BREAKING THE CODE ( Archived) (8)

BREAKING THE CODE

I am relatively new to this forum and was wondering whether some of you might provide me with some feedback regarding some feelings I’m having right now. I’ve been reading different posts and think that joining CS was a good idea because it’s a virtual community of friends available 24x7… and thanks to the rotation of the Earth, everyone is awake at some point (insomniacs don’t count).

Anyway, I can say that I achieved great accomplishments in the 24 years of life and have gone through many experiences. I have made many real friends and am quite active in my work. But then, I encountered an experience that has a four-letter word, and no I’m not referring to the f-word but the word ‘love’.


I’ve been in love, fell out of love and sometimes was stuck in between.. I hope you get that last thing. I have many friends, and they say that I have a way with words. Which is flattering but then I am single, smart and on a good day full of creativity and resources.

If you’ve been reading so far you probably want to know what I’m getting at. So I’ll get to the point. I’ve had wonderful experiences with some of my female friends and there are still happy times and so on. But sometimes, I feel rather lonely and even though I was a loner most of my life, once I found love (and lost it) I was changed.

Now, I’ve been disabled all of my life and think that’s part of me. But considering my experiences of either unrequited love or relationships that never become more than friendship, I sometimes wonder what is wrong with the world.

Not that I’m saying that I am in anyway the best person to be with. I have my moods, feelings, and times when I can be happy and inspired. Yet, the question remains hanging there in the horizon… where is she?

I’m not pretending that my thoughts are always that platonic or pure. But that I crave for a meaningful relationship and one in which we are companions to each other. I’m no hunk or hero and definitely I think that the days of seeking a relationship for safety are over. But the lingering feeling is that I’m meant to be with someone, but because I may do things differently, women are scared or either unwilling to contemplate such a possibility.

And to end this thread with some poetic verse:

The code of love to break I tried,
But have for so long been eluded.
For there’s so much at stake, I know,
That in the unknown I may be secluded:
For the price of love read here
Is it’s unconditionality!

that was awesome man,i wish a very best of luck to you,and enjoy man .you are awesome man,that was great/wonderful/very cool/groovie

10012112/phillip.c

Hello Bluewarrior,

I think many people these days, whatever their situation, come to relationships later in years.

I know this will sound a bit off to you, but you are only 24, there will be a time for you.

Love the words.

take care
Siren

Ummm Yeah, what she said...24....

Morning Bluewarrior nizzzzzzzzzzzz thread

Our lives have included sorrow as well as happiness. And all those emotions, all those bittersweet memories, have created what I like to think of as a bright, colorful, firmly woven tapestry.

The happy times are the golden threads that catch the sunlight, warming our hearts. The bright pattern was created by generations gone by and those to come, whose sparkling theads add a nubby texture, a splash of vivid color to the life fabric. The black, somber threads that subdue the tapestry of life's gaudiness were painstakingly woven as we endured hardships and loneliness in life.

Some of the threads in our lives are frayed. Others are broken. But the fabric remains intact because other threads, as invisible as love yet as strong as arms that hold, are woven amongst the weaker ones, holding the delicate fibers together.

I think of how we as people weave our way through the joy and sorrow, good times and bad, relishing the triumphs and supporting each other in times of adversity.

Every loop and knot of our lives adding to the personal fabric we weave.

Very beautiful words. and I just wanted to say that even if I'm 24 - with what iI've gone through and experienced - I seem to relate to different age groups. So perhaps my longing to be with an other that is there physically present is a need to share with someone what is inside me, and also to experience the inner world of someone I love.

I know that this might sound idealistic, but I believe that it's important to be here as I truly am in order to reach out for the one waiting for me on the other side. I am hopeful, now, that whoever she will be there when the right time has come and when we're both ready.
The only nightmare that haunts me still is the one in which I am not seen or heard but just passed on through the sands of time. For the life I know is temporal and reality impermanent, but the force of love - which I yearn for - is forever true, forever beautiful and forever good.

And unless the one get to know me, they will just never know who I am. Not that by knowing me they will know all of me but that at least we'll discover who we are together.