What's up with that? ( Archived) (9)

Jul 8, 2007 1:36 AM CST What's up with that?
lovely1971
lovely1971lovely1971Rosemount, Minnesota USA3 Threads 105 Posts
I have come across several men here who are still not over their exes....so why are they here looking for love? I understand it is difficult getting over someone you had a connection with, but why is it a person decides to find someone else before they have moved on????

Is it fair to the new person to start something before finishing the last?

Is this common?????dunno sigh
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Jul 8, 2007 1:42 AM CST What's up with that?
mylifewithu
mylifewithumylifewithuSpringfield, Missouri USA174 Threads 23,670 Posts
I have found the same thing here and other sites.
I have dated some men not over there ex's, its not a good thing to get involved with anyone still living in the past and not moving on unless you are a patient person and can help them thru it.
Maybe thats what they think they are doing is moving on by dating others. Sometimes people do need others love and support to move on I believe.hug
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Jul 8, 2007 1:43 AM CST What's up with that?
lovely1971
lovely1971lovely1971Rosemount, Minnesota USA3 Threads 105 Posts
Yes...so true...but I don't wanna be the gal to get burned...been there...done that!
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Jul 8, 2007 1:47 AM CST What's up with that?
lovaboy
lovaboylovaboyBig Bad Manchester, Greater Manchester, England UK47 Threads 6,806 Posts
probably trying to heal their wounds by seeking some female attention....dunno
Not the right way to go about things....but hey....what can you do??..
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Jul 8, 2007 1:54 AM CST What's up with that?
trish123
trish123trish123Macclesfield, Cheshire, England UK177 Threads 4 Polls 13,724 Posts
I think there are lots of people on here, both men and women, at various stages of 'moving on' and this is a great place for people to share their hopes and fears and sometimes their disilusionments too.

Its a really good way to get get some feedback on how you are feeling and not to be so alone with your thoughts, to ask for help with these things isnt always easy but doing so shows a willingness to move on and to get beyond the things which still cause pain.

Its up to us to be cautious about engaging with a person, or not, who we consider may be carrying too much old baggage.

just my 2 pennorth wave
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Jul 8, 2007 3:43 AM CST What's up with that?
JustLookin81
JustLookin81JustLookin81A hole in the wall, Washington USA12 Threads 246 Posts
REBOUND! thats what it comes down to. Some people just cant tollerate being alone long enough, and if you really talk to them you realize its not just one ex theyre not over, its a LOT... KWIM?
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Jul 8, 2007 7:40 AM CST What's up with that?
LostInIndiana
LostInIndianaLostInIndianaSouth Bend, Indiana USA2 Threads 292 Posts
For some, it may be a need to get over a feeling of failure, or rejection....by being able to interact and see if someone else can be attracted to them, it lessens the negative feelings a bit. But allowing themselves to get caught up in another relationship right away is usually a basis for failure.

Personally, I am not ready for involvement on that type of level, due to the recent past .... my reason for being here is simply to meet people from other areas and learn a bit.
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Jul 8, 2007 7:52 AM CST What's up with that?
johnmarkus
johnmarkusjohnmarkustoronto, Canada34 Threads 1,384 Posts
They are looking for replacements and than will compare the new person to their ex since we all have some of the same traits since we are all human.canada
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Jul 9, 2007 11:32 AM CST What's up with that?
lovely1971
lovely1971lovely1971Rosemount, Minnesota USA3 Threads 105 Posts
Thanks everybody....You all have quite a bit of insight in this area...I was thinking maybe it is just me...that I attract the wrong type of guys.
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