theredvet Poetry (6)

Letters and songs I wrote them. Poems that go on and on again,
but my heart still breaks.
Showed them what I can and can't handle, so they used me like a candle, they let me burn away.
But I can't fight for this, cause this does not exist, and I know why...


Your too damned to see, the pain that lies beneath me.
You won't even dare to try, and see what's really underneath!


The innocence gone and reborn, into a statue so cold and frozen,
But I like it this way.
Scar on my back is still there, faded and worn but lies in layers,
But I love the pain.
And I can't fight for this, if this does not exist, but I know why...


Your too damned to see, the pain that lies beneath me.
You won't even dare to try, and see what's really underneath!


The love I had in my head is now lost,
words hold no meaning anymore in my heart…
I know now, the demon sleeps inside. Breathing yet I still feel dead.
Holding all that's left, drowning in you. No longer mine.
No longer alive!


Your too damned to see, the pain that lies beneath me.
You won't even dare to try, and see what's really underneath!


I'm too damned to be, loved not caged and set free.
And I don't care to try, and heal the pain that's underneath!

Come over to the bed, I want to live in ecstasy…
I want to see you get into a trance, in this epic dance you'll see…

Out of that dressing room, I saw you.
Clear as day, pursuing you.
Got your a** standing next to the table,
Wanna challenge me? Bet you can handle.
I got a black tight dress on, if the game plays right it might come off.
I don’t need to know what's going on, just after I'm done, you'll be numb.
Calling my name all night long. Watch them dollar bills fly high Hun.
Watch it when you say I'm high strung. I'm just a Italian who wants some.
They call me The Schi / I'm number 1.
Wind moving hips, lighting struck. Done.
Irish/Italian, come give me some.
I'm only nice when I have won.
Nasty girl, plus one.
Anaconda trying to bite me son.
Found this hot chick, digits on the arm.
We're both Bi, You want to have some fun?...
Got it? Get that. Come here. Get back.
Wanna, I'm going, I gotta, gotta hit that...

MDMA. Wanna live in ecstasy.
MDMA. Taking over me.
MDMA. Take care what you ask of me.
MDMA. Ecstasy…

Look at her? She's my next one.
Going take her out back, get her all sprung.
Watch that slender a** bend over the table.
Once I get her tied down, it's all over.
Wanna watch how she screams loud.
Gotta striper girl who acts proud.
Tiny red head with a fast mouth.
Yet she hits hard, and I've backed down.
Liquored so hard she passed out, wake her back up, it's in now.
Gotta lock her up, she mine now.
A puppet on strings, for me it's fun.
When my d*ck wears off she'll be wanting me.
Get her a** addicted, like she supposed to be.
Get her a** in control, no mind reading.
Jedi mind tricks, infecting me.
When I go to sleep, she is all I see.
Like a nightmare it's haunting me.
When I wake up, she waiting for me.
Like another day in ecstasy…
Got it? Get that. Come here. Get back.
Wanna, I'm going, I gotta, gotta hit that...


MDMA. Wanna live in ecstasy.
MDMA. Taking over me.
MDMA. Take care what you ask of me.
MDMA. Ecstasy…


You want me on the bed hun?
Or back on the table?
With all the lights on, press record on the camera.
Get your a** back drunk on the rum love.
I like it better when you've lost control hun.

Get your, get your a** back drunk on the rum love.
I like it so much better when there's no control on.
Get your, get your a** back drunk on the rum love.
I like it so much better when you have no clothes on.

Going to get me some more of that ecstasy.
Going to watch myself take over me.
Don't know how you did it, but you did it to me.
Got me all hooked in that ecstasy. I need…
Got it? Get that. Come here. Get back.
Wanna, I'm going, I gotta, gotta hit that...


MDMA. Wanna live in ecstasy.
MDMA. Taking over me.
MDMA. Take care what you ask of me.
MDMA. Ecstasy…

Come over to the bed, I want to live in ecstasy…
I want to see you get into a trance, in this epic dance you'll see…

You're pulling me down, you're dragging it out.
Pulling my hair, and tearing me down.
Scratching my back, throw me all around,
But I feel so…


Sickened to stomach, I can't feel this. Don't want to lose it, but I can't quit.
Can't control me, can't control you. Locked in a house, just in a room.
Eyes locked now. Screaming loud. Tearing me away, leaving no trace.
I, I know you. I, I've seen you. I, I can feel you…

You're pulling me down, you're dragging it out.
Pulling my hair, and tearing me down.
Scratching my back, throw me all around,
But I feel so…

Upscale quizzical. Lightning strike powerful. Rushing through my veins, made from everything.
Move mountains with my mind, combining space and time. Like a tidal wave, can't anticipate.
You make me feel, so powerful. You make me feel, so wonderful. You make me feel Invincible!


Mirrored myself, conceived in Hell. Forged from earth, birth precious metals.
Flames all arranged, water in place. It's only you. It's only me.
Heart locked now. Mind speak now. I control all, only find how.
I, I hate you. I, I love you. I, I can feel you…

You're pulling me down, you're dragging it out.
Pulling my hair, and tearing me down.
Scratching my back, throw me all around,
But I feel so…

Upscale quizzical. Lightning strike powerful. Rushing through my veins, made from everything.
Move mountains with my mind, combining space and time. Like a tidal wave, can't anticipate.
You make me feel, so powerful. You make me feel, so wonderful. You make me feel Invincible!


So close to me, I hear you speak. Here are we, let's make this be… Stay here with me…

You're pulling me down, you're dragging it out!
Pulling my hair, and tearing me down!
Scratching my back, throw me all around!
Pushing me deeper in the ground…
You're holding me down, you're dragging it out!
Biting my neck, and tearing me down!
Scratching my back, leave scars all around!
Holding me closer till I'm done!

Pulling me down! Dragging it out!
Pulling my hair! Tearing me down!
f*cking me hard! f*cking me loud!
Biting my neck! Holding me down!
Scratching my back! Scars all around!
Hold me closer till we c*m!...

So close to me, I hear you speak. Here are we, let's make this be… Stay here with me…
Dead to me, shall we see? In death forever we will be.

You're pulling me down, you're dragging it out.
Pulling my hair, and tearing me down.
Scratching my back, throw me all around,
But I feel so…

Upscale quizzical! Lightning strike powerful! Rushing through my veins, made from everything!
Move mountains with my mind! Combining space and time! Like a tidal wave, can't anticipate. You make me-

Upscale quizzical! Lightning strike powerful! Rushing through my veins, made from everything!
Move mountains with my mind! Combining space and time! Like a tidal wave, can't anticipate.
You make me feel, so powerful! You make me feel, so wonderful! You make me feel Invincible!

Invincible! Invincible!

Drifting like a wave, settle in the calming day. Shadows cloud my mind, like a storm, raging hurricane. How can I feel like this? An ocean far beyond my mind can catch. Reflected in a mirror I can see, a monster beneath me like the sea.

Hot and dry the land. Red dirt drives the labor of a man. But weather can change. Like a Tornado, we can't tame. All our eyes are blinded by the lies we hide behind.

Who across the universe can hear screams beyond 6ft deep? Where is my soul? Its all over and downhill from here. My only chance to let go is go. Gone away from pain, I think I might just feel the rain. No longer I see a monster beneath the sea I linger on and I just ride a wave with the breeze...

Take a moment to breathe, trying not to scream. But you're dying and I can't save you. Doing everything I can, trying not to let go of your hand. But I can't seem to save you. As your life leaves from your eyes, I see and can only hope I tried...

What am I supposed to do? Sit around and wait for it too. You're dead, and now its over. Holding on to your favorite object, close to my heart and I won't drop it. You're so far gone and I'm alone...

Some people call it heaven, some call it a rainbow bridge. I just want to know where the pain ends. Where did it all began? Where is my most trusted friend? Who's going to keep me from falling under?

Take a breath to heal my wounds. Someday again I'll see you. Peaceful.
Take a breath to keep myself, from going to a path of hell. I can only hope I'll see you somewhere. If only I knew which one of us is there...

I take one step. One back, one forth, but I can't seem to move my feet. Stuck to the earth, can't breathe. The wind it moves, it shakes, it pushes on. I can either push it back or let it carry me away. Somewhere my head it lies, it cries, it feels alive. Only when myself is open can I really close my mind.

And all we see is what glamour seeps beneath. Like water flooding me. But I can not find, a place, a tomb to calm my mind. So I let the ground decide for me. Ill either walk or run or swim.... but I can't trust life with who I am.