dispute settlement (6)

A big city lawyer went duck hunting in rural Tennessee.

He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a

farmer's field on the other side of a fence.



As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer

drove up on his tractor and asked him what he was doing.



The litigator responded, 'I shot a duck and it fell in

this field, and now I'm going to retrieve it.'



The old farmer replied, 'This is my property, and you

are not coming over here.'



The indignant lawyer said, 'I am one of the best trial

attorneys in the United States and, if you don't let me

get that duck, I'll sue you and take everything you own.



The old farmer smiled and said, 'Apparently, you

don't know how we settle disputes in Tennessee. We settle small

disagreements with the 'Three Kick Rule'.'



The lawyer asked, 'What is the 'Three Kick Rule'?'



The Farmer replied, 'Well, because the dispute occurs

on my land, I get to go first. I kick you three times and

then you kick me three times and so on back and forth until someone

gives up.'



The attorney quickly thought about the proposed contest

and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He

agreed to abide by the local custom.



The old farmer slowly climbed down from the tractor and

walked up to the attorney. His first kick planted the toe

of his heavy steel toed work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped

him to his knees.



His second kick to the midriff sent the lawyer's last

meal gushing from his mouth.



The lawyer was on all fours when the farmer's third

kick to his rear end, sent him face-first into a fresh cow pie.



The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to

get to his feet.



Wiping his face with the arm of his jacket, he said,

'Okay, you old fart. Now it's my turn.'



(I love this part)



The old farmer smiled and said, 'Nah, I give up........



You can have the duck.'

Good one Sharmini

Good one Sharmini

The Sensitive Man
A woman meets a man in a bar. They talk; they connect; they end up
leaving together.

They get back to his place, and as he shows her around his apartment.
She notices that
one wall of his bedroom is completely filled with soft, sweet,cuddly
teddy bears.

There are three shelves in the bedroom, with hundreds and hundreds of
cute, cuddly teddy
bears carefully placed in rows, covering the entire wall! It was
obvious that he had taken
quite some time lovingly to arrange them and she was immediately touched
by the amount of thought he had put into organizing the display.

There were small bears all along the bottom shelf, medium-sized bears
covering the
length of the middle shelf, and huge, enormous bears running all the
way along the top shelf.
She found it strange for an obviously masculine guy to have such a
large collection of Teddy Bears.

She is quite impressed by his sensitive side, but doesn't mention this
to him.
They share a bottle of wine and continue talking and, after a while,
she finds herself
thinking, 'Oh my God! Maybe, this guy could be the one! Maybe he
could be the future father of my children?'

She turns to him and kisses him lightly on the lips. He responds
warmly. They continue to kiss,
the passion builds, and he romantically lifts her in his arms and
carries her into his bedroom where they
rip off each other's clothes and make hot, steamy love.

She is so overwhelmed that she responds with more passion, more
creativity, more heat than she
has ever known. After an intense, explosive night of raw passion with
this sensitive guy, they are
lying there together in the afterglow. The woman rolls over, gently
strokes his chest and asks coyly,

'Well, how was it?'

The guy gently smiles at her, strokes her cheek,looks deeply into her
eyes, and says:
'Help yourself to any teddy from the middle shelf'

good one