Waiting.. and wanting.. (42)
demonfairyNewton,hickory, North Carolina USA120 Threads 17 Polls 5,654 Postsnicki_love: Hey DF.. what's funny??
That none of us are talking to someone from our area
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demonfairy: That none of us are talking to someone from our area
LOl.. ok.. well yeah I can see how that can be funny.. but to some its no fun wanting to be with someone and realising that it's gonna take some time!
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nicki_love: LOl.. ok.. well yeah I can see how that can be funny.. but to some its no fun wanting to be with someone and realising that it's gonna take some time!
i hope it works out for all of us,
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demonfairy: i hope it works out for all of us,
I hope so too... one way or the other...
Sometimes we may have to change what WE really want in order to get what we should!!
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nicki_love: English.. so my question was really what do you think about me being willing to relocate.. lol.. I fully understand what you say about your situation though.. I imagine that would be really tough. On the other hand, I have both my kids and my son is gonna be 16 at the end of this month and he can easily go to college at our new location.. which would even be better for him.. and my daughter of 19 months.. well, her dad is not in the pic and doesnt want to be.. so for me it would all work out. As I said before, the only hindrance would be my sisters whom I love so much and who has raised me when my parents died as a kid. But for your case, as I said, I understand.. and maybe even sympathise!
Apologies Nicki, I thought your question was an open question for all of us either in an LDR or thinking of getting into one.
I am pleased for you that you are able to relocate, that you are fortunate to have a father to your children who does not want to be a part of their lives, and that you have the custody of your children, but then don't the majority of women get that.
Please don't get me wrong here... I am not being sarcastic or bitter because of the situation I find myself in... I am truely happy for you.
I hope it all works out for you in the future
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Good luck to everyone, it is hard to date this way,too many questions
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demonfairy: That none of us are talking to someone from our area
....I am..
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Englishman55: Apologies Nicki, I thought your question was an open question for all of us either in an LDR or thinking of getting into one.
I am pleased for you that you are able to relocate, that you are fortunate to have a father to your children who does not want to be a part of their lives, and that you have the custody of your children, but then don't the majority of women get that.
Please don't get me wrong here... I am not being sarcastic or bitter because of the situation I find myself in... I am truely happy for you.
I hope it all works out for you in the future
I am pleased for you that you are able to relocate, that you are fortunate to have a father to your children who does not want to be a part of their lives, and that you have the custody of your children, but then don't the majority of women get that.
Please don't get me wrong here... I am not being sarcastic or bitter because of the situation I find myself in... I am truely happy for you.
I hope it all works out for you in the future
thanks Englishman.. for what its worth! However I dont consider it fortunate to have a father who does not wat to be a part of my daugther's life because it is her right to know him and he is denying her that right.. as for my son, I had him from another relationship quite a long time ago.. and he has a great relationship with his dad.. and it would be hard for them to separate but I think what is best for my son would be the best thing for all.. of course if he doesnt want to move with me, that's a totally different story.. I will not leave either of my kids behind.. so it still is a bit tricky for me..
Oh and btw, I never got "custody" of my kids.. I am a single mother who was never married and therefore I have my children.. no one can even contest that!
I hope it works out for you too E.. you seem such a great guy!
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nicki_love: Aww.. well after two finally, I think I actually found one! And believe me if I had looked at his pic alone and allowed myself to be ruled by my old self, I may not have replied but something told me that day to reply just for the heck of it.. and now, for almost two months now, we have been inseparable.. lol.. dont worry, it will come your way one day.. maybe not here but who knows when or how! I never expected this and it is still quite new and interesting!
OMG... that should read "after two years, finally!" lol.. I should get in the habit of proof reading my comments.. lol.
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Happened to me last year. Same scenario though i didn't meet him through a dating site. We both have to wait. so we decided to cool off. Getting familiar with someone and seeing as the need to meet gets more and more urgent, and we both had a lot of things to sort out and get done with, we knew we we're supposed to be in the next stage of the relationship. So we cooled off and maybe get back together when we're ready to proceed, taking things more lightly. Refreshing and liberating.
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nicki_love: OMG... that should read "after two years, finally!" lol.. I should get in the habit of proof reading my comments.. lol.
happy for you!!!------ This thread is Archived ------
I would go about my normal affairs if I were you. Don't dwell on it. What happens if you meet and it doesn't click. If it requires greater than normal sacrifice to you, then reconsider about relocating.
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If two people want to be together they will find a way. I am going through that myself with someone. I found a long way from home. Its scarey and there are a lot of questions that need to be answered still. For now we are just taking it a day at the time till are planned meeting. I'm not sure sure what the future will bring but i am hopeful it will go the way we are wanting it too. Good luck to all those who are in similar situations.
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mychelle: I would go about my normal affairs if I were you. Don't dwell on it. What happens if you meet and it doesn't click. If it requires greater than normal sacrifice to you, then reconsider about relocating.
Thanks mychelle.. It is slowly becoming difficult to not think about this guy! And my normal affairs are still being taken care of.. but he is growing on me and somehow we are both integrating each other into our daily lives! Whether its good or not, I dont know! Only time will tell..
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bae_siilver: If two people want to be together they will find a way. I am going through that myself with someone. I found a long way from home. Its scarey and there are a lot of questions that need to be answered still. For now we are just taking it a day at the time till are planned meeting. I'm not sure sure what the future will bring but i am hopeful it will go the way we are wanting it too. Good luck to all those who are in similar situations.
And Good luck to you too Bae!!
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nicki_love: Ok.. so for those people who have met someone on a dating site and actually had some kind of "relationship" with that person.. this is for you.. Given that the person is legitimate, not a scammer, not married or any of those negative factors that would occur online..
You meet this person purely by chance.. he/she was actually not your physical type but you decided to respond to his/her flower with a brief email saying thank you and feel free to drop a line. He/she takes it and starts communicating and soon enough you realise that you want to chat with this person all the time.. You both make every possible time available to chat, while you are a work, while he is at work...lol.. while you two have free time at home.. you chat all the time, about everything. You actually feel like you know this person for ages. And it feels good. You plan to meet and really want to but have to wait because of one circumstance or the other. How do you bear waiting to see if that connection is real?? What do you do in the meantime, while you are waiting to meet this person.. I mean, the intrigue sets in and sometimes overwhelms.. what do you do about that?? How do I deal with all these feelings??
Oh! I think I need help!
You meet this person purely by chance.. he/she was actually not your physical type but you decided to respond to his/her flower with a brief email saying thank you and feel free to drop a line. He/she takes it and starts communicating and soon enough you realise that you want to chat with this person all the time.. You both make every possible time available to chat, while you are a work, while he is at work...lol.. while you two have free time at home.. you chat all the time, about everything. You actually feel like you know this person for ages. And it feels good. You plan to meet and really want to but have to wait because of one circumstance or the other. How do you bear waiting to see if that connection is real?? What do you do in the meantime, while you are waiting to meet this person.. I mean, the intrigue sets in and sometimes overwhelms.. what do you do about that?? How do I deal with all these feelings??
Oh! I think I need help!
It´s a very difficult position to be in for sure. Can you put your life on hold until the eventual meeting, if indeed it ever happens?
It also depends on how sociable and what kind of social life you already have. If you have a life outside of here and are meetng people every day, going out etc, that makes it doubly difficult. You have to make a decision about whether the whole LDR or online thing is likely to be worth the wait, however long that may be.
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JAN_is: It´s a very difficult position to be in for sure. Can you put your life on hold until the eventual meeting, if indeed it ever happens?
It also depends on how sociable and what kind of social life you already have. If you have a life outside of here and are meetng people every day, going out etc, that makes it doubly difficult. You have to make a decision about whether the whole LDR or online thing is likely to be worth the wait, however long that may be.
It also depends on how sociable and what kind of social life you already have. If you have a life outside of here and are meetng people every day, going out etc, that makes it doubly difficult. You have to make a decision about whether the whole LDR or online thing is likely to be worth the wait, however long that may be.
Hi Jan.. I have made somewhat of a conscious decision to not have a social life here.. It is limited and quite boring, the options. My actual time of enjoyment and socialising is usually done with my elder sisters, my nieces and nephews.. and of course, my kids. I hardly ever hang out with people outside of that circle anymore.. I used to party a lot when I was a bit younger, but after my daughter was born I realised that this is not me anymore. I no longer have a desire for socialising in my little island.. So I really dont have much else to do, in that aspect, while I wait to meet this guy. However, there are other things that I have embarked on (projects that I have been thinking about for a while) and things that I want to do soon.. and in the meantime, I am doing those things.. my life hasnt stopped because of him.. but I would really like to meet him and I am beginning to look at this time as a learning period for both of us.. time for us to get to know as much as we can about each other.
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Englishman55: And what happens if you have real strong feelings for the person, but they live half way around the world........
You consider the possibility to travel and meet with them, but realise that if you did meet and hit it off, and the chemistry was really working, it's still an impossible dream....... what happens then............
You go back home knowing that you have commitments in your own country as they do... and that relocation really is NOT an option....
So rather than torture each other, you decide the best option is to cool the relationship off now !
I guess that's the major problem with an International dating site.
You consider the possibility to travel and meet with them, but realise that if you did meet and hit it off, and the chemistry was really working, it's still an impossible dream....... what happens then............
You go back home knowing that you have commitments in your own country as they do... and that relocation really is NOT an option....
So rather than torture each other, you decide the best option is to cool the relationship off now !
I guess that's the major problem with an International dating site.
Ooooo but what an adventure...and who knows? love finds its own way
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Englishman55: And what happens if you have real strong feelings for the person, but they live half way around the world........
You consider the possibility to travel and meet with them, but realise that if you did meet and hit it off, and the chemistry was really working, it's still an impossible dream....... what happens then............
You go back home knowing that you have commitments in your own country as they do... and that relocation really is NOT an option....
So rather than torture each other, you decide the best option is to cool the relationship off now !
I guess that's the major problem with an International dating site.
You consider the possibility to travel and meet with them, but realise that if you did meet and hit it off, and the chemistry was really working, it's still an impossible dream....... what happens then............
You go back home knowing that you have commitments in your own country as they do... and that relocation really is NOT an option....
So rather than torture each other, you decide the best option is to cool the relationship off now !
I guess that's the major problem with an International dating site.
its really pretty dishearting, you meet so many nice people sometimes on these sites and find a deep connection with someone and i have to agree relocation is a big issue, in truth I know that i would never relocate at this time in my life or near future though my kids are pretty much grown and almost out on thier own I would never leave them and im so close to my family that i see them several times a week , if we dont see eachother at least once a week we go through withdrawls lol , so i feel for anybody in this situation because its very difficult, probably why even though I want something more serious I view all contact as friendship .
good luck to everyone , everyone deserves to find their right one and find happiness with them
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Hey big guy.. I agree that the fact of distance is quite a big issue.. however I believe that if you come onto an international dating site and are willing to even open yourself up to a person from another country, then you should have considered the relocation issue first.
Hi Niki love
Good on you,I did think about relocation when joining CS, and in my situation, all my family live dotted over seas, they have done for 28 years, I only have my 30yr old son here in NZ and well settled with his partner.
My job, also gives me many opportunities to work any where in the world within finance, and construction. I'm a very independent lady and embrace change. But that's just me.
How exciting for you.....
I wish you well on your journey in your life.
SS
Hi Niki love
Good on you,I did think about relocation when joining CS, and in my situation, all my family live dotted over seas, they have done for 28 years, I only have my 30yr old son here in NZ and well settled with his partner.
My job, also gives me many opportunities to work any where in the world within finance, and construction. I'm a very independent lady and embrace change. But that's just me.
How exciting for you.....
I wish you well on your journey in your life.
SS
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