RE: The Excuse Game!

Kill the spider water the plants, feed the hamster, close the curtains., go a mile down the road and get some milk (the corner shop's already closed).... and put the garbage bin out on the way back?

Would you marry me? Just so all this falls within the 'comfort zone' of 'normal'?

I'll try that again - I got all confused and forgot the bread.

RE: The Excuse Game!

Here...sorry a little baileys got in that cup...I'll drink it for ya!

While you are feeding that hamster and killing that spider, would you zip over to the store for a quart of milk and some bread?grin

Kill the spider water the plants, feed the hamster, close the curtains., go a mile down the road and get some milk (the corner shop's already closed).... and put the garbage bin out on the way back?

Would you marry me? Just so all this falls within the 'comfort zone' of 'normal'?

RE: The Excuse Game!

Of course, after a few more beers that'll be an easy pleasure.

Will you fetch me a couple more beers please?

RE: The Excuse Game!

whoops, while your dialing, would you call my mother?





Sorry ladies, I'm a man and you know....men, multi-tasking.

Would you male me a coffee please?

RE: The Excuse Game!

Sorry it's 10:26pm and the Corner Shop closed at 10.


You've got the remote - switch stations to Dave please - there's a good comedy on.

RE: Democrats want to kill old people

They'll be rabidly at each other on here in a few hours. But be positive - if the loony Republicans and the nuttier Democrats rip each other apart ("The right to bear arms" is a good thing for these people) at least they'll stop clogging the International Forum up with domestic US politics crapola rolling on the floor laughing

RE: HELP...I REALLY NEED AN ANSWER.....

That'd be me then? NASA and The European Space Agency are predicting big solar storms in 2011-12 - which could cause huge electro magnetic impulses taking out anything vaguely computerised, power lines generators the works. The most advanced countries will be the worst hit - bit apparently the USA will suffer the worst.

No power - trucks cars etc unable to work navigation systems out mobile phones u/s no internet...

RE: what is the different between woman and wine?

Isn't there supposed to be a bit in this thread where a French woman appears and claims French women are the best women in the world? laugh

RE: what is the different between woman and wine?

rolling on the floor laughing Great minds... we're going to get flayed - but hey thumbs up

RE: what is the different between woman and wine?

One's spelt wine and the other's spelt whine? So just an 'h'?

RE: What's the scariest car you've ever driven? ..part II

Scary lifts!

I was hitch hiking in Germany in my teens and teamed up with a German kid Hans… we were trying to get a lift onto the autobahn South: Hans was headed for Freibourg I was going to Switzerland.

This huge Mercedes pulled up with a screech of tyres and the door was opened – we got in. The windows were all closed, it was a summer’s evening and the aircon fan was on low and the passenger – was chain smoking. After about 5-6 klicks on the autobahn it was apparent why – the driver was totally drunk – doing about 120-130 mph and kept turning round to talk to us or turning sideways to talk to his wife who was constantly telling him to look at the road, slow down and that he shouldn’t be driving.

After about half an hour’s drive he pulled off the autobahn and weaving all over the road, managed to navigate to a mid-sized hotel; he owned it! He fed us, got us totally drunk and apologised for his drunk-driving. He gave us a twin room and – apart from bursting in at 4am and insisting we had a nightcap of schnapps – was a perfect host.

Next morning we had breakfast with his wife. Half way through breakfast he came storming down stairs and whack! Walked straight in to a pillar... we tried not to laugh but his wife did – and after that it was OK. He was still drunk as a skunk and couldn’t find his shoes – so shouted until the chef’s young son arrived - and promised him money when he found them. Have to say they were superbly generous people, but I thought we were gonners on the autobahn.

RE: Do younger women like older men? more than 5 years older.

Or buy jump leads and a booster pack...

RE: Im new here

God Golly! It's Molly - Welcome - hope you enjoy the forums.

RE: Is the Holy Land ,..Holy?

There's a BIG clue in the name.

RE: Favourite quotes

"Wagner's opera began at six o'clock. Three hours later I looked down at my watch and realised it was six thirty." Mark Twain

RE: How Do you like the name: Sarah?

rolling on the floor laughing rolling on the floor laughing

It used to be a bit of a 'posh bird's ' name - not sure any more...

RE: Do younger women like older men? more than 5 years older.

Some people get old in their 20s OP and some people are still young in their 70s - I wouldn't get 'hung up' on age - find someone you like who likes you.

RE: Hitchiker's Guide ...

What a fabulous woman, clearly you're 42.

RE: What's the scariest car you've ever driven? ..part II

thumbs up

RE: What's the scariest car you've ever driven? ..part II

Yes, but that aside, he's right, you do have a great sense of humour - but with a bum like that I suppose you need one rolling on the floor laughing .

RE: What's the scariest car you've ever driven? ..part II

Somehow... I just knew you'd respond. Did you ask anyone in the shop "Does my bum look big in this?"

RE: What's the scariest car you've ever driven? ..part II

yes - but did it have a 'Health & Safety' sticker on it - "Not suitable for size 16 and above bums"?

RE: What's the scariest car you've ever driven? ..part II

I bought the 944 S2 after the 944 and it was like a different car - better handling and 0-60 in 6. The SAAB was the 9000 2.3L and handled really well for its size had a huge 'trunk' and sat 5 in great comfort - oh and would out accelerate a Ferrari Tessarossa between 50-80.

I am in the process of selling toe 8 valve Porsche and drive a somewhat sedate but comfortable Rover 75 diesel.

So what does the Reverend Rev? We see tales of pick up trucks and hosses and gun toting....

RE: What MEN want...

thumbs up laugh

And substitute wine for the milk?

RE: Really?

Hmmm if you'd specifically asked the guy "Are you really single and not divorced or separated, then he's a liar and well shot. But if you asked him 'Are you single?' - he may well think of himself as single.

I suspect a few other things weren't right on your date too.

RE: Why do women smoke, when they spend a fortune on makeup

Clearly a sophisticated man of huge intellect and mindset. Still I suppose there's work for double glazing salesmen world-wide.

RE: Hitchiker's Guide ...

Funny how we differ in tastes - I thought the film was poor (so was the TV series) the Vogons were tame and the whole thing a bit (a lot) Hollywoodish. Marvin was cute though and the Busby Barclay scene with the dolphins - superb. Enjoy!

RE: Names of places - same rule applies - use last or last couple of letters 2

Aberavon (South Wales)

RE: What's the scariest car you've ever driven? ..part II

I had a Porsche 944 and someone had set the rear suspension to track day hard. which didn't suit the potholed British roads. Hit a bump coming out of a bend and the rear end used to jump out of line on every bump - the back end would go airbourne; it was though OK when I backed the suspension settings off 2 notches to what it should have been.

I had a SAAB 9000 Turbo - which was a limited edition preceding the issue of the Aero version. It had lumpier cams than the standard and a turbo the size of Pluto. It had no traction control and in the wet - starting anywhere in 1st was a risk and it would spin its wheels in 1st 2nd and 3rd.

But - the scariest car I ever drove was a British Leyland Marina 1.8 TC automatic. It was front heavy and the gearbox had a mind of its own - it would often change up in the middle of a greasy roundabout - with a huge jarring 'thump!' and send the back of the car sideways. The brakes were naff and the suspension was horrible too - the only confidence you could ever have - was one that it would try to catch you out. Not a relaxing drive at all

RE: Why do women smoke, when they spend a fortune on makeup

The only hysteria I see in that is yours. Genetics and sun exposure are far more prevalent causes of skin damage and premature ageing and wrinkling than smoking. And even if a woman does smoke, she still has the right and probably the want to slap on the expensive gunk that may or may not prevent a loss of elasticity in the skin.

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