Panda. (4)

A Panda walks into a restaurant and orders the special of the day.

He eats the food, gets up and shoots the waitress dead.

The Hostess runs over to the Panda and says, "What did you do that for?"

The Panda then says,"Look up 'Panda" in the dictionary, and you will see..."

And with that, the Panda walked out of the restaurant.

The hostess then rushes to a dictionary, looks up

'Panda' and reads..."Panda, n., mammal, eats shoots and leaves."

A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money decided to hire herself out as a
handywoman and started canvassing the neighbourhoods.

She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had
any odd jobs for her to do.

"Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch," he said. "How much
will you charge me?"

The blonde quickly responded, "How about $50?"

The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would need was
in the garage.

The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, "Does she
realize that our porch goes all the way around the house?"

He responded, "That's a bit cynical, isn't it?"

The wife replied, "You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe all those
dumb blonde jokes ."

A short time later, the blonde handywoman came to the door to collect her
money. "You finished already?" the husband asked.

"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint leftover, so I gave it two coats
- no extra charge."

Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50 and handed it to
her.


"And by the way," the blonde added ... "it's not a Porch -- it's an Audi."