I came into this world without a frown or a smile,

looking back now it seems a very long while,

my early years pushed from pillar to post,

should be seen and never heard,

was I there or a ghost.

My family disjointed-estranged, poles apart,

I thought this was normal right from the start,

love was a word others told,

hugs of emotion left me cold.

Problem child I heard them say,

lock him up and throw him away,

unfamiliar strange was the lyric the tune,

as the door closed behind me,

in my dads attic room.

No carpet no drapes dirty sheet on my bed,

not even a pillow to rest my head,

a broken window let in the breeze,

I cried into the night,

I would surely freeze.

I needed the toilet I banged upon the door,

my only response was a distant roar,

no bulb in the fixture illuminated my plight,

alone in the dark I cried into the night.

Next morning footsteps I had to wait,

the door would creak open and in slid a plate,

baked beans steaming bent over the heat,

cockroaches scurried as they watched me eat.

I was only 5 years old but the memory is clear,

what had I done to end up in here,

nobody loved me my dreams said at night,

alone in the dark in my dads attic out of sight.