Inner resources or outer influence? (11)
I use common sense. You dont have to be a rocket scientist to hold fast against evil forces.
I also use my strong values system. This includes many values such as dignity, self worth, equality and respect.
I also use my strong values system. This includes many values such as dignity, self worth, equality and respect.
Yes, I'd begin by responding much the same way.
Let me take it a step further: when people who know how to push your buttons really hit hard, how do you keep defences up?
Over the years I created a Useless People List. My ex mother-in-law became the first member, shortly after she told me "God doesn't think you're fit to be a mother, so stop trying". Anyone on the list can be in the same room with me, even speak to me directly and I do not acknowledge them to be the person with whom I have issues. I can be polite and dismissive without affronting them. Mind set. Takes practice.
Let me take it a step further: when people who know how to push your buttons really hit hard, how do you keep defences up?
Over the years I created a Useless People List. My ex mother-in-law became the first member, shortly after she told me "God doesn't think you're fit to be a mother, so stop trying". Anyone on the list can be in the same room with me, even speak to me directly and I do not acknowledge them to be the person with whom I have issues. I can be polite and dismissive without affronting them. Mind set. Takes practice.
I try to learn to take a step back and look at things clearly instead of instant reaction. Although I will admit that always dosn't work that way but I have learned that its best to go through life with a good head on your shoulders and a clear outlook on things. Makes the road a lot less bumpier.
by not lowering myself to their tactics.
easier said then done sometimes and while i have challenges with others at times, i do try to make the best of it and never resort to some of the things i have seen some resort too.
easier said then done sometimes and while i have challenges with others at times, i do try to make the best of it and never resort to some of the things i have seen some resort too.
Permit me to call you on this Darren... at the end of your last sentence are you not resorting to the same tactics you purport to avoid?
No IMO its ok to call on somone if you have a point, or to disagree.
its how you go about doing that calling or how you make the point that shows your truths against mean spirtedness and vengelfulness.
its how you go about doing that calling or how you make the point that shows your truths against mean spirtedness and vengelfulness.
Agreed.
Bringing you back to my point though... your last statement could be construed as taking an air of 'holier than thou', n'est pas? Leaving that part unsaid would not lessen the value of your response.
Bringing you back to my point though... your last statement could be construed as taking an air of 'holier than thou', n'est pas? Leaving that part unsaid would not lessen the value of your response.
Yes perhaps...then not saying anything would probably be best route but that is just not me. I choose to do it in a way that is to the point without being outright rude.
A compromise. Fair enough. 
When people push my buttons ... there is a piece of me that is grateful because it allows me to see them. Is it their issue for pushing my buttons or my issue for having a button to push?
...just my thoughts...
...just my thoughts...
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Created: Dec 2006
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When you find yourself standing alone, how do you hold fast to your own truths against the forces that would tear you down?
How do you find strength to take the high road and resist pettiness, mean-spiritedness, vengefulness?
I don't pretend to be better than anyone else at this. We've all had challenges... looking for shared experience and insight, thanks.