Well Dande for a start then theres Joy then coldinwisconsin then dakota then .............................................................................................................................. Damn to many to list ..........................................
One night, an 87-year-old woman came home from Bingo to find her husband in bed with another woman. Angry, she became violent and ended up pushing him off the balcony of their apartment, killing him instantly. When brought before the court on charges of murder, she was asked if she had anything to say to defend herself.
"Well, Your Honor," she replied coolly. "I figured that at 92, if he could make love to another woman, he could fly
Looks is the 1st thing you see and plays a very important part as the first attractant when meeting someone, Without it would you want to start a relationship ?
I like a good semi-sweet white wine but alas all I have is a Ice cold beer in the fridge but to early for that yet as I want to take the bike out for the day
Skype will install and run under Vista. You'll be able to call others, and even the beta video feature will work.
However, if anyone tries to call your computer, they will receive a "rejection" message saying that you only accept calls from people in your contact list. This will happen even if the caller is in your contact list, or you have configured Skype to accept calls from all callers.
The reason for this is the Windows Firewall. For some reason, it will allow outbound internet access by Skype, but it blocks in-bound calls. To correct this, open Windows Firewall in the Control Panel, select "Allow a program through the firewall," and manually check Skype.
An Irishman's been at a pub all night drinking. The bartender finally says that the bar is closed. So he stands up to leave and falls flat on his face. He figures he'll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up. Once outside he stands up and falls flat on his face. So he crawls home and at the door stands up and falls flat on his face. He crawls through the door and up the stairs. When he reaches his bed he tries one more time to stand up. This time he falls right into bed and is sound asleep. He awakens the next morning to his wife standing over him shouting at him. "So, you've been out drinking again!!" "How did you know?" he asks. "The pub called, you left your wheelchair there again."
A man stumbles up to the only other patron in a bar and asks if he could buy him a drink. "Why of course," comes the reply. The first man then asks: "Where are you from?" "I'm from Ireland," replies the second man. The first man responds: "You don't say, I'm from Ireland too! Let's have another round to Ireland." "Of course," replies the second man. Curious, the first man then asks: "Where in Ireland are you from?" "Dublin," comes the reply. "I can't believe it," says the first man. "I'm from Dublin too! Let's have another drink to Dublin." "Of course," replies the second man. Curiosity again strikes and the first man asks: "What school did you go to?" "Saint Mary's," replies the second man, "I graduated in '62." "This is unbelievable!", the first man says. "I went to Saint Mary's and I graduated in '62, too!" About that time in comes one of the regulars and sits down at the bar. "What's been going on?" he asks the bartender. "Nothing much," replies the bartender. "The O'Mally twins are drunk again."
I had eighteen bottles of whiskey in my cellar and was told by my wife to empty the contents of each and every bottle down the sink, or else... I said I would and proceeded with the unpleasant task. I withdrew the cork from the first bottle and poured the contents down the sink with the exception of one glass, which I drank. I then withdrew the cork from the second bottle and did likewise with it, with the exception of one glass, which I drank. I then withdrew the cork from the third bottle and poured the whiskey down the sink which I drank. I pulled the cork from the fourth bottle down the sink and poured the bottle down the glass, which I drank. I pulled the bottle from the cork of the next and drank one sink out of it, and threw the rest down the glass. I pulled the sink out of the next glass and poured the cork down the bottle. Then I corked the sink with the glass, bottled the drink and drank the pour. When I had everything emptied, I steadied the house with one hand, counted the glasses, corks, bottles, and sinks with the other, which were twenty-nine, and as the houses came by I counted them again, and finally I had all the houses in one bottle, which I drank. I'm not under the affluence of incohol as some thinkle peep I am. I'm not half as thunk as you might drink. I fool so feelish I don't know who is me, and the drunker I stand here, the longer I get.
Dknew Forum Posts (7,077)
May he always have that single malt that he loved so much.
Need a coffee icon on here 
RE: Communism....
I hate em because of all the Beautiful women they hid behind the Iron curtain