Advice for the girls... :) (21)

ON PREPARING FOR A MAMMOGRAM;

Many women are afraid of their first mammogram, but there is no need. Take a few minutes each day with the following exercises, and you will be tatally prepared. These are easily done in your own home.


Exercise one:

Open refrigerator door, and insert one breast between the door and the fridge. Shut the door as hard as possible, leaning on it for good measure. Hold this position for at least five seconds. Repeat again just incase the first time wasn't effective enough.


Exercise two:


Go into the garage at 3am when the cement temperature is just perfect. Take off all your clothes and lie comfortably on your side, with one breast wedged under a rear tyre of the car. Ask a passing stranger to - slowly -reverse over your breast until it is sufficiently flattened and chilled. Once satisfied, turn over and do the same on the other breast.

Exercise three:


Freeze two metal bookends overnight. Strip to the waist. Invite a different stranger into the room. Get him to press the bookends against one of your breasts, - then smash them together as hard as he can.

Invite the stranger to set up an appointment and do the same again next year.

NOW, - CONSIDER YOURSELF PREPARED!

oh dear that sounds scary!!!



but i did laugh loads!

OUCH!!!

All to true

How old do you have to be before you absosolutly have to go for one of these? Sounds like torture!!