is fairness important in a relationship ? and how much? (63)
Scott1812: 99% of the time relationships are like anything else in life you get out of it what you put into it!
true
Obstinance_Works: The video and study state that the unpredictability of giving and taking is what makes an animal or person more attached. Fairness would be getting what you deserve all of the time - which would be too predictable!
In the video clip I watched, one was consistently given a piece of cucumber while the other was consistently given a grape. That's quite predictable. It's just not fair in the sense that they do the same task but do not get the same reward.
Who decides what this unspecified person actually deserves? Who decides this? A lot of people have a very expansive idea of what they deserve and what they are entitled to. A lot of proposed schemes to ensure that people get "what they deserve" skip right over this basic question. Who gets to decide who deserves what?
More Threads
wanting beyond need
Karen McDougal - Playmate Model will testify in Hush Money Trial
men's perspective towards women
Why is this shameful?
Ladies
Democrats destroyed America
The weird and the random facts around the world
Unions support Democrats!
More Proof The GOP is a Criminal Organization
your favorite topic?
More Threads
Report threads that break rules, are offensive, or contain fighting. Staff may not be aware of the forum abuse, and cannot do anything about it unless you tell us about it. click to report forum abuse »
People often seem to think equality is about treating everyone the same. If I made everyone a size 12 dress, I might be treating everyone the same, but I'm not treating everyone equally as only a few people would have a usable item of clothing. So what is fairness? What is 50/50?
I also think there is an illusion that if you put a number to something, it's somehow been quantified even if that number has been assigned subjectively, inconsistently and somewhat randomly.
Jac, these a excellent questions. to me, part of fairness is considering everyone's (or a partner's) feelings and contributions, value & making sure that all are getting appropriate recognition (with a partner that might mean adequate couple/ listening time) and favoritism is not being used (for a couple...putting him first before others)
for a start