Men are from Mars Women are from Venus (75)
In response to: Theres no right and wrong too fast or too slow it just depends on the 2 people involved and only they can decide what and when things happen. And no one should say thats not quick its slow unless they are in the situation with you!!
So if anyone gives ya grief send them to me I'll sort them out ha ha
So if anyone gives ya grief send them to me I'll sort them out ha ha
I agree with you Sinead, everyone moves at their own pace and when it's comfortable with them.
kidatheart: I agree with you Sinead, everyone moves at their own pace and when it's comfortable with them.
Yes and when you are both ready you can move as fast or as slow as you like
In response to: Yes and when you are both ready you can move as fast or as slow as you like
mmmmm..some things are best done slowly...long and drawn out.
Fast can be fun too though!
kidatheart: mmmmm..some things are best done slowly...long and drawn out.
Fast can be fun too though!
Fast can be fun too though!
Yes slowly
then faster
Pete31: We all have our own pace anyway, so we've just got to find someone similar.
YEA, what he said
Pete31: We all have our own pace anyway, so we've just got to find someone similar.
I disagree that we need to find someone similar. It can rule out potential good partners. I would say that two people can have a different pace but they need to find a common speed.
I think it's a little bit of what everyone has said...we need to pick someone, some what similar to ourselves, but not completely, we need time together and we need space, we need to accept that we sometimes think different, and that sometimes we think alike. I think time has to go by in a relationship and trust has to be built in order to create...love....and I think unresolved issues in ourselves can sometimes screw that up, but I also think sometimes love can survive peoples unreasolved issues if it is real love. I think some people need books like this, and some don't. All I know, is that for me, it helped or so I think/hope it will. ......
Godsgift: Burry that stuff and it will come back to bite ya on the bum. Has to be dealt with and that's why these books were written.
Buried as in not a part of the relationship, got rid of from the equation, does not exist. Not as in hidden.
No one has to nag, cling have low self esteem, and everyone can have a fullfilled life by themselves. you just have to be open to sharing your life with someone and to accept and give unconditional love with someone you trust.
trapr: As one of the 2.x million men in Ireland I will answer this based on my own experiences.
I have lived with an ex and we basically spent all of our free time together. Space was needed as two people in a one bed flat does not go. Also it gets too intense. We did everything together. I swear that will never happen again. It is a recipe for disaster. Both parties need to spend time apart doing their own thing. Each needs time with their friends alone too.
Another experience....the ex that was constantly contacting me. I couldn't leave her for an hour without a text or phonecall. I couldn't ever go out with mates without a barrage of texts and calls. This will never happen again as the next woman to do that will be kicked to the side quick time.
My experiences have moulded me into who I am. I need space. I don't want to be at anyones beck and call 24 hours a day. It is too intense. I am not saying not to be in contact as my experiences seem to be quite extreme. I am not saying to ignore for days but I am saying that both parties need some time apart too.
I have lived with an ex and we basically spent all of our free time together. Space was needed as two people in a one bed flat does not go. Also it gets too intense. We did everything together. I swear that will never happen again. It is a recipe for disaster. Both parties need to spend time apart doing their own thing. Each needs time with their friends alone too.
Another experience....the ex that was constantly contacting me. I couldn't leave her for an hour without a text or phonecall. I couldn't ever go out with mates without a barrage of texts and calls. This will never happen again as the next woman to do that will be kicked to the side quick time.
My experiences have moulded me into who I am. I need space. I don't want to be at anyones beck and call 24 hours a day. It is too intense. I am not saying not to be in contact as my experiences seem to be quite extreme. I am not saying to ignore for days but I am saying that both parties need some time apart too.
same here. If I wanted someone constantly at my heels I'd buy a dog.
If I want space to think, then if you care about me or the relationship at all, you'll give it me. And if you dont then you've lost me anyway.
You won't spend your time moaning about this 'cos you will be off doing your own thing with your mates, your life, your interests....
Jesus that would be really atrractive in a bloke - loving me but not been obsessive.
And he would also know when I rang him to say "if your free tonigh pick me up" he would know I'd thought and made the choice to still be in a relationship with him. Its the old saying if you love someone let them go, if they come back then they love you too.... BUT if you tie them up you're just making hate and contemp in the relationship. Be free folks
trapr: As one of the 2.x million men in Ireland I will answer this based on my own experiences.
I have lived with an ex and we basically spent all of our free time together. Space was needed as two people in a one bed flat does not go. Also it gets too intense. We did everything together. I swear that will never happen again. It is a recipe for disaster. Both parties need to spend time apart doing their own thing. Each needs time with their friends alone too.
Another experience....the ex that was constantly contacting me. I couldn't leave her for an hour without a text or phonecall. I couldn't ever go out with mates without a barrage of texts and calls. This will never happen again as the next woman to do that will be kicked to the side quick time.
My experiences have moulded me into who I am. I need space. I don't want to be at anyones beck and call 24 hours a day. It is too intense. I am not saying not to be in contact as my experiences seem to be quite extreme. I am not saying to ignore for days but I am saying that both parties need some time apart too.
I have lived with an ex and we basically spent all of our free time together. Space was needed as two people in a one bed flat does not go. Also it gets too intense. We did everything together. I swear that will never happen again. It is a recipe for disaster. Both parties need to spend time apart doing their own thing. Each needs time with their friends alone too.
Another experience....the ex that was constantly contacting me. I couldn't leave her for an hour without a text or phonecall. I couldn't ever go out with mates without a barrage of texts and calls. This will never happen again as the next woman to do that will be kicked to the side quick time.
My experiences have moulded me into who I am. I need space. I don't want to be at anyones beck and call 24 hours a day. It is too intense. I am not saying not to be in contact as my experiences seem to be quite extreme. I am not saying to ignore for days but I am saying that both parties need some time apart too.
Thanks Trapr for your answer ... i lived with an ex too and totally agree with you, its not a good idea, too little time alone is better than too much...i spent 3 yrs with someone who i only saw once or twice a week and loved that just as much ... i definitely want my own space to do my own thing and often i just want to be alone
Of course you cant constantly contact someone, you dont do it to your mother or friend who youve known all your life so why would you do it with a person who is new in your life
But i find men leave women hanging and they enjoy that which isnt fair...instead of saying chat to you tonight or see you thursday they leave the woman wondering what the hell is going on and shes left wondering if hes interested or not ... from my experience and from what ive been told by friends
little_miss: Thanks Trapr for your answer ... i lived with an ex too and totally agree with you, its not a good idea, too little time alone is better than too much...i spent 3 yrs with someone who i only saw once or twice a week and loved that just as much ... i definitely want my own space to do my own thing and often i just want to be alone
Of course you cant constantly contact someone, you dont do it to your mother or friend who youve known all your life so why would you do it with a person who is new in your life
But i find men leave women hanging and they enjoy that which isnt fair...instead of saying chat to you tonight or see you thursday they leave the woman wondering what the hell is going on and shes left wondering if hes interested or not ... from my experience and from what ive been told by friends
Of course you cant constantly contact someone, you dont do it to your mother or friend who youve known all your life so why would you do it with a person who is new in your life
But i find men leave women hanging and they enjoy that which isnt fair...instead of saying chat to you tonight or see you thursday they leave the woman wondering what the hell is going on and shes left wondering if hes interested or not ... from my experience and from what ive been told by friends
you,ll only be left hanging if you allow yourself to be.. ..went he doesn,t contact you ..you contact him ...simple ....an if he,s playing a game ... then let him play it on his own
boredguy: you,ll only be left hanging if you allow yourself to be.. ..went he doesn,t contact you ..you contact him ...simple ....an if he,s playing a game ... then let him play it on his own
ha true i am learning, youre a wise man
i guess age brought that onoh that one hurt 
....yes yes i,m old an senile its true 
hi ho ...its of to work we go....
....yes yes i,m old an senile its true hi ho ...its of to work we go....
little_miss: Thanks Trapr for your answer
You are very welcome. It is good to talk as we can all learn from each other
= 
little_miss: ... i lived with an ex too and totally agree with you, its not a good idea, too little time alone is better than too much...i spent 3 yrs with someone who i only saw once or twice a week and loved that just as much ... i definitely want my own space to do my own thing and often i just want to be alone
Of course you cant constantly contact someone, you dont do it to your mother or friend who youve known all your life so why would you do it with a person who is new in your life
Of course you cant constantly contact someone, you dont do it to your mother or friend who youve known all your life so why would you do it with a person who is new in your life
I honestly thought that you were against space from your first post. I am glad I understand now. You are dead right. People special to you so far are given space (family/friends). If you meet someone and want them to be special in the future, they need the same as people from the past got.
little_miss: But i find men leave women hanging and they enjoy that which isnt fair...instead of saying chat to you tonight or see you thursday they leave the woman wondering what the hell is going on and shes left wondering if hes interested or not ... from my experience and from what ive been told by friends
Number 1 requirement for any woman contacting me is no games. Life is too short for them they show lack of respect. I believe that people should be thought what you think and feel. It saves so much hassle. At the start things might be a bit more relaxed on the contact front maybe due to nerves, afraid of appearing possessive and fear of scaring the other person off. But that fades after a little while.
More Threads
Don Shits-In-Pants!!!
your personality
Feel Good Music
How far is too far?
The Best of the GOP
other can see but not you
rarotonga
Common Issues with the BMW X1
Happy Birthday MysteriousGirl80
1830's Music
More Threads
Report threads that break rules, are offensive, or contain fighting. Staff may not be aware of the forum abuse, and cannot do anything about it unless you tell us about it. click to report forum abuse »
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
If one of the comments is offensive, please report the comment instead (there is a link in each comment to report it).
ah i know i go on abit about the