Thursday, I got the news. Even when you know it's coming sooner or later, you don't really want it to come. My ex-wife's cancer is back - lungs and God knows where else this time. Doc figures she'll make it to Christmas without treatment - and she's had enough of that. I felt it when she told me ... got a little misty-eyed. Yeah ... she taught me hell, but we kissed our last goodbye many years ago. Those bitter feelings are days in the past. She's long been forgiven.
She's had the chemo, the radiation. Treatments lasted four years. She's had the surgeries and things taken out. Another part of her died. We all know there's stuff available to keep her "alive" for a long time, but she knows the fight never ends. You're always sick. Guess when you go through it, once is enough. Can't blame her. Her doc's all pffted off with her because she just said "screw it" and signed DNR papers.
Saturday, I felt like I should be out there for when she broke the news to the girls. Our daughters took it well. There were some tears ... but they expected it. My youngest inherited her mother's stiff upper lip. She was all tough and taking it brave. We all knew it was coming. Her Mom said she'll be at the wedding ... but don't be making any plans for after Christmas. Then: both rocks spouted water. That did it. I excused myself for a little walk for the cause....
Mom wanted time with her daughters. Grand daughter kept us busy. Husband was off wandering somewhere. I was almost strangled by two teary-eyed girls' hugs when we got back. Not going to ask what was said, but apparently she "righted some wrongs". Sometimes, you can go back....
I know it should be a good thing ... and I've fallen for it every time. Now, it sends shivers up my spine and ties my gut in a knot. See ... three times now, it's spelled "I'm testing the water again". Why do I keep running into the same woman with a different face?
I'm 49, been divorced for 15 years, took nine years off, and have survived the follow-your-heart fast-fry thing ever since. A lot has changed since we were kids, but one thing stays the same. Hurt doesn't get any easier to take. Best advice is to walk in with your eyes open and be sure it's real before you trust it completely.
I was banned from a site because a former girlfriend believed everything I posted was about our relationship. She may have been a part ... in non-specific terms. I speak from my heart. Other in her own mind, who is really going to know if it's of her I write? My life experience spans a few decades. In that time, hers is but a moment.
It’s not my place to burden you, Disturb your fantasy. No knight in shining armour, I’m no ... ...Cinderella Dream. There are no castles in the sky. We can’t live fairy tales. But, what I have to offer might have ... ...use for you this day.
I don’t want to weigh you down With my reality. You’re a grown-up woman now with ... ...Cinderella dreams Of happy ever afters And tall, rich, handsome guys And I just can’t be one of them. See ... ...I can’t live a lie.
Oh, pretty little dreamer, live your ... ...Cinderella Dream. Only time can teach you Life ain’t easy as it seems.
I couldn’t really please you. I’ve no ... ...pot of gold, it seems, No fairy tale glass slipper for your ... ...Cinderella Dream. There are no pumpkin coaches in this ... ... crazy thing called life. This hand I have to offer you just ... ...may not fit you right.
Pretty much every one of them has been the worst one ever. I just ended one that was right out of a fairy tale ... at first. Love at first sight. Didn't seem anything could get in our way ... except the torch she still carried for an abusive ex-husband. Thing is ... in our headfog, we passed the best friends thing. When she hit the brakes ... I collided with reality. That's when I met her evil side. We (or should I say I) tried to work things out. I ended it when I realized it wasn't going to change. Therein lies why this one feels like the worst. Hell hath no fury?
lone56wolf Forum Posts (10)
RE: How many idiots can you find in the forums
???? Nothing personally identifying.