Sparky's dating phrases and what they mean ( Archived) (16)

Which brings me to my new rules for dating and the phrases that will cause me to run to the nearest exit.

1) I will never hurt you. (This one is a major warning sign that they are planning on hurting you in the future.) How can you make a blanket guarantee like this? Blanket guarantees are a sign that you should run fast and far away.

2) It (whatever it is... example spending more time together, your relationship) depends on you. Of course it does because he doesn't care enough to put time into the relationship.

3) I am friends with all my exes. (the unspoken thought being that you still have feelings for them all and will bed them whenever you get the chance).

4) I want to get more serious with you soon. This kiss of death means that he is keeping his options open and that when the aforementioned exes arrive on the scene you will be toast.

5) I want to take things slow. Translation: I am just not that attracted to you but I will keep you hanging on because I am lonely.

6) I like you alot. Of course, I like puppies and elves too but I would never think about having a serious relationship with one.

7) Why should we define our relationship? I like it the way it is. Of course you do because I do all the work and you just have to exist. Also, no definition means you can bow out whenever you want.

8) We are just too different. I found someone else who is more like me and I am done with you.

9) I am not usually very open with other people or I don't "let people in" easily but I will let you in. Translation: I have tons of secrets and if you found out you would run very fast to the nearest exit.

Warning: This is all in fun.

No one has a coment on this. I am so very disappointed. I at least expected some comments about my low self-esteem or how jaded I am.

Hi lol

well guess why.....

now i need new victims .......who did`nt read this thread....yet...

"3) I am friends with all my exes. (the unspoken thought being that you still have feelings for them all and will bed them whenever you get the chance)."

So?

What's wrong with that?

Some of them are really, really lovely!

Make love not war.............. boink an ex for a peaceful world!

Just don't boink an ex when you are in a relationship - or you add to the 'ex' list!

Why are you so jaded?

Why don't you have any self-esteem?

Don't bash yourself - bash me!

Not bashing myself. Just wanted to get some conversation going. Knew comments about myself would do that. I am such an evil genius. Mwahaha.

So sorry Boban. Should have realized you had a master plan before I posted.

You succeeded.

Well done!

You ARE an evil genius!