why we are dissapointed? (48)
claudyaBucharest, Muntenia Romania287 Threads 9 Polls 4,018 Postswhy when we meet someone in net we understand perfect chatting or emailing or talking to phone byt when we meet that person in real we are dissapointed? maybe because in net we can tell all even more lies and the reality is other?
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claudya: why when we meet someone in net we understand perfect chatting or emailing or talking to phone byt when we meet that person in real we are dissapointed? maybe because in net we can tell all even more lies and the reality is other?
Maybe some put unrealistic expectations on their view of the individual
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claudya: why when we meet someone in net we understand perfect chatting or emailing or talking to phone byt when we meet that person in real we are dissapointed? maybe because in net we can tell all even more lies and the reality is other?
I think in the cyber world we are hoping for what we want, People can portray themselves to be whoever they want to be, or we can see them for who we want them to be. Reality is different its real its staring us in the face...............sometimes its the same, sometimes its completely different 
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TurkishDelight: Maybe some put unrealistic expectations on their view of the individual
well maybe in fact we are not perfect all we have deffects and qualities
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claudya: why when we meet someone in net we understand perfect chatting or emailing or talking to phone byt when we meet that person in real we are dissapointed? maybe because in net we can tell all even more lies and the reality is other?
I am not so sure it is "lies" that are being told...I think it is just easier to be yourself on the net. I know for me, it is easier to speak freely than it is talking to someone face to face...
...doesn't sound right I know...but that is the way it is for me. Even with the man I am dating, we chat both on the phone and on the net because he is away on a business trip...he has made the comment that I "type" more freely that I talk on the phone or in person. GO FIGURE...
DISCLAIMER
*this is just my personal opinion*
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sxc666: I think in the cyber world we are hoping for what we want, People can portray themselves to be whoever they want to be, or we can see them for who we want them to be. Reality is different its real its staring us in the face...............sometimes its the same, sometimes its completely different
and sometimes happens the person who show u his picture does not like him becasue in reality is diffrent and manners same
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Simple and short answer: every rose has its thorns
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Imasquirly1: I am not so sure it is "lies" that are being told...I think it is just easier to be yourself on the net. I know for me, it is easier to speak freely than it is talking to someone face to face... ...doesn't sound right I know...but that is the way it is for me. Even with the man I am dating, we chat both on the phone and on the net because he is away on a business trip...he has made the comment that I "type" more freely that I talk on the phone or in person. GO FIGURE...
DISCLAIMER
*this is just my personal opinion*
well sometimes he lies to impress and in reality tells u ,sorry i want impress u,god i hate this ,i prefer true in faceDISCLAIMER
*this is just my personal opinion*
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vector989: Simple and short answer: every rose has its thorns
hahaah yes but sometimes some roses have huge thorns than the reality hahaah ,u understand what i want to say------ This thread is Archived ------
We also have to take responsibilty for our perceptions when chatting with someone on-line and then finally meeting them. It depends on where you are in life and how you feel within. For when that time comes, your perception is yours, not always the respobsibilty of the other
jmo
jmo
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claudya: why when we meet someone in net we understand perfect chatting or emailing or talking to phone byt when we meet that person in real we are dissapointed? maybe because in net we can tell all even more lies and the reality is other?
Maybe because once we meet face to face, the illusions are all taken away & the reality of that person is exposed for what it is. No longer is a protective filtering process via words or onomatopoeia being used, but instead it's face value time.
Face it, no one will be able to fully expose themselves as the flawed human that they are, until all pretenses are dropped and both parties are checking out the "vibe" in person.
Look at it this way...
if you are watching a black & white TV, your mind fills in the details about how things truly look.
Flip on the colours and you may discover things are very different than how you imagined them to be.
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spiceygamble: Maybe because once we meet face to face, the illusions are all taken away & the reality of that person is exposed for what it is. No longer is a protective filtering process via words or onomatopoeia being used, but instead it's face value time.
Face it, no one will be able to fully expose themselves as the flawed human that they are, until all pretenses are dropped and both parties are checking out the "vibe" in person.
Look at it this way...
if you are watching a black & white TV, your mind fills in the details about how things truly look.
Flip on the colours and you may discover things are very different than how you imagined them to be.
is true and also that in net u can be yourself in reality y think in mind what expactations has the other person from u and how she expects like u be for herFace it, no one will be able to fully expose themselves as the flawed human that they are, until all pretenses are dropped and both parties are checking out the "vibe" in person.
Look at it this way...
if you are watching a black & white TV, your mind fills in the details about how things truly look.
Flip on the colours and you may discover things are very different than how you imagined them to be.
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claudya: well sometimes he lies to impress and in reality tells u ,sorry i want impress u,god i hate this ,i prefer true in face
I do understand what you are saying here Claudya...there are many on the net that are married, or in a relationship and lie about it. Then you have the ones that don't know what the truth really is.
When I first started on CS...I got caught up in a HUGE scam....I was chatting with someone for several months...long story short...we exchanged addresses (yes, my home address) he sent me flowers...and then all the rest of the merchendise started to arrive...the only good thing that came out of this was, that one of the laptop computers that the scammer had ordered and shipped to my address actually arrived...I had even been contacted by Dell to see if I had ordered it...when I told them no...they told me it wouldn't get shipped...well...I got it within a few days...they wouldn't pay the shipping to pick it up, and the police told me that after 30 days...I could keep it free and clear...so, my son ended up with a brand new laptop...
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Displaced expectations is the term for it.
You build a mental picture after talking/chatting etc, but when you meet the person in the flesh, your expectations take a hit.
"He doesn't look as good as he did in the 2 dimensional picture" for example.
Or the as already mentioned, when chatting, some people tend to "colour" (read Lie) their own history and tastes etc.
If you expect big things of the person you're going to meet, you are sure to be let down. Hence the "displaced expectations"
BJ
You build a mental picture after talking/chatting etc, but when you meet the person in the flesh, your expectations take a hit.
"He doesn't look as good as he did in the 2 dimensional picture" for example.
Or the as already mentioned, when chatting, some people tend to "colour" (read Lie) their own history and tastes etc.
If you expect big things of the person you're going to meet, you are sure to be let down. Hence the "displaced expectations"
BJ
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Imasquirly1: I do understand what you are saying here Claudya...there are many on the net that are married, or in a relationship and lie about it. Then you have the ones that don't know what the truth really is.
When I first started on CS...I got caught up in a HUGE scam....I was chatting with someone for several months...long story short...we exchanged addresses (yes, my home address) he sent me flowers...and then all the rest of the merchendise started to arrive...the only good thing that came out of this was, that one of the laptop computers that the scammer had ordered and shipped to my address actually arrived...I had even been contacted by Dell to see if I had ordered it...when I told them no...they told me it wouldn't get shipped...well...I got it within a few days...they wouldn't pay the shipping to pick it up, and the police told me that after 30 days...I could keep it free and clear...so, my son ended up with a brand new laptop...
i am sorry yes well i realized one thing is like at lottery sometimes some of us have succes in net find their half some are little successfulWhen I first started on CS...I got caught up in a HUGE scam....I was chatting with someone for several months...long story short...we exchanged addresses (yes, my home address) he sent me flowers...and then all the rest of the merchendise started to arrive...the only good thing that came out of this was, that one of the laptop computers that the scammer had ordered and shipped to my address actually arrived...I had even been contacted by Dell to see if I had ordered it...when I told them no...they told me it wouldn't get shipped...well...I got it within a few days...they wouldn't pay the shipping to pick it up, and the police told me that after 30 days...I could keep it free and clear...so, my son ended up with a brand new laptop...
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claudya: i am sorry yes well i realized one thing is like at lottery sometimes some of us have succes in net find their half some are little successful
Just like real life then
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Chris1966: Don't include me in your 'we." I've found people get better when I meet them in person. Excluding the fakes of course.
Is the difference for you and the OP, your perception and expectations?
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TurkishDelight: Just like real life then
exactly just like in real life------ This thread is Archived ------
claudya: why when we meet someone in net we understand perfect chatting or emailing or talking to phone byt when we meet that person in real we are dissapointed? maybe because in net we can tell all even more lies and the reality is other?
An event we all run away from yet, we ply the path it is conversant with without been sensitive enough to know that we are in its territory. Why do we have to risk ourselves? This is what we do everyday without knowing. Am yet to have an answer to, why we walk on a path we know is harmful. Who is to blame? When we fall victim of this unwanted visitor? Alot have fallen into its trap unknowingly,is their experience not worth learning from that others coming behind still fall victims
Disappointment is often accompanied by hurt and the resultant effect is hatred. When we are disappointed, we feel bad about ourselves and about people who have disappointed us. Everyone at one point in time have been disappointed and this made us went through terrible psychological warfare; trying to put things back in order but, doing this is never an easy task. We ask ourselves, why did I trust him/her in the first place? People have their own issues to attend to hence, they forget about others.
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Created: Dec 2008
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