Thank you, Demonfairy! I received some sage advice from one of my men friends. He said to send my boyfriend a "Dear John" letter. My wise friend said it is always harder when you are the one that has been dumped, so I should do the dumping first. He said my boyfriend will either realize he lost the best thing that ever happened to him and want me back to start over; or he will just feel bad that he has lost someone he cared about. Either way, it will help save me a lot of pain.
I need to do this for my own sake, or it will destroy me.
I really feel your pain. I'm going through a similar situation. My boyfriend after 4 months put his profile back on CS and is looking again. I was crushed, as I loved him with all my heart and soul. He got what he wanted, and now he's looking for his next conquest. I asked his buddy, what the problem was, but all he could offer up was that soldiers(he's retired from the army after 24 years and is a contractor/trainer in the mideast.) who go through multiple tours of duty and see all the loss, have committment issues.
Well, I thought he was an honorable man, but I was wrong. He suddenly started to become very distant and rude to me. I am absolutely and utterly heartbroken. I have to let him go, or it will destroy me. He used me, and that is the worst thing you can do to another person.
In the meantime, I have met a very sweet and wonderful man, who challenges me intellectually, is kind, sweet, and very handsome to boot. So, life moves forward for me.
Please take care of yourself. Make sure you have a good support group of friends, and God Bless you. If you want to write to me, feel free. I really understand what you are going through. I'm in the chat room a lot, and there are many nice people who come in there on a regular basis.
My boyfriend who I was seeing decided to put his profile back on CS. I tried to ask him about it today, on the phone, and he brushed me off, and asked if we could talk about it in an hour. Well, an hour came and went. I started calling and saw that his line was busy. Finally, I got through to him and he had fallen asleep. He was so groggy, that I could hardly make out what he was saying. I said I would call back in the morning.
We have been communicating by phone, instant chat, and webcam for almost 4 months now. I had no indication that anything was wrong. He works in Kuwait as a contractor, and his job is extremely busy, with very long hours. I can understand why we might not speak as often, but the profile thing has me very worried. He said he took it offline, because he found me. I then took mine offline too. Well, last night I accidently clicked on the link to his profile in my favorites, and up popped his profile with new pictures.
We were supposed to meet this month in the states. He was coming home for a 10 day leave. Well, it's mid August, and he's still in Kuwait, and has a new profile.
I need to know for sure what's what. He owes me at least an explanation, and we should talk on the phone, not instant message. I want to be able to tell him exactly how I feel about him. He needs to know that I love him with all of my heart and soul. (This is what he will be giving up, a good woman who loves him completely, faults and all.) So, in a few hours, I will be talking to him again. I pray this is all a big misunderstanding. I have never in my life felt this completely in love with someone. And yes, I'm sure there are those that think you cannot fall in love online, but it happened to me. I thought he loved me too. I told him I loved him, and then asked him if he felt the same. He said, "Yes, I do."
SeriousToo Forum Posts (60)
RE: They say its harder to fine love..
Thank you, Demonfairy! I received some sage advice from one of my men friends. He said to send my boyfriend a "Dear John" letter. My wise friend said it is always harder when you are the one that has been dumped, so I should do the dumping first. He said my boyfriend will either realize he lost the best thing that ever happened to him and want me back to start over; or he will just feel bad that he has lost someone he cared about. Either way, it will help save me a lot of pain.I need to do this for my own sake, or it will destroy me.