Okay leaving your very unfair generalization of Muslim men aside, I say marry who ever you fall in love with (and the love mutual and returned). There will be cultural differences, but how you chose to deal with them determines the outcome. Many of us wouldn't be walking around if our parents didn't decide to chose love over cultural differences (myself included). If you don't want to put in the work to maintain the relationship, then don't consider it.
2 months is nothing. I'm pretty sure I've been a member for over a year; I don't even get contacted by scammers. At least I can get a read from the blogs and the forums. And lots of good laughs. There are a few nice people who hang out around here. Yes there is a crap load of jerks but the ones who are nice seem genuine. Sorry couldn't offer you hope.
I had an interesting conversation with a couple of dudes regarding the "Why hasn't he called?" question. It was pretty funny and very insightful. Just want to know from the guys (and gals) your answer to the question.
Here were some of the responses:
-I lost it -I was drunk when I asked for...the next day I had no idea who the person was, so I wasn't going to call -I just asked to be nice -I waited too long and it's probably too late to call -She probably only gave it to me to be nice -Someone dared me -It's an ego thing...I like seeing how many numbers I can collect in one night
I know I know! But I had a plan. I was going to squat at Francis Ford Coppola's vineyard during the weekend. Drink all the wine that I could and steal picnic baskets. I'd be to wasted to care about the men LOL!
Hey MB!! I remember you too! I went MIA because I took a second job doing one of my hobbies..I was getting paid and having fun. You can't beat that right? It kept me out the house and allowed me to meet great new people. Hopefully this time around on CS will be better...but I see the scammers are still alive and well as they proceed to jam my mailbox.
I am still positive because I know negativity is not an attractive trait. I am still a bit hopeful too
I am having surgery to have the foot problem corrected next week! HAHAHAH!
Funny thing you mentioned SF, it was my first choice city to move. I LOVE that place however it the cost of living was the same as NYC and I could not afford to own. I love San Fran...so damn close to Napa! The greatest weather on Earth( in my opinion).
I see where this is going...*sigh* basic comprehension is all I ask.
If you need me to elaborate any section of my post I will gladly do it. As indicated I my VERY LONG essay, I am not willingly remaining single only to come here and create this discussion. If I was WILLINGLY trying to remain single, then why would I express my great desire not to be? I am pretty sure I was VERY clear about that in my original post.
It also seems that you came into my post looking for an argument...I way to tired.
Thanks for the welcome! I've actually been a member for a while and this isn't my first forum interaction BUT it is my first forum rant. I will take you advice and have my profile reviewed...I didn't know about that feature!
Okay I have no idea what you are trying to convey in this message. Also why are you projecting your insecurities on me/my post. What does you IQ have to do with anything? My brain allows me to be fully aware that no one pushes me to be single.
I deleted my photo right after I posted this because I wanted an updated one.
I am positive I am commited to finding someone. It's been 9 years. I've asked others to observe my behaviour...to see if there is something about me that seems standoffish or not available. The general feedback is positive.
I've been single for 9 years and frankly I just sick and tired of it. My last boyfriend was almost 10 years ago. Once that ended I "found" myself, found out what I like & what I won't put up with. I seem to be a magnet for unavailable men and men who want to have their cake and eat it too. I am not in any rush to jump into a relationship, but I want it to be an option. I have no desire to be a FWB or the unaware third party of a love triangle. I thank them for their honesty & shut those down immediately. With that said, I can count how many dates I've been on in the last 5 years on one hand. Every year when I catch up with my friends and they ask that dreaded question, "So are you seeing anyone special?" My answer is always no and I quickly change the subject. I have a sinking feeling that my family also thinks I am a lesbian because of this. My dad jokingly said he has given up on having grand kids. I know they mean well & they would love me regardless, but I am not lesbian. My parents don't even ask about my love life anymore.
I take pride that I have a healthy dose of self esteem and confidence instilled in me by my wonderful parents. So I know these two things are not the issues. I am generally happy, can obviously enjoy my own company and have a good amount of self-love. I am an extrovert and I have no problems being in new settings. I end up meeting someone who shares an interest anyway. I try to smile, be welcoming, be engaging. I also have observed how women who desperately want to be in a relationship act, and trust me I no where like them. They scare me and I can see why they scare men! I don't brag about myself or talk about how great I am. I am a bit overweight but started working on that in March because lower back pains. I've lost 30 pounds so far and I am working hard at it. But I was smaller than I am before and still didn't spark anyone's interest. I don't think weight isn't my issue here as people of all shapes and sizes meet others who think they are great. Looks wise, I think I am cute..but everyone has their own interpretations.
At first I thought I was being super picky or unrealistic in the things I want in someone. But I don't think I have impossible expectations: Intelligent (IQ or education does not measure this). Ambitious, career/goal oriented, has short term and long term goals, self-sustaining, believes in something bigger than themselves, worldly, respectful of other cultures, adventurous, kind. Understands why family and friendships are important.
I've tried online dating and my friends are no help. Singles events,and groups that share my varied interests. It doesn't help that I moved to a city with an 8 to 1 women to men ratio (and a huge gay male population). There might be men out there, but I don't have the right anatomy, and competition is very stiff. I've met so many single men who know they are a hot commodity because of this ratio. Men will let you know that if I won't deal with his shortcomings, there are 7 others who will. I never want to be that girl and I have no plans to start. I would love to move out this place, but the present state of the economy won't allow it.
I haven't been actively looking this entire time. But is looking always a bad thing? I think I've paid my dues to singledom. I got a dog to keep me company last year, I think she is starting of get sick of me. After a while it gets tiring doing things alone when your friends have plans. Traveling, eating and going to the movies alone isn't much fun anymore. I've had a relationship with myself for 9 yrs and I think something else could benefit from my corny jokes, my cooking, my generosity, my outlook. Most people I know have never been single for such a long period of time so I don't really feel they can relate. Thoughts?
This reminds me of story I read not to long ago about White flight and non whites moving into predominantly white areas. It is eerily similar how that made some people nervous....
azucarmorena Forum Posts (1,001)
but thank you for the suggestion!
RE: We are a family CS Family … have u ever feel that ?