Sell Out.... (56)
peachmelba: Sometimes two people who have been together for a long time and grown apart need to separate in order to be free and grow as a person ,
If we and my ex hubby had of stayed together we would have destroyed each other,
Tho separation was like a death for the two of us at the time it was for the best for the two of us,
It would of been selling ourselves short to have stayed together,
And from separation after time came a mutual respect and moving on that takes time,
If we and my ex hubby had of stayed together we would have destroyed each other,
Tho separation was like a death for the two of us at the time it was for the best for the two of us,
It would of been selling ourselves short to have stayed together,
And from separation after time came a mutual respect and moving on that takes time,
Omg got carried away writing thete ,
Okay I'm off,
Fraya: My understanding of the thread is being put in a position, for the sake of a romantic relationship, where one has to forego to a degree that which defines the individual. Hence the compromise? Perhaps I am misunderstanding this.
I understood it to mean forego completely, that which defined the
individual,, i'm sure the poster will clear this up later
peachmelba: Omg got carried away writing thete ,
Okay I'm off,
Okay I'm off,
Shoot from the hip Peach, its what you do so well
Fraya: Compromise has to happen for a relationship to exist, let alone last. Obviously if its an unhealthy one do a runner at first opportunity. For two individuals to exist together harmoniously, compromise has to feature.
Well yes in that context it does,
Fraya: Shoot from the hip Peach, its what you do so well
Ah bit too much sometimes Freya,
Go girl your turn.
.peachmelba: Ah bit too much sometimes Freya,Go girl your turn.
.
.
Actually I need to shoot from the hip more,
,lol,lolpeachmelba: Actually I need to shoot from the hip more, ,lol,lol
Freya is the women's mentor on here,
. ,lol,Have a good one Freya .
peachmelba: Ah bit too much sometimes Freya,Go girl your turn.
.
.
Ah I suspect you are more controlled than you say
But if you "sell out" that which defines you, for love of someone
doesn't that in itself bring resentment later on , any compromise goes out the window ,if you deny yourself something which makes you happy
doesn't that in itself bring resentment later on , any compromise goes out the window ,if you deny yourself something which makes you happy
Fraya: Ah I suspect you are more controlled than you say
I do take a few deep breathes now and again,
Or think of rob Kearny,
Ahhh.
.Lol.
annaroach: But if you "sell out" that which defines you, for love of someone
doesn't that in itself bring resentment later on , any compromise goes out the window ,if you deny yourself something which makes you happy
doesn't that in itself bring resentment later on , any compromise goes out the window ,if you deny yourself something which makes you happy
Love and lust can be blind, ie we are blinded at the time,
No need for resentments tho later ,
I wrote a load of guff here a minute ago and thought, well, it all sounds a bit "woe is me"....to cut the BS, Freya and Anna, you are both correct at a point....
Sell Out is when compromise feels conscripted...and yes, i have been there....nobody's fault but mine, and the funny thing is, I have repeated the same pattern a couple of times since.....
To paraphrase the song..."the things we do for love"....
Is there a lesson learned at this late hour.....I should co-coa....
Sell Out is when compromise feels conscripted...and yes, i have been there....nobody's fault but mine, and the funny thing is, I have repeated the same pattern a couple of times since.....
To paraphrase the song..."the things we do for love"....
Is there a lesson learned at this late hour.....I should co-coa....
annaroach: But if you "sell out" that which defines you, for love of someone
doesn't that in itself bring resentment later on , any compromise goes out the window ,if you deny yourself something which makes you happy
doesn't that in itself bring resentment later on , any compromise goes out the window ,if you deny yourself something which makes you happy
If I want to get up early for a walk or a swim before work I will do it quietly (no music or loud noises) because he is still asleep. If he wants to use the kitchen table for poker with his mates after dinner I will not insist on using it as an ironing board. Not unreasonable compromise.
If he insists I never swim in the sea again because he believes its a bad idea or I adamantly disapprove of poker because I don't like it, not sustainable compromise.
peachmelba: Love and lust can be blind, ie we are blinded at the time,
No need for resentments tho later ,
No need for resentments tho later ,
What I mean is if we are besotted with someone at the time our judgement might be clouded as to see or even want to see that something on the sub conscience level is not quite right,
So therefore we can compromise ourselves because we are unaware at the time,
Or simply just get into a pattern of habitual that it becomes the norm as we are creatures of habits,
I suppose it's all down to the individual and mental state etc as to when we are awakened to make changes for the better in ourselves and sometimes people will and sometimes minds and eyes are closed so to speak,
annaroach: But if you "sell out" that which defines you, for love of someone
doesn't that in itself bring resentment later on , any compromise goes out the window ,if you deny yourself something which makes you happy
doesn't that in itself bring resentment later on , any compromise goes out the window ,if you deny yourself something which makes you happy
I was writing my guff when you posted this...YES, point well made....
Fraya: If I want to get up early for a walk or a swim before work I will do it quietly (no music or loud noises) because he is still asleep. If he wants to use the kitchen table for poker with his mates after dinner I will not insist on using it as an ironing board. Not unreasonable compromise.
If he insists I never swim in the sea again because he believes its a bad idea or I adamantly disapprove of poker because I don't like it, not sustainable compromise.
If he insists I never swim in the sea again because he believes its a bad idea or I adamantly disapprove of poker because I don't like it, not sustainable compromise.
Freya don't think the thread is about that type of compromise,
peachmelba: Freya don't think the thread is about that type of compromise,
I completely missed the point then
About_Blank: I wrote a load of guff here a minute ago and thought, well, it all sounds a bit "woe is me"....to cut the BS, Freya and Anna, you are both correct at a point....
Sell Out is when compromise feels conscripted...and yes, i have been there....nobody's fault but mine, and the funny thing is, I have repeated the same pattern a couple of times since.....
To paraphrase the song..."the things we do for love"....
Is there a lesson learned at this late hour.....I should co-coa....
Sell Out is when compromise feels conscripted...and yes, i have been there....nobody's fault but mine, and the funny thing is, I have repeated the same pattern a couple of times since.....
To paraphrase the song..."the things we do for love"....
Is there a lesson learned at this late hour.....I should co-coa....
That's it,, sorted so!!
Compromise can mean a mutual agreement to differ ,,give and take,
Another compromise can mean .
I will not compromise myself by doing something that I don't like or have distaste for or do not agree with for the sake of that other person to suit their needs or ideals when it is not my own,
I'm just giving an example,
Another compromise can mean .
I will not compromise myself by doing something that I don't like or have distaste for or do not agree with for the sake of that other person to suit their needs or ideals when it is not my own,
I'm just giving an example,
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I would say myself and my ex compromised each other for a long time to try make things work,
Just we had grown so apart,.
Sometimes two people who have been together for a long time and grown apart need to separate in order to be free and grow as a person ,
If we and my ex hubby had of stayed together we would have destroyed each other,
Tho separation was like a death for the two of us at the time it was for the best for the two of us,
It would of been selling ourselves short to have stayed together,
And from separation after time came a mutual respect and moving on that takes time,