ManicCC Blog

It's My Life (A Short History) Part 3

When I was 23 I had reached the point where I was staring down in the abyss, and I saw that what I was becoming was my dad.
(

!!! ).
I was given a book to read by a "friend", (Not that I Understood the concept of friendship at the time). That book helped me find the right road, (If indeed there is such a thing).
The book was called, " Adult Children Of Alcoholics and Other Dysfunctional Family's - by Janet G. Woititz ", and it was all about me.
It described in detail the behavior of my family and myself, the roles we took on or were given, and more importantly how to make the change to a healthier way of life .
Looking back I honestly think it was then that I finally realised I was not alone,( There are a lot of people out there who've been f*cked over by their own nearest and dearest), and there no such thing as "Normal" behavior.

To cut a long story just a bit short I Changed, (As stated elsewhere "An Easy thing to say But a hard Thing to do").
I no longer have any regrets about my past, no "what if's" or "maybe's" haunt me, ( "What if's" and "Maybe's "Could teach ghosts about haunting)
I have learnt a few true lesson in life, on how to cope when shit happens.
These are:
it's nothing personal.
Do your best to deal with the repercussions
Try to put it behind you as best you can
Move on with your life
and It's not your fault.

At age 25 I came down to Plymouth for aweekend to see a friend, here I met the lady who was to become my wife and never left,
She already had twin boys (6years old),( now in their 30's), A few years later we had a daughter, (now 21 who still lives at home and is doing a degree course at the Art college here in Plymouth).
As I have mentioned on my profile my wife became so seriously ill that I had to stop doing paid work and become her full time carer,
I kept my self busy by getting involved in my daughters primary school, ( I was Chairman of the P.T.A and a parent Governor),
I also did some volunteer work with the red cross
We had our problems as everybody does but I was happy with my life and the way it was going

My wife died almost 7 years ago now of an unrelated cancer, that came totally out of the blue.It was a bit like being hit by a train even though was no sign of the rails it ran on.

I grieved, I got better, and now am looking for someone to share the rest of my life with.

Now you may be wondering "Why the f*ck has he told me all this? I hardly know him"
Well it's my life. and maybe someone who reads this will take some comfort from the main message in it. "YOU ARE NOT ALONE"
Add to that,
I have nothing to hide and am serious in my intent. So lets just call it, (almost), full disclosure, On the grounds that if someone who reads this ends up being the one I am looking for
it's better they know what kind of lunatic they may be getting involved with.

But as I have said on my profile .......
"It's not that I don't Have emotional luggage, It's more of I have laundered it Ironed and folded it, And put it in the third draw down next to the one labelled Shirts!"

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Jul 2016
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AN OPEN LETTER TO MRS MAY

Dear Mrs May,
Opps!
I do rather think you misjudged the mood of the electorate when you called for a general election..
Although I didn't vote for your party, I want to wish you the best of British luck as our PM, (You're gonna need it).
I am confidant that in the days to come your fellow Tory MP's will all rally behind you. Unfortunately for you this will be so they can, (metaphorically) stab you in the back.

You must know by now that your credibility as a leader lies in tatters around you. Your personal power trip is ending,If you haven't already, you will soon become aware of the dark whispers in the corridors of parliament, As the power plays, and maneuverings, go on around you, and just out of sight, plans for the assassination of your political career are being drawn up.

Personally I would look forward to watching you squirm and wriggle as you wait for the blade to fall, (It's going to be a bloodbath.), unsure of which, of your most trusted colleagues will be the one to shaft you first.
That said, I would willingly forgo my personal pleasure in seeing you, (as the saying goes,), "being thrown under the bus" and would applaud your actions, if you gracefully, (for the good of the country of course), stood down now rather than wait for you own personal "ides of March" to come around

In closing I would just like point out that Politics is a bit like a sport. in this case the sport is fox hunting and you my dear lady are the cornered fox about to be ripped apart by the baying hounds
Your's Sincerely
Manic CC

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Jun 2017
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Common Market? Yes! E.U? No!

The Ideals Of a Common Market, where we can have free and unrestricted movement of people, trade, goods, services and finance was, is and always will be an Ideal we should work towards achieving, Not just in Europe but globally.

When Britain first Joined the EEC, (European Economic Community), That is all it was , A common market. But it changed into something else. The EU, (European Union)
And so started the move from some of the major country's in the EU to to merge Europe in to a single Fedralised European state by pushing forward policies for a single currency, a European Central Bank, formation of a Europeian army and ever closer political union, Hoping that this would end up with the European Parliament as it's legislative house, the European court as the Judaical house, the council of ministers as it's Executive.
In fact if not in name The United States of Europe

This is not what we signed up for.
I don't think that, being a state in a Federalised single European State, or even, having a Federalised single European State, is a good idea at all.

Now don't get me wrong here, when it comes to politics I am on the Left. I'm a good old fashioned British,("From each according to his ability, to each according to his need", nothing wrong with being filthy rich, but it means you have a greater social responsibility to take care of those who can't take care of themselves), Socialist. who believes in democracy, (Not a Marxist,Trotskist,Stalinist, Commie at all).
I am not some foaming at the mouth small brained right wing racist bigot

This is why on the 23 of June I voted to leave the EU.
If it had been just an issue of being a member of a common market I would've voted to remain, But it wasn't so I didn't

I know that leaving the EU will have some short term repercussions. But this will normalise after a few years.

To carry on trading with EU and still have access to the single market we will have to sign up to a similar trade agreement as Norway has with the EU now.
That will mean we will still have to agree to the principles of free movement of people,goods, services and finance across Europe

And now we have to renegotiate out trading terms with the EU
with out all the federalisation plans that go along with being a full member.

In the short term this will be a bit like a messy divorce, with bitter recriminations being thrown around from all sides as we argue over who gets to keep the dog.
Both France and Germany will try and make the terms of our leaving and our new trade agreement with the EU as tough as they possibly can, partly to punish us for leaving, and partly in the hope that this will put off any of the any other country in the EU from thinking about doing what Britain just did.

But it is my belief that in the long term we will be better off being close friends with Europe rather than being married to it
It may take a while for our new relationship with Europe to normalise, But it will eventually.

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Jul 2016
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It's My Life (A short History) Part2

I loved that place, acres and acres of woods out in the badlands of deepest darkest Norfolk, (where the rush hour consists of the postman and the milkman )
My only real saving grace at this time was that I was not a bully (unless they were a bully and in that case it was, "Stand by to have yer heid kicked in, yer scunner")
In the first year I cheeked the teachers, I didn't give a monkey about rules, at least once a week I had a detention to serve, but I was a smart arse,( Good grades all round just for spite ). I settled down a bit after a while, (only a bit mind you I was still a very wild child), and did really well without having to put much effort in to it.
At the age of 16 I left school with 3 'A'Lvl's, 6'O'Lvl's,a whole bunch of CSE's, and an attitude.
When I left school I didn't go back to my family's house.

All through my late teens and my early 20's I hated the world, everyone, and every thing, in it including me,(except my motor bike). So I cheerfully set course on a cycle of self destructive behavior,( "Arr full speed ahead!" "Aye aye! Cap'un!")
I was not a nice person at all.(To put it mildly! You could say I was an violent unfeeling little sh1t head and you wouldn't be wrong!)
As I saw it at the time there are only a few problems that could not be solved by punching somebody's lights out, and I was very good at problem solving.

(cont in part 3 ) (if you wish to comment do it under Part 3)

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Jul 2016
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It's My Life, (A short History)Part1

I thought I'd tell you one of those "It's a long story ", story's.

I am a the product of a very middle class family, that had skeletons in it's cupboards,( oh hell yeah, we had a whole bloody graveyard full).
I'm the youngest of 6. I had three brothers, two sisters, an uncaring mother and a violent, abusive farther. I never saw my dad hit any of the rest of my family, just me,( I may need a violin for the next bit). He'd hit me with any thing that came to hand, a stick, a shoe, a belt, And if nothing came to hand there was always the good old fist in the side of the head. The last time he hit me was with a can of beans, More, about that later.
My brothers emulated his behavior towards me, I took quite a few nasty beating off of them, up until the point I could give them back as good,(Or as bad), as I got. I was 7 when they realised they could put me down, but I wouldn't quit an being only 7 I fought like a cornered rat.(pull hair, scratch, bite, Gouge kick, up close and nasty). after that My dear brothers acted like my mother and sisters,and ignored me.

This is how it went on for 3 more years. regular poundings from my daddy, and being excluded by every other family member. To spite him I would never cry, he could hit me as hard as he wanted to, but I wouldn't give the bastard the satisfaction. This was Normal,(with a capitol N even ), family life to me.

The one time I told someone about what my dad did to me, was when I was 10 a PE teacher at school, asked me where I got the bruising .all down my back. So I told him,( my dad had taken using his belt on me).
He informed social services. I didnt know this until a few days later a social worker came came to call. Talk about happy family's.

Two weeks later....A social workers report ......
"..... The child is a liar, He makes up story's, He's careless, Clumsy, Sullen, "why I wouldn't put it passed him to have thrown himself down the stairs." (that was the family explanation for the bruises) ,We never saw or heard nothing, ect ,ect "
Was basically what the social workers report said.

My dad saw that as his cue to, (In his words,) "Teach(POW),You(Thwak) Not(Thunk), To(Bash).Drag.Outsiders(SPLAT). Into. Family . Matters.(KERPOWIE)", and he punctuated his words with the previously mentioned baked bean tin.
I dont clearly remember happened next Whether this was down to the blow on the head I had just got, or the fact I blew a fuse.
I do know I lost it big time. Red mist is the best way to describe it. The next thing I do clearly remember is my two oldest brothers struggling with me trying very hard to restrain me, and remove a cricket bat from. My Farther was sitting on the floor across the other side of the room, his noes all over his face looking totally shocked.
What I'm told happened is I headbutted him, then shoved him across the room where he fell against the wall. Then according to my brothers, I picked up the cricket bat and went for him
(Charge) and proceeded to give him 10 yrs worth of poundings. The one thing I do remember is Shouting over and over "You touch me again and your dead!" I know I meant it, and so did he. The look on his face was one of fear.
It's a shames to say, But for a long time I thought of that look on his face as my happiest childhood memory, (I dont now)

The upshot of this was When that school year ended, Having passed my 11+ with a passing mark that was in the top 5% for that year, in the City we lived in, (not bad for a worthless, brainless Idiot) I was destined to go to a grammar school, but my parents decided that I would be sent to a boarding school instead.

(Cont in part2) (if you wish to comment do it under Part 3)

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Jul 2016
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This is a list of ManicCC's Blogs. Click here for ManicCC's Blog List

ManicCC Blog (5)

It's My Life (A Short History) Part 3

AN OPEN LETTER TO MRS MAY

Common Market? Yes! E.U? No!

It's My Life (A short History) Part2

It's My Life, (A short History)Part1

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