Don’t tell me you don’t care
The sun will stop shinning
Don’t stop loving me
The moon will not come up
The stars will fall from the heavens
Don’t stop talking to me
Tell me something
Just don’t stop loving me
The quite nights go by slow
Just thinking about you
Please if you don’t care
Tell me so
Don’t let my heart stop beating
Don’t let my blood grow cold
Let me shine like I used to
Just let me know
Tear drops fall from my eyes
They won’t stop
Let my heart be
Just tell me
That you don’t love me anymore
I will be on my way
With my heart broken
With tears in my eyes
Thoughts come to my mind when reading the blogs and the forums. Some are good and I can feel the laughter in my heart. Somethings make me sad to read, how people are looking for their loves. Somethings make me upset to read, like fighting between people who don't know each other.
These things come to my mind when reading each blog, each post. We take each others words and move them around our minds. Take and add a few. The thoughts we come up with at times is unbelievable. Sometimes they are funny, and then sometimes they are sad.
I have been on the Internet for a long time, I have been in chat rooms, been on messagers. I talk to people all over the world, and find myself seeking more. Not for a relationship but for the lessons one can learn from reading about their life's. Its amazing to see the other side and see people just like me. Never in my whole life did I ever think about it.
But words are powerful sometimes they can tear you apart. If you are not reading them correctly, if you are looking for something. Or if you are trying to find love.... You read between the lines and make something that is not there, there. Understanding the mind, the words that one speaks or writes is like trying to understand the meaning of life.
Remember when you read someones words you are seeing them and their moods. I can sit and listen to their voice in my head of course I have never heard it but everyone has a voice. I even see their reactions. I can hear and see this in their words..... Words are powerful.... yet they are calming when they are written right........ so before posting remember two simple things... check for spelling errors and reread what you have wrote......sometimes a couple of times just to see if it would offend.......
Love and Peace
Mary
Once in awhile we connect with someone, in this moment we give a little of our hearts away. A piece maybe as little as the top of my pinky. Each time you talk you give a little more, even stronger feelings come to surface. Which way do I go you ask yourself in a low voice so no one will hear you. Do I run away, or stay to see what happens. Then something deep inside of you begins moving around, feelings of uneasiness makes you what to get sick comes over you. When things become just to much to handle, you pack up your heart and hit the rode. You have done this many times you can’t even count them on your fingers, you don’t have that many fingers.!!!!!! Then you settle down once more alone, thinking why did I do that. Then you answer yourself saying it was better for you to hurt early on, you know something is going to happen that will make you hurt anyways . Why not now,… My answer….. Run away from it all live a life alone, its easier then getting into a relationship you know won’t work….. I have loved many times and I will love many times more….. But must I run away from the pain, or do I stand and take it like I should to learn the lessons in this life.
My question and the answer is within myself……. I loved him very much…. But it just won’t work…..
Mary
This time
I won't show I'm vulnerable
This time
I won't give in first
This time
I will hold out with my love
This time
I will not be hurt
I'm gonna love myself
More than anyone else
I'm gonna treat me right
I'm gonna make you say
That you love me first
And you'll be the one with the most to lose tonight
This time
This time
I won't let my emotions rule my life
This time
I'm gonna keep my heart locked safe inside
This time
I'm gonna be my own best friend
This time
I'm gonna be the one
To win
Your love
Your affection
To hide
My fear
Of rejection
This time
This is the lyrics of This time by Tracy Chapman, she has been in my head.
Mary
I made the mistake of getting into something that wasn't good. I knew it wasn't good in the begining. I am so stupid that I could kick myself in the butt a few hundred times maybe that would wake my brain up.
I did learn something this time it took a few pains of the heart to actually learn a lesson I guess I needed to learn.
I started talking to a man who was married I got caught up in the words he used. I did meet him and he was very nice. But something inside told me not to go there so I didn't. I still talked to him on emails promised him I wouldn't leave his side for anything. Bad promise I finally did what I should have done from the start and told him that I didn't have any trust in him. 0 is what I put in that email. Told him that I couldn't talk to him anymore tell he got a divorce and get rid of the other women he was talking to.
Now I am sure that I couldn't trust him,because I set up another account in another name and put him in my favorites over on the other site. Wrong or not I did what I needed to do for myself. To see if this man was telling me the truth. He wasn't So I ended the online friendship with that in mind. I cryed because I always cry when losing someone in my life. I am emotional inside and out. Can't help it I trust everyone and always get hurt. My heart hurts right now bad but I do know I did what was the best before it went any father down the line. I am grateful that God gave me this lesson a few times. Now I can move on look for someone that is right for me and not looking for someone else to build their egos up.
Not every man is this way only a few. But I tend to trust the bad and ugly before I trust the good and sweet. Remember something in your life if you don't remember nothing else. Love is for two people who share the same things inside the heart. When you are looking look with your heart and head and listen to your head first......your heart always loves...and doesn't have eyes.. and common sence. love you all
Mary
The warmth of his breathe against my cheek.
Sends passions throughout my soul.
Waking many senses that my heart has hidden.
The taste of bittersweet on my lips.
As he kissed my mouth with deep passion.
His warm hands moved down my body.
Softly touching my breast.
Oh what a song of sweetness dancing in my mind.
The warmth of his body touching my flesh.
The flames dance around us as we melt into each other.
Our hearts beat as one the dance is on.
Desires build, hotter and hotter.
As we danced with passion,In each others arms.
-
So if Soul Mates are our spiritual family, what are Twin Flames? Twin Flames are ourselves in another body. When Souls chose to enter into physicality, they were split into masculine and feminine aspects. Please note, I did not say male and female, because throughout our incarnations, we will be in both genders of bodies. When we first leave the Light to enter into physicality, we will connect with our Twin Flame. This is done so we will not feel so totally alone in the human experience. After this we go our separate ways and grow lifetime after lifetime in experience and wisdom until we are ready to break free of the bonds of physicality and mortality. When we have reached this stage we have the opportunity to reconnect with our “other half” or Twin Flame. The chances are that we meet our Twin Flame briefly in many lifetimes, but one or both of us are not ready for the intensity of this connection. When both halves of the whole are ready to come back together and meet they will discover that in that lifetime they have lead almost parallel lives. The events of their lives will mirror each other almost exactly. They may have come from very similar families and family dynamics. They may have had similar schooling or lack thereof. They may have almost identical careers. They may even have previous marriages and divorces within weeks of each other. When Twin Flames get to know each other, they will feel as if the other is reading their life script.
Once in relationship, the bond between Twin Flames can only be compared to the bond between identical twins. They are aware of each others thoughts, feelings, desires and needs at a level that is hard to imagine. The depth of Love is such that to be apart even for a day is a hardship. What is meant by that is that their hearts literally hurt when they are separated from each other. Even if only for the work day. It is this depth of Love that reminds them of the Oneness of Light to which they are returning. By anchoring this Love in the physical, not only are they preparing for their own ascension, but they are also leaving an imprint for others to follow in time for their own.
All relationships serve a purpose and should be honored and appreciated for what they have to offer you in your personal spiritual growth. Thank the person and the experiences for all that you have had the opportunity to learn and clear. Know that ALL relationships are sacred, because they bring us closer to the Light of All That Is.
On this day 53 years ago, I was born to my parents.
In heaven I was talking to God, he asked me if I wanted to come down to earth and live a life with other souls. I told him yes, I would just love to do that. So he sit me on his knee and showed me, what my new life was going to be. He showed me my parents, my brother , showed me my children, my grands and how things were going to be in this life. He also showed me what my purpose was. Then he sent me off , I ended up in my mothers womb, I was there for 9 months growing, kicking learning from the angles. The day came when I felt the first pain, the one that was going to send me out into the world. As I was going thur this Jesus came and held my hand, telling me everything would be ok. I saw a light a bright light as I was going thur the tunnel to earth. First my head, then my shoulders, then the rest of me. I was quickly taken away and put in a little bed. It was cold, and I could hear voices around me, I was so confused I cryed. I remember looking around seeing all these faces, and there was one that I knew, it was my mom. They handed me to her and I seen tears of joy running down her face. Oh now I know how it feels to be alive, and how I felt loved...
So Happy Birthday to me.....
And to anyone who was born in July.....
If anyone would like the link to the site , I will be glad to send it to you. Just email....
Mary
Relationships are mirrors that help us to learn more about ourselves. They are the most challenging and the most rewarding aspects of life. The more intimate the relationship the greater the opportunity for growth we are given.
There are three different types of relationship mirrors. One is the mirror of who you were. This mirror gives you the opportunity to see how far you have come, the chance to experience the karma that you have already cleared. So don’t get caught up in this relationship worried about why it is coming back at this time, thank it and let it go.
A second type of relationship is the one that is mirroring where you are now on your path. If an issue or person has an emotional “charge” to it, then you still have work to do. This mirror is the hardest to look at because it reflects the issues you have not yet finished in your life. These are the things that we are the most blind to.
The last type of relationship is the one that mirrors your potential. This allows you to have a glimpse at who you could be, if you wanted to. This person is usually someone that you idealize and put on a pedestal or look up to.
Take a look at your various relationships and see which group they fall into. By knowing this you will gain insight into yourself. Self understanding is the entire reason for these mirrors, not to ‘fix’ the other person, but to look at yourself and learn.
The primary reason for most relationships is so you can work on your spiritual self and your karma! So with that said, the more you clear up issues for yourself, the more you ARE the ‘right’ person; the more you will attract the person you are looking for
As you continue to work on yourself you will meet many potential partners, in every facet of life. From the point of view of Love relationships, though you may meet someone and the connection was so strong that it almost takes your breath away. You may have the experience of knowing someone’s thoughts and feelings, almost before they do. When this happens you probably have connected with someone who is your Soul Mate or perhaps even your Twin Flame.
So now, what is a Soul Mate. Soul Mates are those beings that we have had connections with in past lives. They may have been our parents, siblings, spouses, friends, etc. and they have agreed to come back to join us again. The reason for this rejoining is so that we can each achieve balance in our lives. Our Soul Mates represent our spiritual family. By connecting with them we are reminded of the resonance of our Soul and also they help us to wake up and remember our purpose. Most of the time when we think of Soul Mates we are thinking of love relationships, but we can have Soul Mates that join us for business partnerships, healing relationships, and yes, love relationships. Any relationship we can have is open to the arena of Soul Mates. They may be a teacher or minister or counselor who comes into our life and touches it deeply. Soul Mates are truly our friends from many lifetimes who come to play again with on this Earth. Often they come into our lives for a specific time or event. They may even come into a love relationship to assist us in a specific learning and then move on. Whatever the purpose of being in each others lives it is a beautiful experience. When you connect with your Soul Mate in a love relationship, you have, in effect, found your perfect mate for where you are in your development as a Soul.
People seek this type of love all of their lifes.
I remember one that was called puppy love. That one broke my heart into many little pieces. I was young, age 12 , was very shy. Never kissed a boy before. Ahhh what memories.
Then I met my x, I saw him from afar and fell madly in love with him, knew I would marry him, and two years later I was his wife. I loved him with everything I had. He loved me, as I loved him. A soulmate from the heart.
That was a 31 year marriage, not all of that marriage was happy. I took abuse, for most of it. I guess we fell out of love, I won't say to much more then that.
Now I am looking for a man who has loved and knows love. One that doesn't look at the outside but what is in the inside. The heart , the soul of a person. I am to old to be playing games with men. I don't want someone to show me how much money he has, or how many brains he has. I want him to be who he is inside, on the outside.
Alot of people talk about finding true love, but I am a thinking they don't know how to see it when it comes their way. Is that cause of the money, the games, everything that is now. The internet, which we didn't have when I was growing up. Everything is given easy to these people , but yet they are still blind.
Finding true love isn't about money, its about who soul touches yours, and melts into you.
Mary
I have been thinking alot, I have been writing to a few men here and over on another site. They have made me look deep into my life and to really see what I am looking for. I must not be looking for anything. lol Because no matter what I am thinking its not about a man. Being honest here, I believe truely that when its time , they will be there. Like the song says , You can't hurry love...
One of these men, have actually emailed me and we talked about our issues, sure I have alot of issues. The other was really worried about my spelling, so I got spell check just for him. But he reminded many times that it didn't bother him that I couldn't spell. lol
Well let me see, it did bother me he bought it up, and the other has male issues I can't help out. I can barely take my life the way it is.... To much drama makes me a little bit bitchy.....
I am a calm person, I don't look for any problems, sometimes they come to me . I usually look at them and walk away. I do chase dreams, because I am a dreamer. I see everyone as beautiful, because God didn't make anything ugly....
And God didn't make the world as it is today.
God Bless us all.......
Mary
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