going nowhere fast (30)
Doesn't really address your concerns? Especially about something important like distance between you two. Sounds like a bad start right?
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Can you imagine if you were in the same city and met and had that conversation.
It sounds like the guy was trying "way too hard" to impress, please you....
It sounds like the guy was trying "way too hard" to impress, please you....
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He also seems to want to talk about what he feels is important? This would raise red flags all over the place JMO
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iamkimmyp: I just got off the phone with someone that I "met" on a different site. I am disappointed that I did not want to go out with this guy.
He was friendly, talkative and intelligent. The thing is he was very talkative. The call dropped as I have terrible service in my area. I called him back and he dominated most of the conversation.
I am a quiet person until I know someone but even when I did try to speak it was difficult. At that point, I just let it go. I did ask about the distance between our cities. We both live in the same state but in different cities. I asked if it was a problem. He said it might be and then kept talking as if I had not said anything.
Really? so I asked him again if that would be a problem if we were to start dating. He eventually said again it would be a problem. But again, acted like I had not brought up an important thing. I felt like this guy was just waiting his turn to speak and not really interested in me or anything I might have to say. At that point, I know that I used the distance as a way to get out of things. I told him that maybe he should find someone closer to him. He did not seem to pick up on it. I had to say it again and then wish him good luck. Then, he got it and we ended the call.
I feel somewhat bad about this but I know that I just did not click with him and his personality or interests.
It is disappointing but at the same time I feel okay with the fact that I said something. I could have just let the call end and never call back again.
Does anyone have an opinion on this? Has anyone been in a similar situation? What did you do? Or what would you do if you were in my shoes?
He was friendly, talkative and intelligent. The thing is he was very talkative. The call dropped as I have terrible service in my area. I called him back and he dominated most of the conversation.
I am a quiet person until I know someone but even when I did try to speak it was difficult. At that point, I just let it go. I did ask about the distance between our cities. We both live in the same state but in different cities. I asked if it was a problem. He said it might be and then kept talking as if I had not said anything.
Really? so I asked him again if that would be a problem if we were to start dating. He eventually said again it would be a problem. But again, acted like I had not brought up an important thing. I felt like this guy was just waiting his turn to speak and not really interested in me or anything I might have to say. At that point, I know that I used the distance as a way to get out of things. I told him that maybe he should find someone closer to him. He did not seem to pick up on it. I had to say it again and then wish him good luck. Then, he got it and we ended the call.
I feel somewhat bad about this but I know that I just did not click with him and his personality or interests.
It is disappointing but at the same time I feel okay with the fact that I said something. I could have just let the call end and never call back again.
Does anyone have an opinion on this? Has anyone been in a similar situation? What did you do? Or what would you do if you were in my shoes?
I think If you really didnt connect was to walk away, sad to say, but i guess thats how it works,
better now than later
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he could have just been nervous, me being a talker Id much rather them talk a lot then not say anything at all , silence is soo awkward , though I understand being a wee bit irritated about not being able to get a word in, but I have been guilty of that myself, luckily for me they didn't care and still seemed to enjoy speaking to me blabbering and all.
But agree you still need to feel some kind of connection.
But agree you still need to feel some kind of connection.
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Not fast enough!
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I think you did the right thing. Don't feel bad at all, you'd feel real bad if you put a bunch of time into a relationship with a man that is only interest in himself, and what he has to say.
I have dealt too many times with men like this, it doesn't get any better down the line.
I have dealt too many times with men like this, it doesn't get any better down the line.
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thanks everyone for your opinions...i may have been quick to judge as I am guilty of that at times...he may have been nervous too- didn't think of that at the time...but I stick with the fact that I felt no connection at all.
In future I will work on more patience with myself and others- that is a flaw I have- it is only getting worse with age lol
I turned 40 this year and it is definitely getting worse lol
I really value all your input- thanks so much!
In future I will work on more patience with myself and others- that is a flaw I have- it is only getting worse with age lol
I turned 40 this year and it is definitely getting worse lol
I really value all your input- thanks so much!
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jvind: You are right to look at both sides of the story. There was one line in her story that stuck with me about her feeling as if he didn't care what she had to say.
That just raises too many red flags for me
I agree that she made the choice she felt was right for her. That just raises too many red flags for me
"first" anything , phone convo's, meet ups etc can be very nerve wracking and sometimes people act a little differently then they normally would in everyday life, and that I for one have been guilty of babbling on and on almost forgetting to breath in between sentences lol and I have had the same experience as well as the all consuming awkward silence and in most situations I am glad that I was not judged and did not judge as "not such a great person" because some of them turned out to be really good friends whom I enjoy tremendously with whom we are able to laugh at ourselves and each other, I could have been very easily misjudged. NOT saying that he was , just saying there could more to it, and there is no right or wrong in deciding to or not to pursue further interaction, just sharing that I had similar experiences and though some didnt turn into more some turned into great friendships that I am glad to have.
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iamkimmyp: I just got off the phone with someone that I "met" on a different site. I am disappointed that I did not want to go out with this guy.
He was friendly, talkative and intelligent. The thing is he was very talkative. The call dropped as I have terrible service in my area. I called him back and he dominated most of the conversation.
I am a quiet person until I know someone but even when I did try to speak it was difficult. At that point, I just let it go. I did ask about the distance between our cities. We both live in the same state but in different cities. I asked if it was a problem. He said it might be and then kept talking as if I had not said anything.
Really? so I asked him again if that would be a problem if we were to start dating. He eventually said again it would be a problem. But again, acted like I had not brought up an important thing. I felt like this guy was just waiting his turn to speak and not really interested in me or anything I might have to say. At that point, I know that I used the distance as a way to get out of things. I told him that maybe he should find someone closer to him. He did not seem to pick up on it. I had to say it again and then wish him good luck. Then, he got it and we ended the call.
I feel somewhat bad about this but I know that I just did not click with him and his personality or interests.
It is disappointing but at the same time I feel okay with the fact that I said something. I could have just let the call end and never call back again.
Does anyone have an opinion on this? Has anyone been in a similar situation? What did you do? Or what would you do if you were in my shoes?
He was friendly, talkative and intelligent. The thing is he was very talkative. The call dropped as I have terrible service in my area. I called him back and he dominated most of the conversation.
I am a quiet person until I know someone but even when I did try to speak it was difficult. At that point, I just let it go. I did ask about the distance between our cities. We both live in the same state but in different cities. I asked if it was a problem. He said it might be and then kept talking as if I had not said anything.
Really? so I asked him again if that would be a problem if we were to start dating. He eventually said again it would be a problem. But again, acted like I had not brought up an important thing. I felt like this guy was just waiting his turn to speak and not really interested in me or anything I might have to say. At that point, I know that I used the distance as a way to get out of things. I told him that maybe he should find someone closer to him. He did not seem to pick up on it. I had to say it again and then wish him good luck. Then, he got it and we ended the call.
I feel somewhat bad about this but I know that I just did not click with him and his personality or interests.
It is disappointing but at the same time I feel okay with the fact that I said something. I could have just let the call end and never call back again.
Does anyone have an opinion on this? Has anyone been in a similar situation? What did you do? Or what would you do if you were in my shoes?
I think you handled things perfectly....You weren't vague, but you weren't harsh about it either. Sometimes people don't click together and in a sense that is a very underestimated factor...Again however, I think you did just fine.
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iamkimmyp: thanks everyone for your opinions...i may have been quick to judge as I am guilty of that at times...he may have been nervous too- didn't think of that at the time...but I stick with the fact that I felt no connection at all.
In future I will work on more patience with myself and others- that is a flaw I have- it is only getting worse with age lol
I turned 40 this year and it is definitely getting worse lol
I really value all your input- thanks so much!
regardless of the rest , having a connection is important, and you shouldnt feel bad about not pursuing further interaction. I turned 40 this year as well and you would think we would have it all figured out by now but i find I learn something everyday and whats funny is interacting with people here and reading people's opinions and there point of views both men and women whether I agree or disagree has taught me alot about myself and some of misconceptions I have hadIn future I will work on more patience with myself and others- that is a flaw I have- it is only getting worse with age lol
I turned 40 this year and it is definitely getting worse lol
I really value all your input- thanks so much!
guess things arent so black and white like i use to think 
wish you luck in finding that someone for you------ This thread is Archived ------
gemeh22: I agree that she made the choice she felt was right for her. "first" anything , phone convo's, meet ups etc can be very nerve wracking and sometimes people act a little differently then they normally would in everyday life, and that I for one have been guilty of babbling on and on almost forgetting to breath in between sentences lol and I have had the same experience as well as the all consuming awkward silence and in most situations I am glad that I was not judged and did not judge as "not such a great person" because some of them turned out to be really good friends whom I enjoy tremendously with whom we are able to laugh at ourselves and each other, I could have been very easily misjudged. NOT saying that he was , just saying there could more to it, and there is no right or wrong in deciding to or not to pursue further interaction, just sharing that I had similar experiences and though some didnt turn into more some turned into great friendships that I am glad to have.
That is great you were able to have the patience and were ultimately rewarded with fantastic friendships. There is also the factor of the unique experiences of the different people commenting.
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gemeh22: regardless of the rest , having a connection is important, and you shouldnt feel bad about not pursuing further interaction. I turned 40 this year as well and you would think we would have it all figured out by now but i find I learn something everyday and whats funny is interacting with people here and reading people's opinions and there point of views both men and women whether I agree or disagree has taught me alot about myself and some of misconceptions I have had guess things arent so black and white like i use to think wish you luck in finding that someone for you
Feeling bad about not having figured things by 40??? I am not sure people get comprehension of things until maybe....100
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jvind: That is great you were able to have the patience and were ultimately rewarded with fantastic friendships. There is also the factor of the unique experiences of the different people commenting.
I agree , its one of the things I enjoy about these forums, seeing other peoples opinions and point of views. I truly have learned alot from the people on here
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jvind: Feeling bad about not having figured things by 40??? I am not sure people get comprehension of things until maybe....100
yeah just as we're falling into out graves ...ding..I finally have it figured out ------ This thread is Archived ------
iamkimmyp: thanks everyone for your opinions...i may have been quick to judge as I am guilty of that at times...he may have been nervous too- didn't think of that at the time...but I stick with the fact that I felt no connection at all.
In future I will work on more patience with myself and others- that is a flaw I have- it is only getting worse with age lol
I turned 40 this year and it is definitely getting worse lolI really value all your input- thanks so much!
In future I will work on more patience with myself and others- that is a flaw I have- it is only getting worse with age lol
I turned 40 this year and it is definitely getting worse lolI really value all your input- thanks so much!
We Just start Learning Good, at 40
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gemeh22: I agree , its one of the things I enjoy about these forums, seeing other peoples opinions and point of views. I truly have learned alot from the people on here
Me Too
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iamkimmyp: I just got off the phone with someone that I "met" on a different site. I am disappointed that I did not want to go out with this guy.
He was friendly, talkative and intelligent. The thing is he was very talkative. The call dropped as I have terrible service in my area. I called him back and he dominated most of the conversation.
I am a quiet person until I know someone but even when I did try to speak it was difficult. At that point, I just let it go. I did ask about the distance between our cities. We both live in the same state but in different cities. I asked if it was a problem. He said it might be and then kept talking as if I had not said anything.
Really? so I asked him again if that would be a problem if we were to start dating. He eventually said again it would be a problem. But again, acted like I had not brought up an important thing. I felt like this guy was just waiting his turn to speak and not really interested in me or anything I might have to say. At that point, I know that I used the distance as a way to get out of things. I told him that maybe he should find someone closer to him. He did not seem to pick up on it. I had to say it again and then wish him good luck. Then, he got it and we ended the call.
I feel somewhat bad about this but I know that I just did not click with him and his personality or interests.
It is disappointing but at the same time I feel okay with the fact that I said something. I could have just let the call end and never call back again.
Does anyone have an opinion on this? Has anyone been in a similar situation? What did you do? Or what would you do if you were in my shoes?
He was friendly, talkative and intelligent. The thing is he was very talkative. The call dropped as I have terrible service in my area. I called him back and he dominated most of the conversation.
I am a quiet person until I know someone but even when I did try to speak it was difficult. At that point, I just let it go. I did ask about the distance between our cities. We both live in the same state but in different cities. I asked if it was a problem. He said it might be and then kept talking as if I had not said anything.
Really? so I asked him again if that would be a problem if we were to start dating. He eventually said again it would be a problem. But again, acted like I had not brought up an important thing. I felt like this guy was just waiting his turn to speak and not really interested in me or anything I might have to say. At that point, I know that I used the distance as a way to get out of things. I told him that maybe he should find someone closer to him. He did not seem to pick up on it. I had to say it again and then wish him good luck. Then, he got it and we ended the call.
I feel somewhat bad about this but I know that I just did not click with him and his personality or interests.
It is disappointing but at the same time I feel okay with the fact that I said something. I could have just let the call end and never call back again.
Does anyone have an opinion on this? Has anyone been in a similar situation? What did you do? Or what would you do if you were in my shoes?
Yes, I have. This happened to me every time I was around him. He dominated the conversation and acted as though nothing I said was important. He talked over me when I did try to slide in a word.
I finally told him to "SHUT UP"!!! Then, as I was about to talk, he interrupted me yet again.....so I repeated myself even louder and then told him like it was.
Granted, your dude might have been nervous, but I consider it to be very rude. I'd say you did well not to lose your temper and end the phone call.
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He was friendly, talkative and intelligent. The thing is he was very talkative. The call dropped as I have terrible service in my area. I called him back and he dominated most of the conversation.
I am a quiet person until I know someone but even when I did try to speak it was difficult. At that point, I just let it go. I did ask about the distance between our cities. We both live in the same state but in different cities. I asked if it was a problem. He said it might be and then kept talking as if I had not said anything.
Really? so I asked him again if that would be a problem if we were to start dating. He eventually said again it would be a problem. But again, acted like I had not brought up an important thing. I felt like this guy was just waiting his turn to speak and not really interested in me or anything I might have to say. At that point, I know that I used the distance as a way to get out of things. I told him that maybe he should find someone closer to him. He did not seem to pick up on it. I had to say it again and then wish him good luck. Then, he got it and we ended the call.
I feel somewhat bad about this but I know that I just did not click with him and his personality or interests.
It is disappointing but at the same time I feel okay with the fact that I said something. I could have just let the call end and never call back again.
Does anyone have an opinion on this? Has anyone been in a similar situation? What did you do? Or what would you do if you were in my shoes?