I GET ACROSS THE OTHER SIDE????"
The other blonde looks one way, looks the other, shrugs her shoulders and shouts back
"YOU ALREADY ARE!!!"