SCOTLAND Group Forum
To promote Scotland and it's culture, scenery, history, humour, poetry, music, literature, art, architecture .... etc, etc. This is for everybody, not just the Scots, it is not a club or clique. Please contribute as you see fit. I have initially invited a few fellow Scots to join, in the hope they can contribute to build up a good data base of information should any of you globe trotting str...
read more
Scotish Humour ( Video clips ) (38)
---- IMAGE REMOVED because photobucket.com no longer allows embedded images ----
---- IMAGE REMOVED because photobucket.com no longer allows embedded images ----
---- IMAGE REMOVED because photobucket.com no longer allows embedded images ----
---- IMAGE REMOVED because photobucket.com no longer allows embedded images ----
... "The Birth of the Kilt"
Being Scottish is about driving a German car to an Irish pub
for a Belgian beer, then travelling home, grabbing an Indian curry
or a Turkish kebab on the way, to sit on Swedish furniture and
watch American shows on a Japanese TV.
And the most Scottish thing of all? Suspicion of all things foreign!
Only in Scotland can a pizza get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in Scotland do supermarkets make sick people walk all the
way to the back of the shop to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.
Only in Sotland do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries
and a DIET coke.
Only in Scotland do banks leave both doors open and chain their
pens to the counters.
Only in Scotland do we leave cars worth thousands of pounds on
the driveway and lock our junk and cheap lawn mower in the garage.
Only in Scotland do we use answering machines to screen calls
and then have call waiting so we won't miss a call from someone
we didn't want to talk to in the first place.
Only in Scotland are there disabled parking places in front of
a skating rink.
NOT TO MENTION..
3 Scots die each year testing if a 9v battery works on their tongue.
142 Scots were injured in 2005 by not removing all pins from new shirts.
58 Scots are injured each year by using sharp knives instead of
screwdrivers.
31 Scots have died since 2001 by watering their Christmas tree
while the fairy lights were plugged in.
19 Scots have died in the last 3 years believing that Christmas decorations were chocolate.
Scottish Hospitals reported 4 broken arms last year after Xmas
cracker-pulling accidents.
18 Scots had serious burns in 2005 trying on a new jumper with
a lit cigarette in their mouth.
A massive 543 Scots were admitted to A&E in the last two years
after trying to open bottles of beer with their teeth.
5 Scots were injured last year in accidents involving out-of-control
Scalextric cars.
and finally...
In 2005 eight Scots were admitted to hospital with fractured skulls incurred whilst throwing up into the toilet.
SCOTLAND - Love it, or Leave it!
You are right Andy, lets bring this up to date.
He is currently one of my favourites also........
The World Stands Up - Frankie Boyle
---- IMAGE REMOVED because photobucket.com no longer allows embedded images ----
Reverend I.M.Jolly
Maynards Wine Gums - Set the Juice Loose!
Hamlet Cigar Advert ( with Scots actor Gregor Fisher )
Irn Bru: Raoul bouncing up and down!
Maynards Wine Gums - Set the Juice Loose!
love all these clips. Haven't seen them for years! That Hamlet Cigar one is a cracker! That happens in all those booths - you are never ready when the flash goes off!! I always end up looking like a mad axe murderer woman!!
I am sure that "Raoul" is on this site! Sure I've had flowers and e-mails from him!
For those who are unsure, watch this ........
comedians and sketches - the search for the best, in aid of the ScotsCare charity - 5th November 2007
Upstage Downstage, Upstairs Downstairs
The Stanley Baxter Big Picture Show
"Back" Series 7 Episode 6
Rab C Nesbitt: "Community" Series 7 Episode 5
Andy Stewart! Funny Scottish Song!