Is it possible to Love somebody but not RESPECT him/her? (60)
That rugby player in England comes to mind and what he did the weekend....if he had any ounce of respect for his wife he wouldn't get himself into the situation that developed.... 
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Grandsiozzie: So Didi could you risk ending up with a gentleman who seemingly respect you but don't love you,
or do you not care as long as he tells you in the most lovely fashion
(including flowers and a nice neckless) that he loves you.
And when are you gonna reveal what the terapista said.
I'd like to k now if I could agree.
I'm still on the forget the style thing; find out if he really loves you.
And even if that might have to build up over some time, what you end up with is real.
At this stage in my life, I no longer value love above all else. I now prefer to focus more on giving and receiving respect - valuing who the person is, his personal views on life and his expectations of or wants from a relationship, whilst sharing the same about myself. If I can accept/respect him for what he has to offer as a person, then that's a good start for me.or do you not care as long as he tells you in the most lovely fashion
(including flowers and a nice neckless) that he loves you.
And when are you gonna reveal what the terapista said.
I'd like to k now if I could agree.
I'm still on the forget the style thing; find out if he really loves you.
And even if that might have to build up over some time, what you end up with is real.
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Whataboutromance: That rugby player in England comes to mind and what he did the weekend....if he had any ounce of respect for his wife he wouldn't get himself into the situation that developed....
Usually, one has to have a healthy dose of 'self-respect', in order to understand how to give/show respect to others. Love and respect are different constructs but depend on each other for efficacy. How is it possible to 'love' one's spouse/partner yet disrespect him/her through infidelity? What is wrong - the depth of love or the level of respect? ------ This thread is Archived ------
I think the key difference is that respect will invariably have you live longer, but love will have you die younger. A man would live longer and more respectfully as a voluntarily celibate male eunuch, and women would live longer if they never had children. It isn't respect that has us open up to and support these things. The women and children.
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rohaan: I suppose. Figure a family member who has just been completely wrong, for whatever reason. You don't respect them anymore, but usually still do love them. jmo
I agree, but, based upon the extent and frequency of the wrong, the 'love' could also fade.------ This thread is Archived ------
Didi7: The "respect me" thing, as you refer to it, was never MY mantra. It was, however, that of my ex, who also accused me of "usurping his authority". Also, it is a mantra that is quoted by many other men I've met over time, and some who I have grown up with (such as my father and my eldest brother). The issue seems to be connected to their 'EGO'
Wow, is all I can say.Toxic is the second word after wow.. Is wow a word? lol
Wtf- stay clear of such men (!)
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Grandsiozzie: Wow, is all I can say.
Toxic is the second word after wow.. Is wow a word? lol
Wtf- stay clear of such men (!)
For sure, that's one reason why I prefer to spend more time in 'friendship', than just hopping into a 'relationship'. Toxic is the second word after wow.. Is wow a word? lol
Wtf- stay clear of such men (!)
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ChesneyChrist: I think that of both men and women... but are they really this or are they simply too embarrassed to be anything else? You have to be very skilled to get away with the truth.
Good question, CC. But I think that the patriarchal nature of most societies (inclusive of my own) is largely responsible for that, and it's not easy to "get away from the truth", as you say.------ This thread is Archived ------
The word respect comes from the Latin, re-spectum, which means look again or look more carefully. If we look close enough we will find almost all people can be shown respect one way or another. Just as we find respect for a person, we can also find love for them if we take time to allow it.
Hatred and dislike however arise much too easily to those predisposed to such negative emotions and really should always be guarded against.
Hatred and dislike however arise much too easily to those predisposed to such negative emotions and really should always be guarded against.
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bodleing2: The word respect comes from the Latin, re-spectum, which means look again or look more carefully. If we look close enough we will find almost all people can be shown respect one way or another. Just as we find respect for a person, we can also find love for them if we take time to allow it.
Hatred and dislike however arise much too easily to those predisposed to such negative emotions and really should always be guarded against.
Thank you for your input, Bod. I also ascribe to 'showing respect in one way or other', on a basic level. However, when it pertains to someone that we profess to love, or who professes to love us, that respect should be on a higher level. Don't you think so?Hatred and dislike however arise much too easily to those predisposed to such negative emotions and really should always be guarded against.
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Didi7: Thank you for your input, Bod. I also ascribe to 'showing respect in one way or other', on a basic level. However, when it pertains to someone that we profess to love, or who professes to love us, that respect should be on a higher level. Don't you think so?
I'm not sure there are levels of respect,, I believe the respect you give to a stranger for their actions or words is the same as the respect you may give to someone who is much closer.To respect is to accept .
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Didi7: Thank you for your input, Bod. I also ascribe to 'showing respect in one way or other', on a basic level. However, when it pertains to someone that we profess to love, or who professes to love us, that respect should be on a higher level. Don't you think so?
To love someone and for them to love us as you say, for me amounts to a two way agreement supported by various forms of attachment, or even projections. Respect however does not really need to be reciprocal to be genuine. I believe respect and emotional love can exist separately, one does not depend on the other.------ This thread is Archived ------
bodleing2: To love someone and for them to love us as you say, for me amounts to a two way agreement supported by various forms of attachment, or even projections. Respect however does not really need to be reciprocal to be genuine. I believe respect and emotional love can exist separately, one does not depend on the other.
Hurrah!She might listen to you Bod! Me, not so much
Cos I'm a real wild child... (remb that song?)
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Grandsiozzie: Hurrah!
She might listen to you Bod! Me, not so much
Cos I'm a real wild child... (remb that song?)
He certainly is too....She might listen to you Bod! Me, not so much
Cos I'm a real wild child... (remb that song?)
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bodleing2: To love someone and for them to love us as you say, for me amounts to a two way agreement supported by various forms of attachment, or even projections. Respect however does not really need to be reciprocal to be genuine. I believe respect and emotional love can exist separately, one does not depend on the other.
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the topic, Bod. And, though I understand and could appreciate your point of view, I'm not sure that I agree fully.
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Grandsiozzie: Hurrah!
She might listen to you Bod! Me, not so much
Cos I'm a real wild child... (remb that song?)
G, it is not that I don't "listen to you". I hear what you say, but I don't always agree. She might listen to you Bod! Me, not so much
Cos I'm a real wild child... (remb that song?)
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Didi7: G, it is not that I don't "listen to you". I hear what you say, but I don't always agree.
Nononono... its' the other way around 
We agree in 2.4% of the casuses, or thereabout
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Grandsiozzie: Nononono... its' the other way around
We agree in 2.4% of the casuses, or thereabout
We agree in 2.4% of the casuses, or thereabout
smh...------ This thread is Archived ------
Didi7: smh...
Told you! ------ This thread is Archived ------
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I don't know, what is the meaning of love in the mind of that therapist?
love is a very deep feeling in which all the goodness (kindness, decency, humbleness, respect, calmness, etc.) are stored. It depends on the depth of love you have reached.