We say sorry, not because we are wrong...... (12)
Amenda:
1. What would an American or a western person say in that position of the Chinese in the story?
2. Would you do as the American did in the story if you were the American in the story, passed the buck to the person who say "sorry" to you?
Hope I've said clear the whole story and my questions....thanks for reading.....
1. What would an American or a western person say in that position of the Chinese in the story?
2. Would you do as the American did in the story if you were the American in the story, passed the buck to the person who say "sorry" to you?
Hope I've said clear the whole story and my questions....thanks for reading.....
Hi Amenda
Westerners are not all like the one you described. You get good and bad everywhere. Some just like to take advantage of a good person with a bit of kindness in them, and people breaking the law tend to take advantage and lie.Here sometimes we tend to be more careful with expressions of sympathy, or we might clarify it more because we understand this.
The scenario here might be, (if it was the opposite way around), to say something like, "that was a reckless piece of driving you did, but I am sorry you got hurt", or "it's a pity you got hurt, but it was inevitable when you were driving like that". This kind of statement clarifys things a bit and puts the blame where it belongs even while feeling sorry for someone.
Hope this helps.
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Amenda: ...now I wonder
1. What would an American or a western person say in that position of the Chinese in the story?
2. Would you do as the American did in the story if you were the American in the story, passed the buck to the person who say "sorry" to you?
HOpe I've said clear the whole story and my questions....thanks for reading.....
1. What would an American or a western person say in that position of the Chinese in the story?
2. Would you do as the American did in the story if you were the American in the story, passed the buck to the person who say "sorry" to you?
HOpe I've said clear the whole story and my questions....thanks for reading.....
Please, we Americans are not all like that. I think most would react innocently in the same way, expressing sympathy for someone who was hurt. It's the lawyers, those vultures, who want to turn everything into a blame game. They are sneered at as "ambulance-chasers" for a reason. I'm sorry to hear your fellow citizen was victimized in that way, but by that I mean it was an unforeseeable event for which no blame could possibly assigned to anyone, particularly you him or I.
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GingerBe: Hi Amenda Westerners are not all like the one you described. You get good and bad everywhere. Some just like to take advantage of a good person with a bit of kindness in them, and people breaking the law tend to take advantage and lie.
Here sometimes we tend to be more careful with expressions of sympathy, or we might clarify it more because we understand this.The scenario here might be, (if it was the opposite way around), to say something like, "that was a reckless piece of driving you did, but I am sorry you got hurt", or "it's a pity you got hurt, but it was inevitable when you were driving like that". This kind of statement clarifys things a bit and puts the blame where it belongs even while feeling sorry for someone.Hope this helps.
Here sometimes we tend to be more careful with expressions of sympathy, or we might clarify it more because we understand this.The scenario here might be, (if it was the opposite way around), to say something like, "that was a reckless piece of driving you did, but I am sorry you got hurt", or "it's a pity you got hurt, but it was inevitable when you were driving like that". This kind of statement clarifys things a bit and puts the blame where it belongs even while feeling sorry for someone.Hope this helps.
Great answer indeed...I understand very well what you said...
so kind of you, Gingerbe....Thank you so much....
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Amenda: Great answer indeed...I understand very well what you said...
so kind of you, Gingerbe....Thank you so much....
so kind of you, Gingerbe....Thank you so much....
My pleasure Amenda.
All language is difficult.
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Dagosto: Please, we Americans are not all like that. I think most would react innocently in the same way, expressing sympathy for someone who was hurt. It's the lawyers, those vultures, who want to turn everything into a blame game. They are sneered at as "ambulance-chasers" for a reason.
Please, I never thought you Americans or western people are all like that. or I would not sit here almost every day...
I like reading magazines when my daughter study, such as, <readers> or <special focals> (Chinese)...most articles related with western world are very nice, I learnt a lot western things from that....very less like the story I posted here. I wanted to ask my CS friends about this as soon as I finished reading that story.....now I know that man was really not common in your country just like I imagined, just like what gingerbe said: there are good person and bad person everywhere.....
Thanks
Dagosto: but by that I mean it was an unforeseeable event for which no blame could possibly assigned to anyone, particularly you him or I.
sorry, can't understand this very well
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GingerBe: My pleasure Amenda. All language is difficult.
Yes, you see I post here, seems that my English is so so....in fact I use online dictionary a lot here.....you don't know my speaking Engish and listening English is more worse than my writing English....so...it's good that I never seen any CS friend in person....or...can't imagine how much they would laugh at my English.....maybe would be better if with a dictionary in my hand....
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Amenda: Yes, you see I post here, seems that my English is so so....in fact I use online dictionary a lot here.....you don't know my speaking Engish and listening English is more worse than my writing English....so...it's good that I never seen any CS friend in person....or...can't imagine how much they would laugh at my English.....maybe would be better if with a dictionary in my hand....
I am sure that if you met anyone from here, that their Chinese would be much worse than your English, and no one would laugh at you for making the effort to speak to them in any language.
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Don't believe EVERYTHING you read...
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GingerBe: I am sure that if you met anyone from here, that their Chinese would be much worse than your English, and no one would laugh at you for making the effort to speak to them in any language.
thank you! ------ This thread is Archived ------
davpk10: Don't believe EVERYTHING you read...
ok...
if I have doubt I would post here and ask real person from western world....
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Amenda: I read quite a few magazines this couple of days when I was not online...one story by a Chinese in USA made me think a lot....it says:
The Chinese had a car crash with an American because the Amrerican wanted to overtake his car on winding road. The American hurt head but the Chinese didn't hurt at all. When he saw blood sheding down the American's head...he felt heart hurt for him so couldn't help say "sorry"..."I'm so sorry" even in front of the police...he knew that no his resposibility at all...but just softheart and feel sympathy....
But later the police punished the Chinese nearly 200 us dollars according to the American's statement and his "sorry" after the accident. The Chinese blood boiled...I said sorry because I felt sympathy to the American and I really disliked this kind of thing happen...not because I admited I was wrong...He appealed again, and of course he won at last....but he still felt very uncomfortable about the matter. When he talked about the matter to another Chinese friend of his in USA, his friend told him: Be sure not say "sorry" if you are not wrong.....I think this is really because of our language background and culture background. We Chinese like to say sorry when we feel sympathy, sad ....even when we are not wrong....we like to be implicit....very different with western culture...I'm sure any Chinese would say "sorry" in the situation in the story.....now I wonder
1. What would an American or a western person say in that position of the Chinese in the story?
2. Would you do as the American did in the story if you were the American in the story, passed the buck to the person who say "sorry" to you?
HOpe I've said clear the whole story and my questions....thanks for reading.....
In my mind, your story is a great definition of "instant karma" The Chinese had a car crash with an American because the Amrerican wanted to overtake his car on winding road. The American hurt head but the Chinese didn't hurt at all. When he saw blood sheding down the American's head...he felt heart hurt for him so couldn't help say "sorry"..."I'm so sorry" even in front of the police...he knew that no his resposibility at all...but just softheart and feel sympathy....
But later the police punished the Chinese nearly 200 us dollars according to the American's statement and his "sorry" after the accident. The Chinese blood boiled...I said sorry because I felt sympathy to the American and I really disliked this kind of thing happen...not because I admited I was wrong...He appealed again, and of course he won at last....but he still felt very uncomfortable about the matter. When he talked about the matter to another Chinese friend of his in USA, his friend told him: Be sure not say "sorry" if you are not wrong.....I think this is really because of our language background and culture background. We Chinese like to say sorry when we feel sympathy, sad ....even when we are not wrong....we like to be implicit....very different with western culture...I'm sure any Chinese would say "sorry" in the situation in the story.....now I wonder
1. What would an American or a western person say in that position of the Chinese in the story?
2. Would you do as the American did in the story if you were the American in the story, passed the buck to the person who say "sorry" to you?
HOpe I've said clear the whole story and my questions....thanks for reading.....
and no way would I have said or even felt sorry for him. I'd have probably told him it served him right for driving so reckless and he got what he deserved.------ This thread is Archived ------
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Created: Jun 2010
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The Chinese had a car crash with an American because the Amrerican wanted to overtake his car on winding road. The American hurt head but the Chinese didn't hurt at all. When he saw blood sheding down the American's head...he felt heart hurt for him so couldn't help say "sorry"..."I'm so sorry" even in front of the police...he knew that no his resposibility at all...but just softheart and feel sympathy....
But later the police punished the Chinese nearly 200 us dollars according to the American's statement and his "sorry" after the accident. The Chinese blood boiled...I said sorry because I felt sympathy to the American and I really disliked this kind of thing happen...not because I admited I was wrong...He appealed again, and of course he won at last....but he still felt very uncomfortable about the matter. When he talked about the matter to another Chinese friend of his in USA, his friend told him: Be sure not say "sorry" if you are not wrong.....
I think this is really because of our language background and culture background. We Chinese like to say sorry when we feel sympathy, sad ....even when we are not wrong....we like to be implicit....very different with western culture...
I'm sure any Chinese would say "sorry" in the situation in the story.....now I wonder
1. What would an American or a western person say in that position of the Chinese in the story?
2. Would you do as the American did in the story if you were the American in the story, passed the buck to the person who say "sorry" to you?
HOpe I've said clear the whole story and my questions....thanks for reading.....