TEACHER: Maria, go to the map and find North America. MARIA: Here it is. TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America? CLASS: Maria. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TEACHER: Why are you late Frank? FRANK: Because of the sign. TEACHER: What sign? FRANK: The one that says, 'School ahead. Go slow.' ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TEACHER: John, why are you doing your multiplication on the floor? JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TEACHER: Greg, how would you spell 'crocodile?' GREG: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L TEACHER: No Greg, that's incorrect. GREG: Maybe it's incorrect, but you asked me how 'I' spelled it. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TEACHER: Ryan, what is the chemical formula for water? RYAN: H I J K L M N O TEACHER: Ryan, what are you talking about? RYAN: Well, yesterday you said it was H to O. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TEACHER: Hunter, name one important thing that we have today that we didn't have 10 years ago. HUNTER: Me ! ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TEACHER: Adam, why do you always get so dirty? ADAM: Well, I guess it's because I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TEACHER: Beth, give me a sentence starting with 'I'. BETH: I is........... TEACHER: No Beth.....Always say 'I am'.....not 'I is'. BETH: All right.........'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.' ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now Alex, do you know why his father didn't punish him? ALEX: Because George still had the ax in his hand. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TEACHER: Now, Macy, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating? MACY: No Mam, I don't have to. My Mom is a good cook. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TEACHER: Daniel, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's composition. Did you copy off of him? DANIEL: No teacher, it's the same dog. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ TEACHER: Parker, what do you call a person who keeps on talking to people who are no longer interested? PARKER: A Teacher.
TEACHER: Daniel, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's composition. Did you copy off of him? DANIEL: No teacher, it's the same dog.
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MARIA: Here it is.
TEACHER: Correct. Now class, who discovered America?
CLASS: Maria.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TEACHER: Why are you late Frank?
FRANK: Because of the sign.
TEACHER: What sign?
FRANK: The one that says, 'School ahead. Go slow.'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your multiplication
on the floor?
JOHN: You told me to do it without using tables.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TEACHER: Greg, how would you spell 'crocodile?'
GREG: K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L
TEACHER: No Greg, that's incorrect.
GREG: Maybe it's incorrect, but you asked me how 'I' spelled it.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TEACHER: Ryan, what is the chemical formula for water?
RYAN: H I J K L M N O
TEACHER: Ryan, what are you talking about?
RYAN: Well, yesterday you said it was H to O.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TEACHER: Hunter, name one important thing that we have today that we didn't have 10 years ago.
HUNTER: Me !
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TEACHER: Adam, why do you always get so dirty?
ADAM: Well, I guess it's because I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TEACHER: Beth, give me a sentence starting with 'I'.
BETH: I is...........
TEACHER: No Beth.....Always say 'I am'.....not 'I is'.
BETH: All right.........'I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.'
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree, but also admitted it. Now Alex, do you know why his father didn't punish him?
ALEX: Because George still had the ax in his hand.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TEACHER: Now, Macy, tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
MACY: No Mam, I don't have to. My Mom is a good cook.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TEACHER: Daniel, your composition on 'My Dog' is exactly the same as your brother's composition. Did you copy off of him?
DANIEL: No teacher, it's the same dog.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
TEACHER: Parker, what do you call a person who keeps on
talking to people who are no longer interested?
PARKER: A Teacher.