MWalden Blog Comments (4)

RE: WHY

I am afraid it is partially the curse of the normal and partially our society today. The Curse of the Normal simply means that women, like men, can and do get bored with things. Women, like men, enjoy the thrill of the chase and the adrenaline rush of the hunt. Problem is, once she has you, that all settles down and life becomes normal again. Who knows why it happens. Maybe they like the thought of being chased after or chasing. Maybe they set their sights on a particular man who seems unobtainable and once they have him, the allure is gone because there is no challenge.
Our society plays a part in this because we are all about instant gratification now. We want what we want when we want it and nothing less will do. Men and women are not into things that take time anymore, it's like going through the drive thru in a restaurant. Get what you ordered, pay for it and be on your way. Why do you suppose divorces are up as high as they are today? It's because people have lost interest in developing a lasting relationship and want instant gratification. There is no attention span anymore past a few dates before the mystique is gone and it's time to move on. I know it, I've seen all too many times. Just go to a local bar or club known to be a "pick up" spot and you will see what I mean.
People get bored with the known and are fascinated by the unknown and unfamiliar. If they can get it and get it fast to satisfy a desire that they have quickly, it's a win/win in their minds. To be sure, not everyone is this way and there are still plenty of us around who believe in taking time to nurture a relationship and watch it grow but there is an alarming number of those as I have described above. Best thing to do is take your time and ask questions. If she seems antsy or wants to start something right away, you have one of the people I am talking about and you shouldn't waste your time. Hope that gives some perspective.

RE: hi all

Derema,
Life is a journey. We each travel down a road towards our final destination. Where that is or what that is, nobody is sure. Along the way in our travels, people's paths cross our own and they seem to come to us when we need to learn something or understand something better to grow. For example, in my own life, I met the woman who was my wife for 13 years. We walked together on the journey through life and through her and our marriage, I learned many things. I learned compassion, tolerance, love of someone else besides self, esteem, closeness, giving of one's self and other things. When our children were born, I learned how to be a parent, the importance of nuturing and guiding a little person to be a great adult and enjoy their journey, patience, understanding, unconditional love. I learned so very much and continue to learn everyday.
Although my journey with the mother of my children is over, my children walk with me as we make our journey. Others have come to me along the way and there will be more over the years to come who will come into my life and out of my life as I make this journey. Each will teach me something, some will just make the trip less lonely. Some will test me and some will have very little time with me but leave a lasting impression or impart some knowledge to me I didn't have before.
The key to a happy life is to wake each new day and take the journey as it comes. Listen to the people that you meet, they have been sent to you for a reason. Learn all that you can from them and the world around you. Take the things that enrich your life to heart and learn from the things that test your true self. Through your interactions, you will find people who will give you guidance and direction. Along the way, you will meet a select few who will come to mean so much in your life. Savor the time you have with them and make every moment count for something. If you do that, you will achieve the happiness we all seek but in a way that is personal to you. I hope that helps a bit. Guess I was guided to your post because this is where you and I were meant to be at this time and in this place. See how it all works? Take care and safe journey.

A Journal Of A Traveller Down Life's Road

Good suggestions however, pets are not something that I have time for so to have one would not be fair because I could not devote the time to them that they need. Cats, not a big fan of cats, LOL. I am not really looking so much as it bothers me to establish a new relationship, such as a friendship, and then see that person just disappear without even so much as a reason or good bye. It causes one to wonder what is so wrong with me that these people particularly don't seem to want to hang around.
As to being worried my friend. Far from it. Troubled, yes. Questioning, yes but not worried about it. I realize that people will come and go as we journey on our path. The things that cause me angst are the ones who come and then leave so quickly and without me knowing why. I have just learned to accept that they were here and now gone and continue my journey. This is merely a recounting of things I have learned and interactions I have had.
I do appreciate your comments though my friend. Advice from a fellow traveller is never shunned or dismissed but appreciated and kept for future use. Thanks again and safe journey to you on your travels.

A Journal Of A Traveller Down Life's Road

While sitting at a local pub one night, I was feeling very sorry for myself. I was bitter, alone, no friends to cheer me and thinking to myself what is the point in this life. If we feel love but love continually eludes us, how are we to experience it and become the truly balanced people we are destined to be. Questions but no answers came to my mind. As I began to depress myself to the point where Guiness was not helping to dull the pain, I picked up the remains of my meal I had partially eaten packed away in its styrofoam container and began to walk home.
As I was leaving, a woman blocked my path and told me I could not leave. She was, by her own accounting, a matchmaker and was there that night sponsoring a fling for single friends that she was trying to help find that special someone. All of this seemed too surreal, too bizarre for my mind now clouded with drink to fully understand.
I humored this woman who I thought was very nice and at the same time very beautiful. She had a smile that made you feel better, eyes that lit up when she spoke and a laugh that was contagious. She was outgoing, energetic, pleasant and just a fun person to be around. As the night neared its end, she left with her friends and we did not speak again until I happened to run into a woman who was friends with her and told me how to contact her. I did and she began to establish a friendship. We talked, she would text me little things to say goodnight and things of that nature and I would respond.
Time went on and I could not get this woman out of my mind. I would suddenly see her face in my mind and not have the slightest clue as to how or why. The opportunity came for me some time later to tell her this and she thought she would like to get to know me better and that maybe we should go out sometime. I was content with that and with a new friendship that I thought might actually be a wonderful addition to my life. A companion on the journey would be a truly happy event in my life but again, it was not to be.
As time went on, her contact with me became less frequent and then stopped. I texted her admittedly at a late hour a couple of times but not with anything off color or rude, just to say goodnight and once to ask for a photo to be sent to my phone. I went to Facebook and found her not among my friends and not listed anywhere on the site. I had been blocked and dropped as a friend. This cruel pattern was continuing and I still have not figured out why. I am not actively seeking romance, I am not going out of my way to start a relationship with any woman. Women just seem to drop in, stay with me for a brief while and then leave either angry or not saying anything at all. This event especially hurt me.
A friend said to me that it isn't me, it's the people doing the leaving. Another said it is a sign of the times in which we live. I am not sure what the answer is but although I will continue my journey to see it to its end, I now conclude that I am to do that alone and I accept that as my lot in life and my path on this journey. It is said that it is better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all. That may be true in a metaphysical sense but in reality, to have never loved might be the better course. Once you have had that in your life, it is hard to live without it. It sustains your spirit and your soul and when you have to be without it, your soul starves and begins to crave it all the more.
I may wind up finishing this journey alone to see it through to its end. I do not have the advantage of knowledge of the future so it is unclear to me and no real signs have been given on my path that I recognize unless you count these three incidents I have mentioned here. If that is the case, those are truly ominous omens that do not instill confidence. Whatever the case, My journey continues and maybe there is a woman who will accept me as I am and love me nonetheless. Time will tell.