would you travel to meetsome ( Archived) (18)

I've already traveled large distances to be with women I've met on the Internet (not on CS though).

I traveled up to 600 miles to meet with a woman. I stayed with her for a month though. I would never travel that far just for a one-night-stand. In fact, I actually did this with four women over the past 6 or 8 years.

In every case we ended up being great friends, but unfortunately I didn't fall 'in-love' with any of them. That's not to say that I didn't love them. I did love them as best friends. I sincerely cared for each and every one of them and I WISH I could have fallen in love with any one of them. Unfortunately you can't logically decide to fall in love with someone.

Enjoying staying with them for a few months and having great times together is NOT the same as making a lifetime commitment to spend the rest of my life with them. I would have to be 'in-love' to do that.

I've been in-love in the past. Unfortunately never with a woman who was simultaneously in love with me. So I know what it feels like to be in love. There's no way that I'm going to make a monogamous lifetime commitment to someone I don't feel that way about. It wouldn’t be fair to me or to her. And then what would I feel like if I really did fall in love with someone else after that?

No thank you. If I hook up permanently with a woman it's going to be because we are mutually in love. Anything short of that would be a completely disaster for both of us!

Now, I did offer to extend our relationship as 'just friends' without a lifetime commitment. But that can't possibly work in reality. Especially in a long-distance situation. Who's going to relocate without a commitment for someone who isn't romantically head-over-heels 'in-love' with them?

Unfortunately I'm financially and emotionally zapped now. Too many let-downs. Would I travel to be 'in-love'? YES! But how can you know until you've already made the trip?