by Unknown
Jan 2011 405 Views 10 comments
World Gone Wrong
Morbid fascination with a world gone wrong
Brokenness, separation written in a love song
The wisdom of fools is taken for granted
Coin operated love feeds the desire to be wanted
Waking up face down from a night full of dreams
Unable to decipher what any of it means
Dead flowers on the hearthstone, the tome of love
Skeletons in the closet dancing up above
The wheels of life continue to spin around
Following the suns orbit for the lost and the found
Tragedy and heartache a recipe for love
Where mercy and grace abound from above
Brokenness, separation written in a love song
The wisdom of fools is taken for granted
Coin operated love feeds the desire to be wanted
Waking up face down from a night full of dreams
Unable to decipher what any of it means
Dead flowers on the hearthstone, the tome of love
Skeletons in the closet dancing up above
The wheels of life continue to spin around
Following the suns orbit for the lost and the found
Tragedy and heartache a recipe for love
Where mercy and grace abound from above
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Posted: Jan 2011
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Comments (10)
This certainly sounds quite angry, but I am struggling with some of your narrative. What do you mean when you say "The wisdom of fools is taken for granted"? That is a real mixture of metaphors.
Most people don't associate fools with wisdom, let alone take it for granted. And if skeletons are in the closet, just was is it they are dancing above? Also, tragedy and heartache a recipe for love? Not in most peoples recipe book.
Don't worry about this critique, I don't understand modern art either, and Tracey Emin has made a fortune exhibiting stuff that nobody else can understand.
Regards
Fellsman
I told you I was hopeless as a critic. Also, being rather new on here myself, I didn't realise you were a newcomer.
Cheers, and welcome to PC.
Regards
fellsman
nice write rebel
Waking up face down from a night full of dreams Unable to decipher what any of it means is not only a powerful image but also a position in which many often find themselves. What is there for a poet to do to right a world gone wrong except write? Nicely penned, mixed metaphors (I had a similar thought-provoking reaction) and all. Welcome to Poet's Corner!
Your poem, your words at that time...that is poetry.
A good poem I understood, followed with interest to its close....but then it depends on my frame of mind too....Niah