I have come across several men here who are still not over their exes....so why are they here looking for love? I understand it is difficult getting over someone you had a connection with, but why is it a person decides to find someone else before they have moved on????
Is it fair to the new person to start something before finishing the last?
I have found the same thing here and other sites. I have dated some men not over there ex's, its not a good thing to get involved with anyone still living in the past and not moving on unless you are a patient person and can help them thru it. Maybe thats what they think they are doing is moving on by dating others. Sometimes people do need others love and support to move on I believe.
I think there are lots of people on here, both men and women, at various stages of 'moving on' and this is a great place for people to share their hopes and fears and sometimes their disilusionments too.
Its a really good way to get get some feedback on how you are feeling and not to be so alone with your thoughts, to ask for help with these things isnt always easy but doing so shows a willingness to move on and to get beyond the things which still cause pain.
Its up to us to be cautious about engaging with a person, or not, who we consider may be carrying too much old baggage.
JustLookin81A hole in the wall, Washington USA246 posts
REBOUND! thats what it comes down to. Some people just cant tollerate being alone long enough, and if you really talk to them you realize its not just one ex theyre not over, its a LOT... KWIM?
For some, it may be a need to get over a feeling of failure, or rejection....by being able to interact and see if someone else can be attracted to them, it lessens the negative feelings a bit. But allowing themselves to get caught up in another relationship right away is usually a basis for failure.
Personally, I am not ready for involvement on that type of level, due to the recent past .... my reason for being here is simply to meet people from other areas and learn a bit.
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Is it fair to the new person to start something before finishing the last?
Is this common?????