Recipe for disaster ( Archived) (42)

Maybe u r equipped for long term and maybe ur not, but the heart knows who it wants. U know when u felt the crumbling inside, was when u were morning the loss of another person in ur life....Sounds to me that u have found two that were just not right for u. Keep the chin up, so u don't miss the right one for u...

Moral of the story never listen to an X

Hello Antjo,

Negative thinking is a recipe for disaster. If you say it long enough, you may tend to believe it as being a truth and it will block you from ever succeeding in a relationship.

Life, genetics & relationships are very complex. Consider perhaps the recipe for success....kinda like a delicious soup recipe. If you say that recipe long enough and know what ingredients you want and need, you will be more open and able to see if those ingredients are in the other person in the first place. If they are lacking, then you don't want to even start a relationship with them otherwise you will be dissappointed.

Also I do believe that even finding the one with your right recipe, it takes alot of work for both to add to it to keep on improving it. Kinda like a recipe for life, love and happiness. The final taste and aroma will be right for the both of you. That is the recipe for success in relationships.

Any couple who has been married for many years and still has that twinkle of love in their eyes for each other knows well about the successful recipe that works for them.

You asked about genetics and I believe there is a connection between that and relationships as you have brought up. Hormones are part of our genetic makeup and affect our thinking process. Hormones may play some part in why people have a difficult time staying in a relationship. Some women can be very moody on a monthly basis where others are not. All men go through the andropause...the male version of the change of life but all behavior is not the same for all men. In our country, it is not uncommon that lots of marriages fall apart at this time as many men start running around on their spouses, dress flashy, play the big shot of sorts with flashy vehicles, boats, motorcycles to attract a young woman conquest. As their hormones start to decrease, some feel an urge to do something to prove themselves as still very verile. Some women go through chasing after younger men around menopause. Although not every person goes through it like this, we all do feel some changes about themselves as we age and it is these hormonal shifts that affect our thinking and our relationships.

Add to it that some of the lack of success in realationships may be planted as memories in our minds through the environment and experiences we've been accustomed to growing up with. A person may model themselves after what they feel is proper at the moment and not worry about the future. But then after awhile, the future does come to be the present and then they realize that life has rushed by them and they are alone.

I wish you happiness in your life. You're a great guy and deserve the best only. Keep your recipe positive

Nah, but the trouble is, exes know you very well and are not afraid to speak up (whatever reason they may have to do so).

So, before hanging out with the ex, you gotta be mentally prepared to hear what you might not wanna hear... and when you hear it, you need to decide, if they´ve got a valid point or not.

Ant...you are your own worse enemy. You have become a self-fufilling prophesy. If you want a different outcome, you need to completely channge your outlook or else be a lonely old man. Something I wouldnt wish on anyone...good luck