A travel agent looked up from his desk and saw an older lady and an older gentleman peering into the shop window, where there were posters of glamorous destinations around the world. The agent had had a good week, and the dejected couple looking in the window gave him a rare feeling of generosity. He called them into his shop.
"I know that on your pension you could never hope to have a holiday, so I am sending you to a fabulous resort at my expense, and I won't take no for an answer."
He took them inside and asked his secretary to write two flight tickets and book a room in a five-star hotel. The older lady and gentleman, as could be expected, gladly accepted and were off!
About a month later, the little lady came in to the travel agency.
"And how did you like your holiday?" the agent asked eagerly.
"The flight was exciting, and the room was lovely," she said. "I've come to thank you. But, one thing puzzled me. Who was that old guy I had to share the room with?"
The missus bought a Paperback, Down Shepton Mallet way, I had a look inside her bag; T'was "Fifty Shades of Grey". Well I just left her to it, And then I went to bed. An hour later she appeared; The sight filled me with dread... In her left she held a rope; And in her right a whip! She threw them down upon the floor, And then began to strip. Well fifty years or so ago; I might have had a peek; But Mabel hasn't weathered well; She's eighty four next week!! Watching Mabel bump and grind; Could not have been much grimmer. And things then went from bad to worse; She toppled off her Zimmer! She struggled back upon her feet; A couple minutes later; She put her teeth back in and said I am a dominator !! Now if you knew our Mabel, You'd see just why I spluttered, I'd spent two months in traction For the last complaint I'd uttered. She stood there rude and naked Bent forward just a bit I went to hold her, sensual like and stood on her left xxx! Mabel screamed, her teeth shot out; My God what had I done!? She moaned and groaned then shouted out: "Step on the other one"!! Well readers, I can't tell no more; About what occurred that day. Suffice to say my jet black hair, Turned fifty shades of grey.
''Mrs. Saunders, this is Doctor Jones at the Bridgegate Surgery. When we sent your husband's biopsy to the lab last week, a biopsy from another Mr. Saunders was sent as well.
We are now uncertain which one belongs to your husband. Frankly, either way, the results are not too good."
''What do you mean?" Mrs. Saunders asks nervously.
"Well, one of the specimens tested positive for Alzheimer's and the other one tested positive for HIV(AIDS). We can't tell which is which."
''That's dreadful! Can you do the test again?" questioned Mrs. Saunders.
"Normally we could, but following the NHS cuts, the NHS will only pay for these expensive tests once."
''Well, what am I supposed to do now?"
''The NHS recommend that you drop your husband off somewhere in the middle oftown. If he finds his way home, don't sleep with him."
LongTallSally11 Forum Posts (201)
Senior Travel
A travel agent looked up from his desk and saw an older lady and an older gentleman peering into the shop window, where there were posters of glamorous destinations around the world. The agent had had a good week, and the dejected couple looking in the window gave him a rare feeling of generosity. He called them into his shop."I know that on your pension you could never hope to have a holiday, so I am sending you to a fabulous resort at my expense, and I won't take no for an answer."
He took them inside and asked his secretary to write two flight tickets and book a room in a five-star hotel. The older lady and gentleman, as could be expected, gladly accepted and were off!
About a month later, the little lady came in to the travel agency.
"And how did you like your holiday?" the agent asked eagerly.
"The flight was exciting, and the room was lovely," she said. "I've come to thank you. But, one thing puzzled me. Who was that old guy I had to share the room with?"