What would you do? ( Archived) (7)

A question on friendship...

Ok, heres the issue:

My best friend of 17 years has began popping pills, is never happy, and very snappy lately. He told me that he wrote his wife a letter that he wants a divorce because she don't clean the house the way he likes it. They have only been married a little over a year and have a son of 15 months. He has gotten progressivly worse through the years stomping on peoples hearts all along.

His wife loves him unconditionally and didnt see this coming. She was on her way home and planned on spending some time with him to rekindle the love. I didnt tell her what was in the note, but I did tell her that when I talked to him earlier that night he was finishing up a note to her and suggested that it may not be what she wanted to hear. I also told her that I was concerned with his state of mind lately and that the only reason I said anything to her is because I am worried about him. Needless to say he is mad at me now for talking to her about it, but really I tried to talk to him and he thinks he is just fine!

Was I wrong? Should I have not said a word? I feel pretty bad about losing my friend but would feel worse if he did something stupid becuase I didnt say anything!

please offer your opinion!

He isn't in his right mind and as a friend you did the right thing by talking to his wife....the pills or what is behind his need to take them is what is doing his talking for him!!!!!

One day maybe he will see that you did it out of friendship and concern for him but not until he deals with what is going on...It's a hard place to be in for you Michelle...BUT I think you did the right thing and for the right reasons because it came from your heart!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is one of them damned if you do's and damned if you dont's so, i will have to say it may have been better to not say anything at all. I have been through something kinda similiar so i learned that opening my mouth just ruined the relationship i had with them. I dont know why, because i would want someone to be honest with me, but in my situation it caused it to be worse on me. JMO

I wouldnt have said a word if I truly believed he would be ok but after 17 yrs ...7 of which we dated and were engaged, I think I know him pretty well! I do feel bad and wish it hadnt came to this, but I also feel good knowing that I did it out of concern, not to hurt anyone.

I honestly feelthis guy is good for noone, including himself.

I also feel she is setting herself up, and has little self love... I only say this because I did have to eventually accept that I stayed in an abusive relationship...

His talk of the housework...is a smoke screen. My ex usedto acuse me of all kinds of things when he was guilty of something.

You can only be honest with them both. They may not like it, but you are doing it out of concern...?

There is a child that needs to come first. ALL other issues and feeling need to be set aside and seperated, and making sure this child will be ok.

No offense to your best friend, but sounds to me like he is just like my ex husband, and the wife is better off without him. Men like that are never satisfied, no matter how hard you try. No woman will ever satisfy him, so she is just best to leave him alone.

Again, no offense, but your friend sounds like a loser.