A Work In Progress

I have always enjoyed reading, that's no secret. I have a large collection of books -most of them non-fiction - which I enjoy reading again and again.

Most of them cover my interests -photography, theoretical physics, writing, history, computers- but one of them in particular has proven to be a great guide for us men: the book is called "Light Her Fire" by Ellen Kreidman.

Before I continue, please let me say that I am a devoted boyfriend and lover, and most of the material covered in the book deals with romantic gestures, little "igniters" for passion, and those trivial "little things" that mean so much in the long run.

I'm sure my female readers will agree that there is never anything trivial when it comes to relationships. We men tend to trivialize those small gestures, but in truth, these little gestures of affection make all the difference in a relationship. "Light Her Fire" discusses at length the differences in thinking between the two genders, and deals with a number of specific little things that help make or break relationships.

The edition I own dates back to 1991, and every once in awhile I like to read it over; and at every reading, I gain a little more insight on what makes a relationship tick.

My last relationship lasted eleven great years, and I can honestly give credit to some of the great ideas Ms. Kreidman provided in her book. Ideas such as:

- Sing To Her - Make an "I love you" call from the office. Call her and tell her you were just thinking about her and how much she means to you and you just wanted to say , "I love you." If you have a good voice, you could sing a few bars of Stevie Wonder's song, "I Just Called To Say I Love You." Go ahead and sing it even if you don't have a good voice.

- Create A Cereal Hideaway - Buy a very sexy nightgown, wrap it in a small package, and hide it in a cereal box or any other place she'd least expect to find such an item.

You get the idea.

I know that a great many men out there think they are perfect as-is, and wouldn't even consider keeping a book on relationships around. Well, I don't know about you, but I, for one, consider myself a work in progress, and I always seek to become the best possible mate for the woman I love. One of the ways I try to improve on myself is by keeping an open mind, and being open to new ideas, new outlooks, and *gasp* accepting the fact that I might NOT be perfect, no matter how great I look in the mirror! Ok, that last bit is totally not me. The point I'm trying to make is, a great ego has no room for anyone else, so it really helps to admit the fact that everybody -you, me, even the happiest married couples out there- isn't perfectly happy all the time. We are ALL works in progress, there is always room for improvement.

And for the sake of my future love, I'd want to be the BEST darn me that I can be.