DRIVING UNDER THE INFLUENCE ( Archived) (126)

Any good stories people??

Me

I have to drink and drive
cos I can't walk when I'm pissed

Yes 2 cups of tea and then im ready to drive

I never drive under the afluenec of incohol.

This is a totally true story and happened to ME personally about 15-16 years ago.

I had moved in with my father after living with my grandmother for about 2 years. Upon moving in with him, I had to clean out the bedroom from when his old roommate lived there. When cleaning I found a full length mirror that had a crack in it at the bottom, so I decided to pitch it out.

I went outside under the carport (where cars are parked) and set the mirror behind some trashcans and was going to take it to the curb on trash day.

That evening I was in the house watching TV and my father was out having one of his late night binges. I saw headlights flood the living room so I knew that he was pulling into the driveway. I then proceeded to hear a loud BOOM and that was followed by the slam of the kitchen door.

My father came staggering into the house drunker than a lumberjack on payday...he proceeds to loudly yell at me "Whose the dumb SOB that put the F'ing mirror behind the trash cans out back???" and I said simply "I did,why?"

He says "Because when I came around the corner all I saw was headlights and I thought it was a car coming straight at me and I swerved and hit the side of the house!!!!!" I proceeded to tell him "well maybe if you weren't so drunk you'd realize that cars can't DRIVE under carports!!!!"

I still laugh when I think about it to this day....just almost makes me laugh till I cry!!!! You had to be there,it was truly priceless!

wish I had a car that ran on 2 cups of tea

I was on the Isle of Margarita - Venezuela - couple of years back. This is one of the very few countries were (local) people are allowed to drive under influence. When cops see you clime into your car wasted, they'll probably give you a hand getting in and help you on your way.

Don't mistake this with the Venezuela mainland. Here it is a crime.

Anyhow. At a certain point three big national bicycle racers were killed by a drunk driver during an evening training on the Island. It was already dark and the driver claimed not to have seen the cyclists.

Great measurements were taken from that day on: On the Isle of Margarita it is no longer permitted to ride a bicycle after 18:00 hours...

Solved that problem, I like the way they think.

They should do that here

and ban them on Sundays

Is this English..........You must be drunk right now............