Hey guys did you ever notice the one girl at the

Tonight I went to a birthday party knowing that no one I knew was going to be there. But what did I care? I had been working way too hard and have had no social life lately. I was just finishing up reading the blogs and great stories on this date site. It was time to go out and have fun. So I walked into the bar with intention to slip into mix unnoticed, just wanting to get in blend in with the crowd. I felt awkward walking across the open space of the room when finally I reached the bar for a drink. I secretly began to search familiarity in faces but could only see blank faces staring back at me. I was void of reaction hiding my emotion of fear of the unknown. All I could sense was the indifference in people. I was already feeling dread as I made my way to a seat and sit pretty. Pretty for what? Whom? I forced myself to stay positive and slipped into the rythmnic trance of the music. I wasn't alone as I glanced others in front of me groove on with musical enthusiasm. I began to blend in the mix in this way, the music broke the ice to be part of an approving audience. Clapping and cheering the band on. I realized the more I tried to be myself and with confidence, the more awkward the feeling it was to be confident in my moves, in my ways, it was so hard to not reach out to someone. I was thinking about this date site for guiidance So I move and I reached out to the guy standing left of me, introduced myself as Anne. Abandoning all tradition and made the first move. I was glad he was friendly and at ease an approach from a complete stranger. We ended up hanging out together for a few more drinks and then he left.
After that I felt more at ease the faces of people were warm and inviting. So then I was left alone again it was easy to enjoy the atmosphere, and the music. I mingled and had talk with other bar patrons. I suddenly noticed a guy staring at me from across the bar. It took me a few minutes to see that he was secrtetly glancing at me, the longer the glance the more I was compelled to glance back. It was just us across the bar in a silent stare. At last, the moment was broken and this was my chance to stare without hime knowing so with a coy look in my eye we met and locked in and time. This lasted for about a half an hour then he walked out of the room and I was missing him. looked for him to come back but he didnt. There were other affirmations to notice and felt that this was my opportunity to exit the scene feeling satisfied and pursued. The rest of the night was great and I thought about when I should be going home. Note: I had to be the one to make it happen for the difference. I was writing about this all along but never knew this in reality. When the bar announced the last call for alcohol, I finished up my beer and left the bar alone. Not that feeling of lonliness like when you end up going home with no one to sleep with or not even with the humiliation of being rejected, no prospering onlookers seeking your s*xual favors and no phone numbers to call and save you from falling into the nothingness in space and time of indifference. It was aloneness when a girl just chooses to be cause she can and got something from the night. Perhaps I am reaching the end to virtual dating as it's becomming a reality in my life. Hooray.. The moral of the story, Indifference in people stem from your expectations of you expecting to be th recipent. The passive player.Seek first to understand then to be understood. Have the courage to make a difference in someones world and impact their lives and make your point. whether secretly or outloud, stomp the indifference and be different. People refused me time after time, I was indifferent but Ive changed my direction and risked to be different. I was made aware of what I've missed in giving the time of day. Now if I would have just paid attention to detail