is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on? (32)

Oct 17, 2008 7:17 PM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
derrywoman
derrywomanderrywomanderry, Derry Ireland60 Threads 2,869 Posts
I know the answer to this,,,but it hurts,when ur up front,to see how as u thought u knew a person,, then how they react,,,and can play games with you then,when they realized,thats its just friendship u want, and then u wonder why,u even go there,i mean open urself up..to be a friend,,to get a slap on the face,,,has anyone else experinence this on here?crying
Oct 17, 2008 7:19 PM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
Elise39
Elise39Elise39Portumna, Galway Ireland21 Threads 667 Posts
derrywoman: I know the answer to this,,,but it hurts,when ur up front,to see how as u thought u knew a person,, then how they react,,,and can play games with you then,when they realized,thats its just friendship u want, and then u wonder why,u even go there,i mean open urself up..to be a friend,,to get a slap on the face,,,has anyone else experinence this on here?
..no..sigh
Oct 17, 2008 8:17 PM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
jampet
jampetjampetwexford, Wexford Ireland28 Threads 1 Polls 2,549 Posts
works both ways- there are times when you know they are into you, but you know it can't work, regardless of how you feel about them, because they just are 'different' enough from you, to make a difference.
when there is someone you really like, but realise the difference in your upbringing, and outlook on life, youir interests are so dis-similar that it just can't work, but you are still attracted to them and their way of thinking- beats me- what do you do??dunno sigh
Oct 17, 2008 8:54 PM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
mcneillm
mcneillmmcneillmEnnis, Clare Ireland2 Threads 1,250 Posts
Having been on both sides, i'd say...

Be upfront, make your intentions clear, leave things lie, give them instead the decision to contact you...


If they do contact you, and they start with their games again, then jusy get rid....
Oct 18, 2008 1:57 AM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
hasagoodheart
hasagoodhearthasagoodheartGalway, Ireland23 Threads 410 Posts
derrywoman: I know the answer to this,,,but it hurts,when ur up front,to see how as u thought u knew a person,, then how they react,,,and can play games with you then,when they realized,thats its just friendship u want, and then u wonder why,u even go there,i mean open urself up..to be a friend,,to get a slap on the face,,,has anyone else experinence this on here?


The greatest gift in life is honesty. When we are trully honest with another we cannot hurt them. Maybe that is why dishonest people can and do hurt us. So yes, being upfront is the only way to be. hug
Oct 18, 2008 4:11 AM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
omurchu22
omurchu22omurchu22Dundalk, Louth Ireland12 Threads 720 Posts
hug hug

Hope things work out better for you soon Derry

comfort
Oct 18, 2008 5:36 AM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
ladylumps
ladylumpsladylumpsDublin, Ireland105 Threads 4 Polls 9,454 Posts
Always be upfront and say it how it is if they cant appreciate your honesty then they are not worthy of your friendship. The reaction and games are generally an attempt to regain control after you have wounded their ego no one wants to feel rejected but the best thing is to say it at once and not give anyone the wrong signals. teddybear
Oct 18, 2008 5:38 AM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
omurchu22
omurchu22omurchu22Dundalk, Louth Ireland12 Threads 720 Posts
Hi ll Do you like my sons photo grin
Oct 18, 2008 5:40 AM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
ladylumps
ladylumpsladylumpsDublin, Ireland105 Threads 4 Polls 9,454 Posts
omurchu22: Hi ll Do you like my sons photo


Oh thats bad, I wonder who thought up that picture I know I shouldnt laugh but rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing I cant help it ,
Oct 18, 2008 5:42 AM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
bluebelle4000
bluebelle4000bluebelle4000Meath, Ireland46 Threads 6,001 Posts
omurchu22: Hi ll Do you like my sons photo


I cant help laughing either.......... and i know i shouldnt.... its the look on his face rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
Oct 18, 2008 5:46 AM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
Irishminx
IrishminxIrishminxCork, Ireland16 Threads 2,282 Posts
hasagoodheart: The greatest gift in life is honesty. When we are trully honest with another we cannot hurt them. Maybe that is why dishonest people can and do hurt us. So yes, being upfront is the only way to be.


One's hurt is always about the person feeling it!
Oct 18, 2008 6:45 AM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
mcneillm: Having been on both sides, i'd say...

Be upfront, make your intentions clear, leave things lie, give them instead the decision to contact you...If they do contact you, and they start with their games again, then jusy get rid....


i agree here, i've been on both sides here too...
in my experience the longer u leave it the worse it gets so for ur own sake, if u dont see it goin anywhere you hav to stop it because u are the 1 that will get hurt in the end... teddybear
Oct 18, 2008 7:54 AM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
hasagoodheart
hasagoodhearthasagoodheartGalway, Ireland23 Threads 410 Posts
Irishminx: One's hurt is always about the person feeling it!


Minx,

I agree absolutely. All that anyone can really do is to put us in touch with a pain that is inside of us. I'm lucky in that I've never been deliberately hurt by any woman. Suppose it because I've never met a woman who was deliberately dishonest, but I do know men who have met them.

Peter
hug hug hug hug hug hug
Oct 18, 2008 7:59 AM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
derrywoman
derrywomanderrywomanderry, Derry Ireland60 Threads 2,869 Posts
Thanx guys for ur comments,,and i totally agree with them all,honesty is the best policy i think,,and my motto in life,don,t do to others wot u wud,nt like done to urself.The truth sometimes hurts,which we all know,,but its better be truthful and honest,than be false and lead a person on falsely,all for the sake of not wanting to hurt them,time heals,and hopefully in time,the person in question, appreciate the honesty and openness,and accept my friendship,thanx againteddybear
Nov 12, 2008 7:41 AM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
galwaygirl64
galwaygirl64galwaygirl64Loughrea, Galway Ireland1 Threads 10 Posts
hasagoodheart: The greatest gift in life is honesty. When we are trully honest with another we cannot hurt them. Maybe that is why dishonest people can and do hurt us. So yes, being upfront is the only way to be.


This is not always true...i'm always honest to a fault..but the last guy i went out on A date with,(not from any site) said and i quote "you can't go around hurting ppl like that".. after just 1 date he became somewhat overbearing with texts so I basically nipped it straight away cos I obviously didn't feel the same...
Having said that I wouldn't change being honest ever, it's who I am and I appreciate the same from others... So Yes Honesty Is Most Definately the best Policy...thumbs up
Nov 12, 2008 1:05 PM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
stevieboy76
stevieboy76stevieboy76cork/dublin, Dublin Ireland5 Threads 1 Polls 14 Posts
at the risk of repeating myself:

be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...
Nov 12, 2008 2:15 PM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
DAVIO
DAVIODAVIOdublin, Dublin Ireland11 Threads 184 Posts
yes much better to be up front as soon as you know your not into someone ,games and crap like that is just mean
Nov 12, 2008 2:32 PM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
wexlady41
wexlady41wexlady41Wexford, Ireland47 Threads 5 Polls 7,935 Posts
Can't really give an opinion on this. I assume you're talking about someone you've had a few dates with and discover there is no "chemistry".

Have not had a date in years so haven't had experience of this. Soo sorry you did though.



comfort
Nov 12, 2008 2:32 PM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
bluebelle4000
bluebelle4000bluebelle4000Meath, Ireland46 Threads 6,001 Posts
stevieboy76: at the risk of repeating myself:

be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...be up front...


stevie do u think we should be upfront

rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing
Nov 12, 2008 3:38 PM CST is it best to be upfront,,with a person,,than lead them on?
wexlady41
wexlady41wexlady41Wexford, Ireland47 Threads 5 Polls 7,935 Posts
DAVIO: thats a bit harsh on his part,i wouldnt take it as an insult if a girl said she wanted to be friends ,however if i had been seeing a person for a while and tings seemed to be goin good and then they turned round and said that id be annoyed ,id rather be just told that at the start,and that phrase 'youre a lovely guy but' i hate that one



Why would you be annoyed? If you were seeing someone for a while and realised it was ok but not going to end in happy ever after would you just keep on seeing that person so as not to "annoy" them?

Or do men know in advance that they are going to love someone or even like them enough to be partners for life?

Do they expect the same from women?

I don't think it's possible to know that until you've been seeing each other for a while. It's only after a while that we notice things about others that we may or may not like. We may like them as a friend but not feel a chemistry or a spark or whatever you like to call it.

Sometimes "you're a nice guy" actually means you're a nice guy. But we can't be in a relationship with every nice guy we meet.






dunno
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by derrywoman (60 Threads)
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