the idiot report ( Archived) (22)

number one idiot of 2006


i am a medical student currently doing a rotation in toxicology at the poison control center. today this woman called in very upset because she caught her little daughter eating ants. i quickly reassured her that the ants are not harmful and there wouuld be no need to bring her daughter into the hospital. she calmed down and at the end of the conversation happened to mention that she gave her daughter some ant poison to eat in order to kill the ants. i told her that she better bring her daughter into the emergency room right away.

here's your sign lady wear it with pride.

number two idiot of 2006


early this year someone boeing employees on the airfield decided to steal a life raft from one of the 747s. they were successful in geting it out of the plane and home. shortly after they took it for a float on the river they noticed a coast guard helicopter coming towards them. it turned out that the chopper was homing in on the emergency locator beacon that activated when the raft was inflated. they are no longer employed at boeing.

here's your sign guys dont get it wet the paint might run.

Brute! I Love this thread! Keep'em comming!

number three idiot of 2006

a man wanting to rob a dowbtown bank of america walked into the branch and wrote this:" put all your muny in this bag". while standing in line waiting to give this note to the teller he began to worry that someone had seen him write the note and might call the police befor he reached the teller's window. so he left the bank of america and crossed the street to the wells fargo bank. after waiting a few minutes in line he handed his note to the wells fargo teller. she read it and surmising from his spelling errors that he wasn't the brightest
light in the harbor told him that she could not accept his stickup note because it was written on a bank of america deposit slip and that he would either have to fill out a wells fargo deposit slip or go back to bank of america. looking somewhar defeated the mab said ok and left. he was arrested a few minutes later as he was waiting in line back at bank of america.

dont bother with this guy's sign. he probably couldn't read it anyway.

I Love it! More! More! You are on a roll! And having me roll over at it. Hence the >

number four idiot of 2006

a motorist was unknowingly caught in an automated speed trap that measured his speed using radar and photographed his car. he later received in the mail a ticket for $40 and a photo of his car. instead of payment he sent the police a department a photograph of $40 and a photo of his car. several days later he received a letter from the police thar contained another picture this time of handcuffs. he immediately mailed in his $40.

wise guy.......but you still get a sign.

Brute-

Funny as hell Was curious if this from the Darwin Awards?

number five idiot of 2006


a guy walked inot a little corner store with a shotgun and demanded and all of the cash from the cash drawer. after the casher put the cash in a bag the robber saw a bottle of scotch the he wanted behind the counter on the shelf. he told the cashier to put the it in to the bag as well but the cashier refused and said because i dont believe you are over 21. the ribber said he was but the clerk still refused to give it to him because she didn't believe him. at this point the robber took his driver's licebse out of his wallet and gave t to the clerk. the clerk looked it over and ageed thar the man was in fact over 21 and she put the scotch in the bag. the robber theb ran from the store with his loot. the cashier promptly called the police and give the name and address of the robber the he got off the license.
they arrested the robber two hours later.

this guy definitely needs a sgin.