Sometimes if one person, and it can be either male or female, child or adult, exhibits passive aggressive behavior ( tuning out, not following through as promised, seeming not to care etc.) they are really being the person who is not holding up their end of the relationship. If the passive agressive behavior goes on long enough, people around the person who is not working or following through will start to get upset and keep asking for follow through. Soon it looks like the asker is mean and nagging while the passive aggressive person gets to look very calm and reasonable. In actuality, the passive aggressive person has not communicated, not followed through and acted irresponsibly. They are stuffing their anger instead of talking about it or trying to work out something with the person requesting help. By not facing their own lack of follow through and lack of communication, they create the scenario of being a victim to "terrible" people around them. Those tuning out need to take a close look into themselves and find out where their reactions came from and how to quit blaming the person who is asking them for something. They may have that reaction to somebody as an adult, but they really had issues long ago that they haven't solved. If a person who behaves like this will not continue to look at themselves, guaranteed they will find this scenario replaying for the rest of their life with many other people. They need to look inward to solve this issue. . . not outward. Both people in the relationship need to keep working on themselves by doing personal work and commit to really talking to one another and working out solutions.
I find I have a lot of small, physical symbols come to me when I need help most of all. For examples, for the last couple of years, I have seemed to look at the clock just when an 11 is showing. It seemed that other 11s would be everywhere I looked. For a while this freaked me out. Then I would see that after a while a big project I was working on or a great desire I longed for were coming to fruition. After I reached the destination, the 11s would be gone for a while. Finally I put two and two (or maybe in this case, one and one) together to realize that the 11s were a symbol of help and support being extedned to me, especially during times I didn't feel supported.
During the time of my divorce, I found feather after feather after feather every time I was outside. Now, I've loved to spend time outside all my life, but never have I found so MANY feathers. I didn't think the birds in my area could all be having a hard time. It happened every place I went, even far from home. In winter, this even continued at work and I would find feathers from down coats or children's art projects. The feathers came in all shapes and sizes. I put them in a big 2 quart glass jar and there are more besides those too. I felt that they were indicating that I would have a safe flight to my next destination and a soft landing too. Once in meditation, I heard that the feathers were affirmations. After that, whenever I found one, I made sure to say a positive affirmation regarding the way I wnated the rest of my life to go.
It sounds like you had a very long and difficult divorce. Mine has not been that long, but many issues have been bubbling under the surface all along. So much needed to be brought out into the open and never has. These things now have no chance to be healed and to benefit our daughters. Some of the actions that he has taken have affected my daughters' opinions of me in a negative way but that actually started years ago. I am most anxious to show my daughters who I am in the absence of what we all have lived with for so many years. I know things take time. . .
My position is just to keep working on myself because that is the part I can control and am responsible for.
I'll bet you do. . . and it can't be a good one. I'm sorry for your loss. She was lucky to have you support her throughout her whole life.
I haven't experienced anyone that close to me dying from lung cancer but I have a student who has told me how her family was affected by the death of her father to lung cancer. He was also a smoker. It was very difficult for all the kids and the mom of my student as well after he died. The good thing that came out of it was that the girls have spoken at their schools to let other students know how smoking and a death from lung cancer can affect the others in the family.
I have heard that frequently, just after a divorce becomes final, issues between the ex-spouses flare up. I am coming up to my final divorce date in about 2 1/2 weeks so I am wondering, what do you all know about this? What is the healthiest thing for me to do to protect myself emotionally and also to make sure that my teenage daughter stays free of potential issues between us.
I wrote a reply to this the other night but I guess it didn't send correctly. I would love to know where this park is because it sounds beautiful.
I love to take my camera along to capture the details, close up and distance of the colors, plants and animals if they would stay still long enough or if I photograph fast enough. I have lots of leaf and mushroom photos that are among my favorites.
Last year about this time, I watched a robin build a nest in a birch tree, all in one day. Soon there will be buds on the bushes that will look like a fine green mist was sprayed all over the branches.
Well, I'm just now reading this and it made me laugh out loud! I'm not offended! ( I was raised a pretty common Christian religion too.)
I usually have given up on reading most forum posting because of the intense competition to be "right" or to put another in his or her "place".
I never want to offend someone about their religious beliefs but personally, I have enough uptight situations in my life that I am enjoying laughing and relaxing a little right now.
I believe you were given a great gift to see your future dream coming true. It seems to me that you believe in it enough to manifest all parts of it. Spiritual help is abundant. I think maybe your dreams are reminding you that your dream is indeed manifesting and speeding on its way to you. Of course we don't see it until the very last stage of manifestation when it becomes physical, but you already have the first part by having the cabin.
I wish you the best in attracting the perfect partner to share it with!
I love the woods and the lakes, especially up north. For those not from Wisconsin, I'd define that as area north of, say, Green Bay or so. I love how quiet it is, and how grounding all the nature around feels. I love sitting or lying outside and looking up at the stars and moon. . .you can really see them away from all the the lights of more populated areas.
I would say to trust your "gut" even if you have a tiny inkling something is not right. You can trust that inner knowing and learn to rely on it as a 100% accurate indicator of what is right for you and what is not. In my opinion even small concessions you make are instances where you give up a part of yourself. Over time all the small not-right things can add up. By being absolutely true to yourself, you will attract all that is really in alignment with what is right for you on all levels of your being.
I love the look and feel of the real log cabins. I almost bought one to revamp 2 years ago and fortunately the deal fell through because it sure needed a lot of work. I have been getting log cabin magazines for several years. I love to collect things about them that i would like in mine some day. Right now I have a small place up north but I don't know if by the time my divorce is final if I will be able to hang onto it. If not, I will look for another place. I love the feel of northern WI.
I am about a month new to this site. I'd love to talk about something positive and specific to Wisconsin. How about this: Does anybody own a log cabin or want to own one? We certainly have great woods and lakes up north for it.
You're welcome. Thanks for the clarification. It is a pleasure to talk about interesting topics like this one.
The blood type diet has not been out long. The first book I read about it is called Eat Right for Your Type. I won't try to spell the author and I have lent out my copy of the book so I can't look it up now. . . . OK. I'll try. . . something like Peter D'Addamo (?) Anyway, its premise is that each of the four different blood types, A, AB, B and O, has a particular list of foods that build optimal health for that type. Through lab tests of types various foods combined with the blood types the author has identified certain ones that cause inflamation because of their reaction to the given blood type in producing a coagulating type of substance. Over time these can build up in many places in the body causing various types of disease. His theory is that the origins of various peoples early on Earth and their naturally available diets set the stage for this.
I had the book sitting on my shelf for over a year intending to get to it. It had been recommended to me by so many people I respect. Meanwhile, I had a lingering left hand injury that did not heal for over a year and a half despite a whole gamut of traditional western and alternative/complimentary healing modes. As a violin teacher, I was starting to think that maybe the Universe was giving me the message to move on to another career since I could not play at all. Other factors were involved too, but I can tell you that just a short time after going on it the swelling and pain in my hand began to subside.
All my adult life I had trouble with certain foods. I had done elimination diets, allergy treatments, candida diets, organic, vegetarian,supplements and on and on, all trying to get better digestion. The more I studied complimentary health and became aware of the importance of proper diet for the immune system the more I concluded that my immune system must be less than optimal because of some thing I was doing. I felt bad that I couldn't figure it out. Finally, when I read this book, all the foods I knew I could not digest turned out to be on the "don't eat" list for my blood type. I was so relieved to find what had been causing over 3 decades of problems for me.
My favorite health care practitioner said that the O blood types respond fastest to this diet and I am one of them. The book, however, gives amazing stories of how the diet has helped each of the various blood types to clear different illnesses. I can't wait until the medical profession becomes familiar enough with this concept to use it widely. I think it is definitely worth reading for anyone who appreciates the natural balance of our bodies.
Some time soon I will write about what I have been studying and learning about flower essences.
Aloe is amazing for healing burns. Cut a leaf open and tape it on the burn. It may sting a tiny bit when the burn is fresh, but it will heal it up with very little pain left by the next day.
I'm also interested in plants for medicinal values. I am not an herbalist but I have done quite a bit of reading on it and do use herbs for nutrition and healing for myself and my children when they were growing up. I usually had some in the dehydrator or tincturing on my shelf somewhere most of the time. Now I am enjoying working with flower essences and have made several of my own.
Familiar plants make me feel comfortable too. I once traveled by car from Wisconsin south to Florida with my family. As I looked out the car windows, I realized that I did not know any of the native plants and began to feel very uneasy. In reality I probably would never have stopped on my way to Disney world to pick herbs to use but the experience taught me how tuned in to my surrounding flora I am!
Plants resonate so well in the body and I believe from what I've experienced and read that they create easily assimilated balance in our bodies, unlike that which can be achieved with synthetic products.
I am late getting on this discussion. I'm also pretty new to learning to post things so I hope this is right. Is it against policies of CS to list specific names of healing modes and/or remedies one is familiar with? I am wondering if there is more interest in having more conversation about the subject. I'd love to talk more about it with others. My personal favorite combination of complimentary healing techniques involves energy work, a particular set of flower essences I like and the blood type diet.
I also use thyroid medication but use one that is naturally derived, even though it is by prescription.
And what is the difference between a post and a thread if any?
I would encourage almost any child to study a second language, especially when young. Their brains are wired to learn language acquisition early. Even some exposure to the differing sounds and patterns of a foreign language will make it easier for them to learn that language as an adult if they so choose. As a teacher, I have seen many students blossom into experts at subjects they even "dabbled" in as younger kids when they start up again later. In my orchestra classroom, I see students who began music early succeed at faster rates later, even when they have set those studies aside for several years.
I'd also like to respond to the people who were talking about defining "advanced". I believe every person has areas in which they understand and absorb information easily and some in which they do not. This is true of even people who have learning disabilities or difficulties. In those areas in which learning is easy for individuals they learn faster and then we call them advanced. Different people have different amounts of the easily absorbed subject areas. Sometimes when someone has many areas in which they learn easily we call them smart, gifted or other similar terms.
hara11 Forum Posts (54)
RE: Victims of Nagging, & The Mantel Degradation they must Endure
Sometimes if one person, and it can be either male or female, child or adult, exhibits passive aggressive behavior ( tuning out, not following through as promised, seeming not to care etc.) they are really being the person who is not holding up their end of the relationship. If the passive agressive behavior goes on long enough, people around the person who is not working or following through will start to get upset and keep asking for follow through. Soon it looks like the asker is mean and nagging while the passive aggressive person gets to look very calm and reasonable. In actuality, the passive aggressive person has not communicated, not followed through and acted irresponsibly. They are stuffing their anger instead of talking about it or trying to work out something with the person requesting help. By not facing their own lack of follow through and lack of communication, they create the scenario of being a victim to "terrible" people around them. Those tuning out need to take a close look into themselves and find out where their reactions came from and how to quit blaming the person who is asking them for something. They may have that reaction to somebody as an adult, but they really had issues long ago that they haven't solved. If a person who behaves like this will not continue to look at themselves, guaranteed they will find this scenario replaying for the rest of their life with many other people. They need to look inward to solve this issue. . . not outward. Both people in the relationship need to keep working on themselves by doing personal work and commit to really talking to one another and working out solutions.