jokes ( Archived) (2)

A young Chinese couple gets married. She's a virgin. Truth be told, he is a virgin too, but she doesn't know that. On their wedding night, she cowers naked under the sheets as her husband undresses in the darkness. He climbs into bed next to her and tries to be reassuring.

'My darring,' he whispers, 'I know dis you firss time and you berry frighten. I promise you, I give you anyting you want, I do anyting - juss anyting you want. You juss ask Whatchu want?' he says, trying to sound experienced and worldly, which he hopes will impress her.

A thoughtful silence follows and he waits patiently (and eagerly) for her request. She eventually shyly whispers back, 'I want to try something I have heard about from other girls... Numbaa 69.'



More thoughtful silence, this time from him. Eventually, in a puzzled tone he asks her....

'You want... Garlic Chicken wif snow peas??




Two women were playing golf. One teed off and watched in horror as
her ball headed directly toward a foursome of men playing the next
hole. The ball hit one of the men.

He immediately clasped his hands together at his groin, fell to the
ground and proceeded to roll around in agony.

The woman rushed down to the man, and immediately began to
apologize. 'Please allow me to help. I'm a Physical Therapist and I know I
could relieve your pain if you'd allow me, she told him.

'Oh, no, I'll be all right. I'll be fine in a few minutes,' the man
replied. He was in obvious agony, lying in the fetal position, still
clasping his hands together at his groin.

At her persistence, however, he finally allowed her to help. She
gently took his hands away and laid them to the side, loosened his
pants and put her hands inside.

She administered tender and artful massage for several long moments
and asked, How does that feel'?

He replied: It feels great, but I still think my thumb's broken.