Looking back on the past

I spent a big portion of today, talking with my oldest son, via skype. I don't get to see my grandkids up north, often enough. So skype is just one of the means I use, to keep in touch.

While chatting, he told me his step-mon had told him where to find pics of his dad. She said he has changed but he's still stubborn, but a softy. He gave up drinking but he still can be an a$$hole. My son's comment was that even he wouldn't have recognized his own father. So, I went out on the internet and googled him.

OMG, even I wouldn't have recognize him and we were married at one time. He looks so old!!! He has not aged well at all and to think, he use to remind me, when we were married, that I was older than him (gee, give me a break, was only 1 year minus 3 days older). If he has aged that much due to job stress, then I will say I'm glad I don't have his job. If he has aged that much due to life experiences, well, we do share a major tradgey and I have aged much more gracefully. If he has aged that much due to his lifestyle, then I happy that we did divorce, all those years ago. I'm happy he stopped drinking.

My life has been blessed in many ways. I met and fell in love with a wonderful guy. We had our own ups and downs but any time 2 people try to blend their lives together, that is to be expected. WE learned to work thru our issues and compromise. That wonderful person is now gone and I've mourned his death. However, I have rebuilt my life again. I truly have been blessed. I have experienced and grown in my own humaness.

This trip down memory lane on the internet, has been a very humbling experience for me. The next time I start to allow vanity get into my head, I need to stop and count some more blessings.